Snow to Rain
by Aubie G
Summary: Shigure's close friend, Nami finds out that after knowing Shigure for 7 years there is still a lot more to learn about the Sohma's...especially this Hatori. HarixOC
1. Chapter 1

1

"Wow for as sociable a person as he is I am surprised he lives in such a secluded area," Nami thought to herself.

She tried to make her way through the dense forest, and prayed she hadn't already gotten lost. Why did her sense of direction always suck? When her emerald eyes spotted a clearing and a house it made Nami's heart jump. Even if it wasn't Shigure's house the people inside would probably know where he lived. She started running letting her ebony hair blow in the wind. Just as she got on the grounds and put on her most polite smile an all too familiar editor with a light blue suit ran by threatening suicide.

It was defiantly Shigure's house.

"Mi wait!" Nami yelled after her.

"Did they send you here too in desperation to get Shigure's manuscript? Did I really fail my job so badly?" She sniffled and pouted in Nami's arms.

Nami gave her most genuine smile, "not at all. Shigure invited me here today. Does he keep teasing you?"

"Mmm hmm."

"You are just pleading with Shigure aren't you? I thought after all these years you would know that doesn't work. Yet you are ignoring the most powerful technique. Shigure's one weakness."

"What is that?"

Nami knocked on the door, "Shigure are you here?"

Not at all to Nami's surprise Shigure came to the door for her, "ahh Nami you are here…and found Mi."

"Yes and do you know what she told me? You really won't believe it. That you hadn't given her your manuscript yet."

"Is that so?"

"Yes, but I completely understand if you can't. I mean after all you are writing in the most beautiful genre of them all, romance. Since your love life is so pathetic it's no wonder you can't get any creativity!"

"You really enjoy being harsh with me don't you Nami?"

"Harsh? Not at all. That wouldn't help write your manuscript," Nami walked closer and closer to him until Shigure was backed against the wall and she was a few inches before him. She let both hands slide down both of his lapels opening his kimono a little bit and put her lips right next to his ear, "now you will get to work right?"

Nami was twirling a strand of his hair and let a sly smile slip on her face when Shigure stumbled, "ye…yes! Of course! I think I need to write now!"

With that Shigure skipped off to a room and Nami turned toward Mi, "see it really isn't that hard. Just use what nature gave you! Gure is really a pervert through and through so it's really a sure fire way to get what you want."

"I think I may just call you," Mi was pale.

"Well of course you can. I don't mind helping at all! Of course it will take precious writing time away from me so extending my deadline each time you call is of course a necessity."

"You're as bad as him."

"You know Mi I can really get him writing faster and have him have his manuscript to you by the end of today. Of course we will need some alone time to uhhh…properly start his juices. Actually you should come back tomorrow morning. We may be busy tonight."

"I'm leaving. Don't tell me anymore. I don't want to know," Mi sulked off into the woods.

After a few moments Shigure came out of his room with a big smile on his face, "and she thinks I am the bad one."

"Only because you put her through all of this. I give my manuscripts right on time and she doesn't even notice how mean I am to her!"

"Interesting tactic…"

"Shigure you didn't tell me we were having a guest! I would have prepared something for her!" a young girl beamed up at him.

Nami exploded, "Shigure you disgusting pervert! I can't believe you would let a high school girl live in your house! What have you been doing to her? You sick disgusting old man."

The girl blushed, "oh no it's not like that at all! Shigure took me in out of the kindness of his heart and in return for room and board I clean for him. So don't worry Shigure is all yours!"

"You really are a sweet girl," Nami laughed, "but Shigure and I aren't really romantically involved. That was just a little tricked we played on our editor so she would leave us alone for the day. I haven't gotten to visit Shigure in quite some time. By the way what is your name?"

"Oh I'm so sorry! I am Tohru Honda," she didn't seem like she had any other emotion but happiness.

"Yes you can see why I just must have Tohru around the house. She just brightens it up so much our flower in this desert," Shigure was off on a tangent again.

"Please excuse me. I will make us some tea," Tohru bowed then scuttled off.

Shigure smiled, "this way. Let's snuggle by the table while we are waiting for Tohru."

"You're the same as ever Shigure," Nami smiled back.

Every part of Shigure's home was traditional. This really was the first time Nami got to visit Shigure at his house. Apparently his last place was not visitor friendly. Still, Nami had quite a few good memories with him at her place after gallivanting the town.

"You're awfully quiet over there Nami, and quiet smiley too. Something on your mind?" Shigure prompted.

"Oh just thinking of when we were younger and would go out on the town together then somehow make it back to my place," she confessed.

The door opened to reveal a boy with the most extravagant face and deep purple eyes, "oh I didn't mean to interrupt. I wasn't aware Shigure was having a visitor."

"No I promise I don't bite come sit with us for a while if you would like," Nami patted a spot next to her.

"Stupid rat! Why the hell do you gotta keep running away from," the owner finally caught up to his voice with bright orange hair.

"My my Shigure how many young people stay at your house?" I am glad there are a few boys to keep watch of that girl from you though," Nami laughed, "they must be your cousin's right? Let me introduce myself my name is Nami."

"My name is Yuki," the boy gestured behind him, "and the obnoxious one is Kyo."

Tohru came in the room bringing tea with her, "I see everyone is here! Kyo you will sit with us won't you?"

"Why do I gotta come over there? It's Shigure's friend…aww alright," Kyo sat next to Tohru.

"So how did you know we were Shigure's cousins?" Yuki inquired while sipping on some tea.

"I really just guessed. I mean you both have that same handsome faces which is a Soma trait I take it, and I know Shigure doesn't have and brothers so it was my only guess," Nami sipped on her tea, "Still as noble as ever Shigure."

"Noble you must not know Shigure that well," Kyo mumbled.

"He's letting you live with him right? It must mean you wanted to escape your home for some reason too. He's always been like that. When I was in my last year of High School I knew I wanted to be a writer and would do anything to get there as fast as possible. I ask this publishing firm to work for them and they offered me an unpaid internship. I was willing to accept to get my foot in the door and know my name. I don't think they realized I was in high school still and must have assumed I worked another part time job in the day. Shigure could sniff out high school girls anywhere even though he had just graduated two years before me.

"One day my internship let me off early, and being the hard headed kid I was I decided not to talk to my family and live on my own which meant staying on a park bench any night I could get sleep. I really didn't know it at the time But Shigure was running from his editor at the building and spotted me on the bench. I don't think he stopped laughing for five minutes.

"Once he was able to control himself he sat next to me and found out I had nowhere to go. He didn't try to push me as someone else's problem but apologized for not being able to take me in himself with his family. I of course objected, but being Shigure he took me by the hand and showed me these apartments he remembered were for rent, and offered to pay for me until I graduated and got some savings. I couldn't accept but the next day I was let off from work he was outside waiting for me and showed me to my new home. I don't know how a 20 year old managed to pay for his own expenses plus mine, but that's Shigure," Nami sighed her eyes far away as if they could see that time perfectly.

"Shigure I never knew you helped people so readily like that. You're so admirable!" Tohru gawked.

"Yes well I couldn't pass up a pretty high school girl like that when she was in such need," Shigure patted Nami's head.

Nami ignored the condescending gesture as she stared at Yuki more, "you know you look so familiar. I know we haven't met but still. I know this is just a shot in the dark, but Yuki you wouldn't happen to be Ayame Soma's brother would you?"

"As perceptive as always," Shigure confirmed.

Yuki's features darkened, "I am sorry you had to meet that bumbling fool."

"Yes well you don't really act anything like Aya I must admit. I guess that's why it took me so long to figure out, but your physical appearance gave you away," Nami smiled.

"The front door was open so I let myself in," a deep voice called, "so where is Tohru, Shigure?"

A tall man in a doctor's uniform with jet black hair looked at Shigure who wore sheepish look. The man assessed the rest of the table and saw Tohru sitting comfortably with everyone and turned to leave.

"Hari wait I can explain," Shigure pulled on his jacket letting Hari drag him.

"You know my time is very precious and I am very busy during this season so why did you decide to drag me down here for no reason?" He glared down at Shigure.

Shigure pointed toward the table, "you didn't notice I had a guest I wanted you to meet. I told her she could interview you since you are a doctor and she wanted to write a book about one."

"I…" he trailed.

Nami bowed, "let me apologize. I had no idea Shigure didn't tell you the reason why he wanted you down here although I should have guessed after knowing him for so long. Please if you have more work to go to you should get to it. I am sorry for any inconvenience I caused you."

"It was no trouble at all!" That familiar boisterous voice cut through the air, "Nami it has been far too long since you let your lovely gaze caress my whole body."

"Hello Aya it's nice to see you again too," Nami laughed.

"Hatori it is simply unacceptable you have not met Shigure's and mine friend for seven years yet. You simply must stay!" Aya pranced around him.

"Hari take that wretched thing out of this house," Yuki demanded.

"My brother! How I've missed you so. I know you have missed me more than you can describe too. Oh Nami this is…"

"Your little brother Yuki. I already got the chance to meet him and I could just tell that he was yours Aya," Nami smiled hoping to calm him down though she knew it was futile.

"You could tell by how he resembled my dashing looks, or his confidence, or did he just hope you knew my name?" Ayame went on his tangent and then proceeded to bother Yuki.

Nami went up to Hatori, "really I am sorry I bothered you."

"Really Hari you wouldn't be so cold as to leave now. I am just about to spend quality time with my little brother who I haven't seen in ages," Ayame was about to hug Yuki.

"Shigure do you have extra spaces to accommodate guests?" Hatori sighed.

Shigure beamed, "of course Hari! I didn't know you'd want to spend the night. It really has been too long since we had together."

"Good that means Ayame can bond with his brother tonight. I will be off and pick you up tomorrow," Hari grabbed his medical bag and walked out the door.

"I guess Hari can't stand the sight of a pretty girl like you Nami," Shigure sighed, "hey Yuki can you please not smash up the house?"

"It's ok Shigure he's so overjoyed to see me…"

Nami was out of the doors and grabbed at Hatori's sleeve. He looked back with a cocked eyebrow. The cool winter air swirled around them and it started to snow. It really looked nice against his black hair.

"Just be safe on your journey home. I didn't want you to leave without that. I just…I wanted to thank you for all of the time you have protected Shigure and Ayame when I couldn't. You seem to really worry about them and seem to be the responsible one. I'm sure you've helped them countless times when I couldn't be there. So thank you," Nami hoped she wasn't babbling.

"Take care," was all he said before he drove off leaving a flurry of flakes behind.

"Nami," Shigure called, "come on! The kids thought we were too loud or something so let's have a real party now they're gone."

"I even brought some saki!" Aya flashed the bottle out from nowhere.

This would be a long night.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey so a few things about this fanfic. It is based on the anime version of Fruba not the manga, and it will be updated every Wednesday. Thanks for reading. P.S reviews make me happy!

2

How did Shigure always get his way? At least the house was quite now with him and Ayame asleep. Nami browsed the pantry and found all the ingredients for miso soup. It was a hangover tradition to eat miso. It was just convenient it was winter so the kids might be able to eat some too without being disgusted. Nami was working cheerfully when she heard quiet steps enter the kitchen.

Nami spun around to see Tohru with shock plastered across her face, "good morning. Did you manage to get any sleep with us being so noisy all night?"

"You're making breakfast? I'm sorry that is supposed to be my job! I didn't know you'd be hungry and when you would get up and everything and so…" Tohru was so upset.

"Chill out. I always make breakfast when I hang out with those two. Plus after we must have kept you up all night it's the least I can do to make some for you," Nami was stirring the pot.

"Miss Honda that soup really…" Yuki was caught off guard to see another woman over the stove, "oh it's you Miss Nami. I didn't expect you to be up so early."

"You really are quite the gentleman Yuki. Are you two hungry it's all ready," Nami poured the bowls already presuming.

"Thank you very much you are too kind," Tohru smiled obviously not used to being waited on.

"Now where's Kyo? Don't you kids have High School?" Nami thought aloud.

"Is that miso? Gross that means leeks too," Kyo arrived after his voice again.

"Morning Kyo. So you don't like leeks?" Nami already started looking through the refrigerator.

"Course I don't you know that...you're not Tohru," Kyo looked away.

Nami held out some fish, "how about some cod with yours? I find it tend to cut the leek flavor a bit. You seem like you would like fish."

"Uhhh sure," he sat himself down at the table.

With that they ate in peaceful silence until the end of the meal Nami asked, "do you all need a ride to school? I don't mind since I am heading to town already."

"Oh you're not waiting to say goodbye to Ayame or Shigure?" Tohru's head was cocked.

"No. I really wasn't supposed to stay the night at all, but when Shigure and Ayame are together they are pretty much unstoppable. Plus I think they will be asleep for a while. Anyway I have a job to get to," Nami smiled.

The car ride was quiet. They all must have been more tired than she thought. Hopefully Shigure or Ayame would find the note she left. Although by now they should be able to guess where she would be off too. The kids were thankful for their ride and Nami lived pretty close to their school so she got her supplies and was off. She was bored of her usual spot so she drove around until she found a more peaceful spot for today.

A nice large house on the edge of town looked interesting. Nami set up her easel and readied her charcoal for pedestrians. After waiting a few minutes and seeing nobody the large gated house looked stoic in the snow so she drew that instead.

Nami was pulled out of her fantasy land when she heard her name. At first she thought it would be Aya or Shigure to bother her until she realized the voice was too deep for either one. Peering over her pad of paper she saw the doctor from last night…Hatori.

"Oh hello I didn't think I would be running into you so soon again," Nami greeted.

Hatori crossed the street, "what are you doing here?"

"Well you see I am a novelist as my official job, but when I am not writing I like to go all across the city and just observe and draw the scenes down. The best way to create a successful story is by making the characters believable. So I try to watch all different people and their mannerisms and sometimes…well almost always I write blurbs beside their image. I guess you could call it research but I think it's fun too," Nami laughed while still holding her charcoal in hand, "what are you doing here?"

"I live here."

"Here? I mean I know doctors were never poor, but I never thought that they were this rich!"

"It's not just me living there. Most of my extended family does too. Not so long ago Shigure lived here."

"Oh duh. Sorry I guess that was pretty dumb of me to think you lived there all by yourself. So are you heading off to work?"

"I dedicate my work to only the Soma family as you can see it is rather large so I never get bored."

"Then you must be heading out to pick up Aya right?"

"Yes."

"I wouldn't do that quiet yet if I were you. Aya brought over some liquid fun last night. I already called in his shop to tell his assistant he was sick for the day and I took Shigure's manuscript to Mi so she wouldn't kill herself."

"It's alright I will just drag his body out of the house into the car he'll come."

"That seems like a lot of trouble for you and you must be busy the rest of the day. Why don't I just pick him up and bring him back here a little later. It is my fault he wanted to stay and you were kind enough to let him."

"Ayame can't take walks in this cold of weather."

"Oh don't worry I have my car right over there."

"I didn't realize that either one of them could have a responsible friend."

"Well you're their friend right?"

"Unfortunately I am. You really should get inside soon. You must have been out here for a while since your shivering. You will get sick."

"I didn't even realize I was. Hey if you have some extra time now would you wanna grab a cup of coffee with me. It looks like you need it as much as I do."

"I really should be getting back to work."

"It will only take as long as it takes you to drink it. Plus I need to make sure you're a good friend to Shigure and Ayame."

"You won't let me say no will you?"

"If you really want me to be all alone trying to warm back up then I guess I can tell the kind of person you are."

"Let's go," he sighed.

Nami shoved her art materials in her backseat and went on her way. The heavy clouds finally let out some of the snow that they had been threatening to all morning. She noticed the smallest smile crawl on his lips when it came down, and yet he looked even sadder than before.

"We're here! My favorite coffee joint. This will warm us up in no time at all," Nami stretched out now that her muscles were relaxing in the warm air.

"You were the one that was cold."

"And you were the gentleman who accompanied me so I wouldn't be lonely. So how long have you Known Aya and Shigure?" Nami threw herself on the plush couch without letting any of her coffee spill.

"Since we were children. We grew up just inside of where you were standing. We went to all the same schools together."

"Wow you guys must have had all the ladies drooling over you. I don't think you are allowed to be ugly and be in the Soma family."

"There are many ways to be ugly."

"True, but Shigure and Aya have good hearts. So really how many girlfriends did they have back then?"

"None really. You might have guessed that they were more of the flirting type than ones to actually follow through with a relationship."

"Hahaha. So they really haven't changed much."

"No. Their maturity level is stuck permanently as teenagers."

"So why did you become a doctor?"

Hatori let out a smile which Nami could tell was rare for him, "I wanted to help others for once."

"Hrrmmm that's strange."

"How so?"

"From everything I have seen you always are protecting others. The way you looked when you first came in at Shigure was to make sure he was alright it seemed like. And you came for Tohru Honda who isn't even a part of your family. Even the way you had Aya with you means that you are with him probably making sure he doesn't do anything too irrational when he came over. Yes you're just like a guardian dragon."

Hatori seemed as if he really was about to laugh with the last comment, "a dragon huh?"

"Yeah you know like the ones you hear about in the Chinese folk tales that watch over families and guard people. You're like one of those."

"Do you do this with everyone? I mean assign them an animal."

"Sometimes it just comes to me. You know what I think Shigure is most like?"

"What?"

"A dog."

Hatori really did let out a laugh this time, "now I'm interested on how you got that one."

"Well generally dogs are pretty playful and can cause a lot of trouble if they are not trained well. They always can see the best in people, but the most important thing is that they are loyal and will protect the ones they are closest with when times get rough."

"So do you have an animal for Aya then too?"

"Yup. I think this one is really perfect."

"And what is that?"

"A peacock!"

Hatori let out a whole rolling laugh almost like he was relieved, "yes he can be quite the show off sometimes."

"Well I see you are done your coffee. I am grateful you didn't really take me up on my offer and run as soon as you were done. I think I have taken up enough of your time though," Nami took their cups and gave them to the store clerk.

"It was interesting to talk with you."

"Good to get out of that house huh?"

"It is nice to have a break once in a while. You car is parked in front of the house so I will walk you there."

"Now you really are just sucking up to me to earn brownie points."

"It's in the same direction."

"Sure if that's your excuse go with it," Nami winked.

Hatori walked Nami to the car and they said their goodbyes. Once she started the car with heat blasting she thought it would probably be late enough to go back and reheat the miso that was undoubtedly untouched still.

Nami was able to find Shigure's house much easier the second time around even with the snow adding for extra distraction. She let herself in the door and went straight for the kitchen. Better to wake them up with food than nothing at all.

"Nami," the dramatic voice that was not supposed to be up yet, "you left us to fend for ourselves. And to think in this state too."

Shigure had to join in the festivities, "and your note wasn't even written on cute paper or adorned with thousands of hearts. It was so cold only telling us you left."

"We couldn't even eat the delicious miso because we were so stricken with grief that you weren't here," Ayame covered his face to make sure he was more dramatic than Shigure.

"Let's be honest you two just didn't know how. Well don't worry I came back for you and you must not have been up that long," Nami put the three bowls of miso on the table, "come on let's eat now."

"So what was so important that you would leave us behind?" Shigure asked while sipping on his soup.

"What do I do every morning Shigure? I always draw and you know that. Even after our wonderful escapades. You're usually asleep by the time I got back. I guess today I got a little carried away. Oh I will show you some!" Nami ran out for her pad and came back, "I only got one thing done today before I met a wonderful man who swept me off my feet. Yes I could hardly leave his side he was so charming and handsome. I almost married him right there."

Aya looked like he was about to faint, "about to marry a man before we approve of him. You know that's unacceptable."

"I'm kidding. Here look at where I was at today," Nami presented the pad toward them.

Shigure looked genuinely shocked for a moment, "you were at Soma house?"

"Apparently! I didn't even realize it until Hatori came out and called my name and told me," Nami laughed.

Shigure gave a mischievous smile, "ahhh so you did get to talk to Hatori."

"Yeah I did. So what was that crap last night about me wanting to write a novel about a doctor? You told me you wanted to meet one of your friends!" Nami's brows pulled together.

"Well Hari wouldn't be very happy with that response so I thought it would be more likely to talk to him if I said that," Shigure mumbled between the slurps of his soup.

Aya had been quiet for too long, "so how long did you get to talk to him? What did he tell you?"

"Well I think he thought I was nuts standing outside his house and probably a stalker, but really the gates looked so pretty and the house held such mystery I had to draw it. He was pretty polite though and was about to leave and get you Aya but I wanted you to rest more. Anyway one thing led to another and we got some coffee together," Nami gushed.

Aya looked flabbergasted, "wait Hari and you went on a date?"

"Well…" Nami was interrupted.

"That's a first for Hari in a long while," Shigure thought aloud.

That caught Nami's interest, "he went out with someone before?"

"Oopsy I've said too much!" Shigure tittered casually sliding away from Nami.

"Uggghhh! I am gonna kill you, you stupid dog!" Nami chased him.

The chase didn't last long since Shigure stopped right in his tracks, "what did you say?"

"Oh," Nami blushed, "it's just something I talked about with Hatori today. I decided what animals you all were most like."

Shigure's eyebrow raised, "really? What did you think Hari's animal was?"

Nami looked away, "I really don't have to go into this with you guys. It was just a silly conversation."

"Tell us or I promise you I will bother you nonstop while you are trying to work!" Shigure pulled at Nami's sleeve.

"Ugh Gure you really can be annoying you know. I thought Hari was like a dragon," Nami hopped they wouldn't ask why.

Shigure looked pretty pale. Maybe he was feeling the effect of last night suddenly, but Aya recovered for him, "what did you think I was?"

"A peacock," Nami mumbled.

Both the boys started laughing as if they were relieved. Just like Hatori Nami was really confused, "why is that so funny? You're laughing like Hatori was…like you were relieved about something."

"Shigure and I are relieved you finally found yourself a man. I approve you can go and get married now like you wanted," Aya smiled and messing with her hair, "you simply must let me design your dress though!"

Nami kept tight lips, "ok I think I need to take Aya home Gure. I'm leaving. Otherwise I don't care about your health condition and how you can't walk in the cold. You will if you don't come with me now Ayame."

"Oohh whole name treatment you better go for your own safety Aya," Shigure teased.

"Well if you are going to be so rude I better warn Hari before you get married," Aya chortled.

Nami grabbed him by the collar, "if you so much as say one thing to Hari…"

"Shigure did you hear that. She called him Hari!" Aya interrupted gleefully.

Nami started to storm out, "I'm leaving. Maybe I will see you in the car if I don't get the temptation to run over you Aya. Shigure it was nice seeing you for the last time."

"Nami," Shigure smiled, "you know us better than to really get upset with us don't you. You usually take our teasing very well."

"When it comes to dating you guys are usually terrifying over protective brothers. Now that you approve of a guy that I didn't even date it's really frightening," Nami sighed, "well bye!"

Nami ran to her car and counted to see how long it would take for those two to say their goodbyes. When Aya finally emerged Nami revved the car Ayame ran dramatically toward it and jumped in. Nami rolled down the window and said her goodbyes.

"Don't be a stranger. Drop in when you get the chance!" Shigure yelled over the roaring engine.

"Anytime?" Nami challenged.

"Sure!"

"You'll regret that Gure!" With that Nami drove with Aya off into the distance.


	3. Chapter 3

3

Ayame and Nami sat in the car with silence as their only other companion. Nami didn't realize that Aya knew what silence was. His gold eyes stared out into the bleak scenery. The silence only lasted a moment longer until he returned to his normal jubilant self. Nami had to remind Ayame that she still had no clue where to drop him off at. It took twice as long as they should of with Ayay telling her all the wrong directions, but Aya finally gave up his game and let Nami park at the house.

"We really should see each other more. Shigure gets to hog you because of work," Aya pouted.

Nami nodded, "yes we should. Hey maybe we could spend a day together alone to make Gure jealous and have you buy me lunch like a date. That would really get under his skin."

"Yes well you simply must walk me inside to my room. It's too cold and treacherous for me to go out by myself."

"Aya it's a few feet to the door. How far away could you live?"

"With a grand place like that I could collapse easily and not have anyone find me for days. But if you want to be responsible for my death it's alright," Aya turned to the door.

Nami rolled her eyes, "you haven't changed a bit. You're as overdramatic as always. I'll come."

Nami braced herself for the cold and it really did seem to get colder than before. Aya strode ahead of her, "let's get inside quick."

With that Ayame slipped past the massive doors. Nami protested and didn't see the point of her walking with Ayame if he was just going to run ahead of her like this. When she stepped through the threshold the place did seem bigger from the inside. It wasn't just one big house, but a complex of them. It really must be a large family. Nami couldn't help but stand there and be in awe of such a place. As many houses as there were there was no sign of life in any of them.

Nami pulled herself out of her stupor and realized that she had lost him, "Aya?"

Instead of hearing the crunch of snow with her next step Nami heard a more stifled noise. She looked down to see Ayame's clothes on the ground. Nami gnashed her teeth together, "Aya this better be some sick joke. You cannot be stripping in weather like this."

Nami gathered up his clothes and pressed them tightly against her chest to restrain the anger bubbling up inside of her. She had no idea where she was going or where even to begin to find Ayame in a place like this. Not only that but she must look like a total nutcase trespassing with Aya's clothes. He was going to pay for this.

It really was starting to get cold and she was completely lost and she was completely fed up with his antics. Nami threw the clothes down and sat on the porch that looked out on a zen garden. That was at least really beautiful. The stark contrast between the pure snow and rocks would have caught Nami's attention if she wasn't so worried.

"We seem to keep bumping into each other don't we?" Nami spun around to find Hari right behind her.

Words poured out of her mouth, "I am so sorry. I must seem like a complete weirdo, but I was just brining Aya home and he insisted that I walk with him incase his sickness started to act up, but then he ran ahead of me. Next think I know I find his clothes on the ground and…ahh!"

Hari's face looked grave, "what is it?"

"I think something slithered up my shirt," she didn't think her day could get any worse.

A white snake popped his head right out of Nami's shirt, but before she could get any more upset or think to do anything Hari grabbed the snake and pulled it right out. He looked more irked than ever, "I will take care of this. I am sorry if this caused you any more distress. Sometimes this snake gets out of his cage when children on the grounds don't take proper care of it."

Hatori slipped past the doors and while Nami was trying to calm herself down and take in everything that just happened he was already back out again looking a little more composed, "so you can't find Ayame?"

"No one minute he's there and the next he's gone. I was really hoping to find you and thought he might be with you. Maybe I should go looking again," Nami was about to leave until Hari grabbed her arm.

"Try not to worry too much. You know Aya and his antics. He probably was just trying to get you worked up like this. It's better if you don't let him get that satisfaction," Hari lit up a cigarette.

Nami covered her mouth but couldn't hide her laughing, "you're a doctor right?"

"Yes..."

"I'm sorry I shouldn't laugh, but it's really too funny. A doctor that smokes. Don't you think that is an oxymoron right there? Do you discourage your patients from smoking too?"

"I picked up this habit before I decided to become a doctor. Unfortunately now it is a little ironic though."

"Thanks."

"For what?"

"You've really been kind to me. You were able to calm me down and then with that snake you got rid of it for me. If it had been just me I don't know what I would have done. I can see why Gure and Aya have you as their friend. You really have been to kind to a stranger like me."

"I can at least try to make up for Ayame's stupidity."

"Really I should expect it by now for as long as I've known him. I think you are just a noble person at heart. I just hope that doesn't end up hurting you in the end," Nami thought aloud.

"I hope I am not interrupting anything. Oh what am I saying I know you are overjoyed to have me here," Ayame paraded from behind them.

Nami punched Aya as hard in his stomach as possible and sat back down, "Hari I think I really need to be check out to see if my muscles are spazing. They get this insatiable urge to punch something."

"Hari she hit me," Aya pouted leaning on him.

"Nami don't worry that urge is normal. When somebody's stupidity is that great it's the body's only natural defense against it," Hatori put out his cigarette.

"You both are ignoring me," Ayame cried.

Nami got up to look him right in the eye, "please don't do that to me again. I was so worried about you. I thought someone might be out to hurt you and I wouldn't know where to find you or help. When I'm around I want you to stay by my side because I love you too much to ever let anything happen ok?"

Aya gathered the tear sliding down her cheek on his finger, "of course."

"I better get going. I have relied on the Sohma's hospitality too long the past few days. Thank you so much," Nami bowed and walked away with another tear sliding down her face.

Once Nami was out of sight Aya glanced toward Hatori, "I can't help but love her straight forwardness. It's truly admirable. She is not afraid to show that she was worried or hide the pain she feels. It's scary being vulnerable but she exposes herself again and again."

"Is that why you stay by her?" Hari lit another one up.

"Part of the reason. She didn't catch onto anything so you don't have to tell Akito right? It might kill Shigure if she ever had her memories erased. It's the one outsider he's been able to bond to," Aya pondered aloud.

"No she really thought you were playing a nasty trick on her."

"She does know I am capable of such cruel things," Aya sighed.

"If you stay out here much longer you are going to transform again," Hari stated before recessing back inside himself.

Nami looked around the seemingly endless estate. The Sohma's must have been more rich and powerful than she thought. Being here was so overwhelming. All the time Nami imagined Shigure here…trapped. Now she was here. What happens right when she gets here? Aya runs off and she couldn't even protect him. Although that wasn't really rational since he was the one playing a trick on her. Still Nami couldn't shake the feeling like she had to protect all of the Sohma's from something…even when she met Yuki and Kyo. Being here exacerbated the feeling.

"Oh shit," Nami muttered to herself upon realizing she had no idea where she was going.

She couldn't go back and ask for directions and look even more pathetic in front of Hatori, and Aya wouldn't let her live it down for who knows how long. She would just have to brave the cold and walk aimlessly until she found the main gate. Hopefully there was only one exit.

Why did she have to get herself into these situations? She might have to break down, face shame, and ask for directions. Still, none of the houses looked occupied.

While Nami was looking there was a voice, "you look lost. You must not be from around here."

Nami's heart raced when she found the voice belonged to a pale man draped around a window with black hair, "oh, yes you're right. My name is Nami and I just finished dropping Ayame off from Shigure's house. I wouldn't be intruding any longer but I am a little lost and can't find the gate."

"So you're the one Shigure guarded so much. Yes you've gotten him into a lot of trouble and put me through pain."

"I'm sorry! I never meant to hurt anyone."

"But you did. You must have known Shigure had a family to go home to, and yet you let him stay so many nights with you. He even got so bold as to leave me because of your actions."

"He's an adult. Maybe he just wanted to live life independently, but that doesn't mean he doesn't care for you. Maybe he doesn't know you're upset."

"Shigure knows, but has done nothing. You took him away from his family. He worries so much about you he doesn't come home. It's your fault he's suffering."

"He seems very happy and if he doesn't come back how would you know how he feels?"

"You think Shigure would let you know? He would protect you from everything. Even if it meant he had to suffer. If you really loved him you would never see him again. So he could stop worrying about offending you and come back to the people who love him for who he is."

"I do love him for who he is."

"You know nothing about us and never will."

"Akito," Hatori placed his hand on Nami's shoulder, "you should not be hanging out of the window like that with this frigid air. It will do nothing to help get you better. Please go inside I will be right with you."

Akito melded back to the darkness as Hari turned to her, "I'm sorry. If you have some spare time I would like to talk to you more. Momiji here can show you the way back to my office."

Nami nodded unable to deny a Sohma anything now. Hari braved the darkness she knew _he _was in. How did Akito know what to say that would hurt her so much?

"You look cold," Momiji looked so kind like the opposite of _him_, "we should go back to Hari's office to warm you up. What's your name?"

"I'm Nami," she knew she should interact with the friendly boy but could not muster anything.

"I heard you stayed at Shigure's. That means you met Tohru right?"

"Oh yes. She was such a nice girl."

"Mmhmm. So how long have you known Shigure?"

"Seven years now. This is the first time I've been to the Soma house."

"Don't feel bad though! Not many of us ever have friends over. Please don't blame him okay? It's nothing you did."

"You're such a nice boy. The world needs more people like you and Tohru. I am sure both of you have many challenges to face every day, and yet you manage to keep that smile on."

"Thank you! Here's Hari's office. Make yourself comfortable I will be right back and get us something to warm up," and with that the boy was off in a flash.

Nami was cold, but she didn't want to be alone inside. The rock garden was so elegant in the snow. It seemed to fit Hari to have it. What did she know though? If she knew nothing about Shigure after seven years then how could she even guess to what Hatori was like after only meeting him a few times? Still Nami couldn't help but want to know more so she went in the office to find clues even if it was a bit strange to be inside.

It was a simple office. There was a desk and a few chairs but the walls were lined with books. Everything was perfectly organized and professional except for one personal possession. There was a picture of a girl smiling with chestnut hair and similar eyes. Was it a girlfriend?

But didn't Aya and Shigure think that Hari and her went on a date and approved? They seem very close to Hatori and surely if this girl was important enough to put a picture of her in his office she was no secret lover. Could she be a sister? That seemed like the only answer.

When Nami looked down at the picture in her hands again there was a wet spot on the glass. She touched her cheek and realized tears were spilling. Her body felt weak and the tears wouldn't stop. She ran her fingers through her midnight hair since her hands were shaking too violently to write and calm herself like she usually did. The sense of loss and tragedy overwhelmed her for no apparent reason. She put the photo back on the shelf to protect it from her tenuous grasp.

Hari's calm hand found her shoulder, "Akito upset you very much didn't he?"

Nami's heart protested against her rib cage, "I…uh…didn't hear you come in."

"Apparently, your heart is racing."

"How did you know?"

"I guess I have been a doctor for too ling. I unintentionally check pulses when I shake hands or have my hand near a throat."

"Oh. Well thank you for everything today, but I have stayed long enough."

"Before you go I would like to talk. It would have been a waste of your time if I kept you here just so you could leave. Please have a seat," Nami did as she was told and Hari continued, "I know what Akito said was harsh but try not to take what he says too seriously. He seems mature but because he has such frequent illness he isn't able to go out much and interact with people. The ones he has around are very precious to him."

"Thank you for taking this time to make me feel better. I appreciate it. It was nice meeting you."

"You make it sound like this is the last time we will talk. I hope that isn't the case. It was refreshing to have another sane person to counterbalance Ayame's and Shigure's antics."

"Thanks. I feel like…oh my gosh Momiji. He has been away for so long!"

"Did he tell you he would get something to warm you up?"

"Yes…"

"Right he probably thought you wanted some time to yourself. He probably won't be back."

"Oh. Tell him I said goodbye too then. If you wouldn't mind can you please tell me how to get to the main gate? I got lost last time."

"I'll walk you there," Hatori sighed.

The two walked in silence until Nami was at those massive gates. She was so relieved to not run into Akito again. Nami gave Hatori a standard farewell while she left and drover her car back her apartment. Even that was hard to go into. It was the same place Shigure had bought for her so many years ago. All those memories…

She walked toward the answering machine that was frantically blinking to announce new messages. Nami pressed the button and collapsed on her bed.

_First new message received on December 6 at 3:06:_

_Hello Nami it's Shigure! I know you didn't pick up the phone so you would be able to hear my voice all night long with this recording. Anyway, I wanted to see if you had gotten home safely. Call me back when you get this._

_Next message received on December 6 at 5:32:_

_Hey Nami it's Shigure again. I just wanted you make sure you got my last message and got home safely. You're probably out drawing again. Call me back._

_Next message received on December 6 at 6:37:_

_Nami, I really hope you're in by now. It's dark and you know there are weirdos out. Please call me soon. If you don't I might have to come up there to make sure you're ok._

_End of messages._

The last message was sent only five minutes ago. Nami didn't realize it had gotten so late. It really was dark and she had spent such a long time at the Soma's. She was in no mood to talk to anyone, especially not Shigure, but if she didn't call back he would march up to her room. Damn her for letting him have the key. She knew seeing him in that state would be worse so Nami put on her best voice while waiting for Shigure to pick up.

"Hello?" Nami could tell that he was worried though most others probably couldn't.

"Hey it's me. I saw you called so I am just calling you back."

"I almost went out there to find you. I guess I got worried over nothing. You really should have a cell phone you know."

"You should too."

"So you were out all day after dropping Aya off at the gates?"

"Yeah I was outside most of it. It was probably not smart. It was pretty cold and now I am exhausted so I am going to bed early. Is it ok if we make this short?"

"Alright, just don't forget to eat."

"Yes. Bye."

"Talk to you soon," Shigure's voice trailed into the dial tone. 

As soon as the phone was off tears invaded Nami's eyes again. She didn't even have the courage to ask him if he was happy or not, or if she had caused him trouble through the years. Maybe she didn't need to after what happed today and how he got so worried. She had already put him through stress. How could she burden him anymore?

The night leaked in through the windows; Nami didn't have the strength to turn on the lights.


	4. Chapter 4

Hey I am really sorry that this is a day late in publishing. I am really busy in the middle of my finals though. Sorry to make you all wait, but I hope it was worth it. Reviews always help motivate my writing (not a subtle hint at all eh?).

4

Nami's insides were being chewed out. Indecision had paralyzed her so she couldn't get out of bed. It wasn't just her muscles that were stuck in this state, but her mind as well. She was not able to think, feel, or react to anything. Hunger and sleep didn't register either. The only thing her brain would process was Shigure's voice on the answering machine growing steadily more frantic as the days passed. It was his voice that would pin her to bed.

The phone whined but Nami ignored it. The answering machine continued its duty.

_Nami it's Shigure of course. I am not doing Mi's work and threatening you with suicide because your manuscript is late. I'm sure you already have enough messages of those clogging up your answering machine. I should have realized that you were upset with me when you were so short…when was it…three days ago? I should have known something was wrong, but I didn't. Please call me. You can yell, cry, or whatever as long as I know you're alive. Please Nami I don't know how much more of this I can take. I'll be by the phone_

His voice had so much pain in it. More than Nami ever had heard in her life. The worst part of it was it was because of her. She was the one who should have known after all these years, and yet he is blaming himself. If she really loved him she would break off contact with him by telling him instead of keeping him guessing. Why did she lead him on like this? It was her fault.

This was dangerous this thinking. So she allowed time to pass. Nami could not gauge how much of it went by. Nami wasn't interrupted from her catatonic state by the phone crying like a hungry child; rather it was a more terrifying noise…a knock at the door.

Nami couldn't find her words, but she admittedly did not look very hard. Every nail that had been pinning her down was nothing compared to the one driven straight through her heart by that monotonous sound.

The deadbolt was lifted away as careful steps were approaching until there was an abrupt stop. A sharp breath was sucked in as the steps became more frantic and finally arrived at her bed. Nami hadn't had the courage to open her eyes. A hand appeared at her wrist followed by a long sigh.

"Nami," it wasn't the voice she was expecting…who was it? "I know you're awake and can hear me. Please you have to get up. You have to go see Shigure."

"His name wrenched the nail in her heart but it continued on, "he needs you very much. Yuki called me to tell me that Shigure was worrying himself sick. He won't let anyone near him. Not even me or Aya. If you keep on going like this he won't get better."

There was a pause but with no response it continued, "I know you are a better person than this. You would not abandon a friend to such a cruel fate over some gossip you heard. You've only ever brought happiness to Shigure's life until now. He has been getting better and better every year you've known him. Before you he really was pathetic. You are the one who brought him happiness, and you're the only one who can bring it back. Please I need Shigure too."

His voice seemed so strange because it was broken but she knew it now. It was Hatori begging. Hatori, who was so strong and kept the perfect façade, was showing his weakest side. How could she not believe him when he was exposing himself like this?

Nami's eyes opened with her suspicion confirmed, "I'll go."

Hatori let out a genuine smile, "thank you so much."

"I…I need some help sitting up," Nami blushed.

"How long have you been like this?" Hari carefully sat her upright, "I thought you were dead when I first came in."

"When was I at Sohma house?"

"That long? I am getting food into you immediately. If you go to Shigure looking like this I am sure he will just get more worried. Where do you keep your soup?"

"On the top left cupboard in the kitchen out there."

Hari disappeared into the kitchen and turned on the stove when she processed what he was doing.

"Wait I'll…" Nami wanted to protest more but her legs collapsed beneath her.

Hari let out a small chuckle when he picked her up, "just like a newborn. Please rest here. You're my patient now and it's my job as a doctor to take care of you however I must to get you better. Drink some water you must be thirsty." 

Nami took the glass and started to drink it slowly until she realized how thirsty she was. She gulped the rest of the water down in seconds. It was pathetic how heavy the glass felt in her hands. Hari kept refilling her glass as soon as it was finished and in the time it took to cook the ramen she had finished seven glasses. At least by the last few the glass didn't feel as heavy.

"I would have prepared something more elaborate but I wanted to get some food in you as quickly as possible," Hatori apologized.

Nami shook her head, "no you are my guest I should be making you the food. It really is fine."

"I'm a doctor and this is your treatment. You should slow down on eating that. If you eat it too fast then you will throw up all my hard work," Hari took the spoon and started to feed her, "if I do it you won't be tempted to speed up."

Nami blushed. She should have been embarrassed because Hatori was feeding her like a child and enforcing the infant idea, but that wasn't the reason she blushed. He managed to make the whole ordeal…romantic. It was something about the Sohma's which they were able to manipulate any situation to their advantage if they wanted and could make any woman, or man, swoon. It was not only because they were all brutally handsome, but their personality as well.

"You still won't be able to move properly until you let some of your food digest. Do you have a T.V to pass the time?" Hari suggested sitting on the bed next to her.

"No I actually don't. I am usually wrapped up in writing to have any time to watch television. Most of the crap on there kills my creativity anyway."

"You do have a lot of papers around…"

"I'm sorry it's so messy. I usually only have Shigure and Aya over who really don't care. I guess I am just a slob."

"Well they are your stories right?"

"Oh yeah. My manuscript is the one with the big pile over there but the rest are just little nothings nobody reads."

"What's the point of a story if nobody reads them?"

"To stop them from rattling in my head at night and keeping me up. That's when all true writers ideas come you know."

"Well why don't you see what it's like to have a reader interact with them?"

"Because it's embarrassing. As long as I keep my job I don't need to know."

"You never have been curious to see how your readers react to your work? How it moves them? Come on it will be fun."

"I…uhhh..I guess."

"So what should I pick?"

"I guess whatever seems the most interesting to you. Their titles are on the top of the page and the pages are stapled together which I know is trite but they're not serious works or anything."

"These look nice," Hari brought over three stories Nami created, "ahhh good they're nothing like Shigure's smut novels he writes in his spare time."

"No Shigure is a pervert at heart and I am not," Nami smiled.

Hari read all three of them aloud. His voice was actually pretty good for reading. He knew when to pause and got into character a bit. She was surprised at how good he was at it. Hatori seemed like he guarded his emotions so much. Maybe this was a release for him to indulge in a flurry of emotions without being judged. In what seemed like no time he had finished the stories.

"Well what did you think?" Nami decided to ask although she was nervous of the response.

Hari let a smile flash across his face, "they really were well written. You're characterization was so believable. I think that is the biggest challenge a novelist faces is getting the readers to empathize and understand every character no matter how atrocious."

"Wow what an articulate response. I am flattered thank you," Nami was excited to hear someone who didn't just say this is nice that wasn't her editor.

Hatori went to the other side of her room, "can you walk to me? I think the food has digested enough by now."

Nami prayed that she could. It was so embarrassing the way that Hari could pick her up like a rag doll, and still he managed to make that charming as well. Nami's limbs were more willing to cooperate with the nutrition and she beamed at reaching him without faltering.

"Good. You should get changed and I will wait in the kitchen. I want to take you to Shigure's house now. He needs you," Hatori guised his order as a suggestion.

"Aye aye captain," Nami was in better spirits now that Hari was here. Before everything had seemed so hopeless, but now she felt like she could manage.

Nami picked out the first things from her drawer. She pieced together a purple turtleneck, with a white mini skirt, and some tan soft boots with white fuzz peeping out from inside. She even put on eyeliner and mascara and didn't let her laziness get the best of her.

Nami danced out with her newfound energy, "alright I am ready!"

Hatori paused for a moment staring at her, "um right. My car is down this way."

He had a practical black car. That seemed so like Hari. The ease she managed to find in the apartment was wearing off now that she realized she would have to face Shigure in whatever state she had left him.

"You must have gone to Shigure's house earlier since you had the key to get into my apartment. How bad was he Hari?" Nami shifted in her seat.

He glanced at her, "he'll be much better once you're there."

Nami sighed know that was not a good sign, but she really could not change anything now. As much as it would hurt her to see Shigure upset she deserved all the pain that was inflicted on her. How would Shigure react to her? All too quickly Hatori stopped the car in front of Shigure's house.

"We should enter in the back way so we don't run into the others. We need to get right to Shigure," Hari ordered as he opened the car door for Nami.

"Uh sure," Nami was too worried to notice how much of a gentleman Hatori was.

Hari knocked on Shigure's door, "can I come in now Shigure?"

"No," his voice was so worn Nami almost didn't recognize it, "go Hatori."

Nami couldn't stand to let him suffer any longer. She had to see him for herself. When she opened the door she was shocked to see Shigure's kimono draped even more dramatically than before. Had he lost weight?

"I thought I said to…" Shigure was stopped in his tracks when he pulled his hand from his face, "Nami I…"

Nami put up her hand, "Shigure don't say another word. I am such a stupid insolent little bitch you should never talk to again. I got so caught up with myself and my worries I didn't talk to you."

"Why couldn't you talk? What was so bad you couldn't trust me?"

"Shigure I trust you with my life and that is the problem. I love you so much I couldn't stand the thought of losing you. I went inside Sohma house I didn't just drop Aya off. When I was leaving I ran into some guy. I think his name was Akito…anyway he told me how much trouble I caused you and the pain I was putting you in. I got so upset because I wasn't even brave enough to ask you if it was true. I thought you might say it was and wouldn't want to talk to me. I never wanted to hurt you, but I couldn't stand the risk of losing you."

"You went into Sohma house and saw Akito?"

"Yeah. Aya told me I should come in because if he got sick he wanted someone to be there with him. Well then he runs ahead of me and decides to play a dirty trick of pretending to strip all of his clothes and disappear. I was running around like a lunatic there with his clothes. I am sure your family must think I am some kind of pervert. Anyway I luckily ran into Hari and he calmed me down and got this pet snake out of my shirt. After all that Aya showed up like nothing had happened."

"What did Akito say?"

"Well he told me I caused you pain because you went out of your way to protect me. I was really worried that was the reason you didn't take me to your house from the whole time I knew you was because you thought it was dangerous there. Then, I thought you were getting hurt even worse there when you met me because your family didn't approve, but you also didn't want me to know and were trying to protect me. I didn't want to make you choose between me and your family, but I thought once you might," Nami was shaking praying she hadn't hurt him too much where he would stop talking to her.

Shigure let their foreheads touch and wrapped his fingers in her hair, "Nami you will always be my friend no matter what. I will never abandon you. I am sorry Akito lead you on to believe so. I didn't take you to my house because things are complicated there. I am not getting hurt. It's just…there are some very jealous people there that don't approve of any outside interaction when certain people try to integrate with the rest of the world. They can be very overprotective. I am one of those people they want to protect and to bring a friend in would just be rubbing it in their face. Believe me though I won't abandon you."

"So the boys at your house are facing the same treatment, but you want them to be able to live like you couldn't for so long except for the few nights with me."

"Right."

"Why only certain people? I don't get it. I mean I know your family must be rich and all but why keep certain people as prisoners and the others not?"

"The luck of the draw I suppose."

"Thank you Shigure for explaining it to me. I am sorry I didn't ask earlier, but I had been worried about this for so long. It…it makes sense now."

"Nami thank you for all those nights of freedom you gave me. I wouldn't be the person I am today without that. I don't know if I am strong enough to go on without you."

"What you're saying is that I am the one who changed you into a pervert who looks to get in high school girl's pants? Nami was finally able to laugh.

"Nami you're cruelty shows no bounds."

"Apparently yours doesn't either! You look like you have been rejecting all of Tohru's delicious cooking?"

"Yes well I will be making up for all the times I missed! By the way you threw your voice to sound exactly like Hari's. That was impressive!"

Hari stepped in the room, "she didn't throw her voice I'm here. Now because of the way you have been moping around you need a check up."

"Nami you lied to me! You made up all of your worries, but really you were just with Hatori the whole time enjoying yourself weren't you?" Shigure tugged on her sleeve.

Nami dramatically threw up her hands, "you caught me red handed."

Shigure rubbed his chin with a sly smile plastered across his face, "I don't blame you Hari. Nami does look especially cute today in her itty bitty skirt. Wearing something like that just makes it too easy."

"I am going to shove this needle in the most painful spot possible. Is that alright with you Nami?" Hatori pulled out a mammoth needle.

"That sounds perfect," Nami laughed as she left the room. Those two did need some private time.

Nami was about to go outside and enjoy the brisk winter air when her stomach growled, "shhh! I just ate a little bit ago."

"Are you hungry?" Tohru's chipper voice was unmistakable.

Nami jumped, "oh I didn't know you were over there. Don't bother with me I am fine really."

"No it's the least I can do. It is you who was able to cheer up Shigure after all when none of us could. You really must mean a lot to him."

"I guess though I can't picture why."

"Well it's probably because you were the first person outside of his family to accept him. I have only known the Sohma's a little while now but as charming as they are they really are afraid of how others view them. It's like they don't know that everyone admires them."

"I guess that's hard for anyone to see though, Tohru you really are too cute to be around Shigure."

"Don't worry Tohru has Yuki and Kyo remember?" Hatori appeared from behind.

Nami furrowed her brow, "why is it that you always like to sneak up on me like that?"

"You are…cute when you're scared," Hatori looked right through Nami.

Nami luckily didn't have to respond to that one when Tohru piped up, "Hatori you will be joining us for dinner too right?"

"I am Nami's ride home so if she is I suppose I'll have too," Hatori commented nonchalantly.

"Well I better be off and make it then! Please make yourselves at home," Tohru bowed before she raced off into the kitchen.

Nami crossed her arms at Hatori, "who says you're taking me home?"

"I just did," Hari stepped outside to light a cigarette.

Nami stamped after him, "oh no you're not getting away that easily! Why can't I walk myself home? I have a strong pair of legs!"

"After not being able to walk a few hours ago I doubt you have the strength yet to walk as far as your apartment is. Even if you could it will be dark by the time we eat so there is no way you are going by yourself through these woods and the city. I will not allow Shigure to drive anything so I am left driving you."

"Well you don't have to sound like it's such a chore."

"I don't think that at all," Hatori let out a long sigh of smoke.

Nami turned away so she wouldn't let Hari she her face. Did he even know how he could be? "I'm going for a walk in the woods."

"I'll join you," Hari walked to her side.

"I guess I've found a duckling. I don't want to have to wait around because you smoke so much."

"I don't want to have to carry you home because of your negligence but that is probably what will end up happening."

Nami rolled her eyes, "ugh. Let's just go!"

The winter brought such stillness in the woods. The only sound to be heard was the crunching of their feet beneath the snow. It really was lovely. The way the sun glimmered on the snow made it brighter for a litter longer. Nami found the peak of a cliff and went to the very edge to look far in the distance.

"From heights like these it's like you can see everything. Like you own the world," Nami thought aloud.

Her moment of perfection was broken with the earth shaking beneath her feet crumbling in itself Hari leapt toward her, "Nami!"

One moment Hari was hurtling toward Nami with the full impact of his solid body pushing her away from the landslide into safety, and the next was just very confusing. It must have only been seconds that passed but Hari was not on top of her like she expected when someone crashes into a person. Instead some smoke was clearing and he had vanished.

"Hari?" Nami called searching everywhere until she noticed his cloths on the ground.

She picked them up and noticed a tiny sea horse within them, "oh my…Hari? You're a seahorse. That means you must be freezing since they're coldblooded. Oh no can you breathe? I need water…wait salt or fresh!"

Nami scooped Hari and his clothes up following the footprints she left behind back toward Shigure's. When she ran into his room frantic, "Shigure is it…"

She ran into him too, and all of the sudden there was a puff of smoke and a black dog appeared before her. What drugs did Hari slip in her ramen?


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for all my dedicated readers! As I have said before I love reviews and I have to thank Princess de la Luna, Kassandra203, Dark Angel 792, my-forgotten-rose, MetalAndLovingIt, and roomofangels for the reviews. Thanks to everyone who watches and favs this and anyone who has read this at all. I hope you enjoy!

5

Just as Nami was about to reach the apex of her freaking out there was another large poof and seahorse Hari was now just an unconscious Hari on the floor. It took a moment for Nami notice that he was stark nude, and continued freaking out making her drop his clothes.

"He's naked! Shigure put some clothes on him I don't care if you are a dog," Nami cried.

"Alright," he sighed dragging the jacket to cover Hatori.

Nami blinked and sat down to look at him in the eyes, "so you can talk in this form too?"

"You're not surprised I'm a dog?" Shigure cocked his head.

Nami threw herself around his neck, "no you are super cute!"

When she let go Shigure looked away, "I…"

Before Shigure could finish his thought he transformed back standing right in front of Nami stark nude. She buried her head in her hands, "please change so I can talk to you, and you can explain what the hell is going on."

"Alright I am changed. Let's first get out of this room so I can explain everything without bothering Hari. He must've taken a good bump to the head. What happened?"

"We went hiking in the woods and were overlooking the scenery from a cliff when there was a landslide beneath me so Hari jumped into me so I wouldn't get killed. I guess I know now why you would never hug me. It's a secret right?"

"It's actually a curse."

"Are you in pain when you transform or…"

"Not like that. You see it's a curse because we can never associate ourselves with outsiders fully like a normal person could. When I say we I mean my families curse is that thirteen of us take on an animal from the Chinese zodiac. You saw I was the dog and Hari is the dragon. When we are embraced by the opposite sex or our bodies are under a great deal of stress we transform. Once we transform back we are naked as you saw."

"So the select few in the family that are protected over are the zodiac right?"

"That's right."

"So nobody outside of the family is supposed to know right?"

"Yes no one."

"What happens if they do?"

"That is up to Akito to decide. He's the head of the family and bears the full burden of the curse."

"What do you think could happen?"

"Well this isn't unprecedented. Our own Tohru knows about this and is not part of the Sohma's. Akito was very generous to her and nothing really changed for her."

"Was there more besides her?"

"Yes. Nami please tell me honestly. I want you to be happy you know that."

"Gure what is it? You know I am always honest with you."

"What did you think when you saw us change like that?"

"Hrrmmm well when I first saw Hatori change I thought he slipped me some really strong drugs. Then I realized that seahorses were cold blooded and I should keep him warm…the breathing thing came later and I was debating if I should put him in salt water or fresh water. Then, I wondered how I would make salt water. I ran into you and you tuned into a dog and I wondered again if I was dreaming, but didn't think I was since I was sore from falling over. When you talked it confirmed that it was really you and I thought you were pretty adorable. Oh then I was really glad I got your animal personality right…."

"Well now that you have some time to soak everything in what do you think?"

"Uhhhh I think I should hug you more often because you are really cute as a dog and I could have a pet without having to take care of it."

"You're not repulsed or afraid?"

"You're still the same Shigure. What does it matter if you can turn into a dog? Wait!"

"What?"

"There is a year of the snake isn't there…"

"Yes."

"I AM GOING TO KILL AYAME THAT STUPID PERVERT!" Nami stamped around the room.

Yuki opened the door, "I don't know why you hate my brother all of the sudden but I am sure he deserves it. If you need any help please don't hesitate to call on me."

With that Yuki left and Shigure started laughing. Maybe he went off the deep end Nami wasn't sure, "Gure you okay?"

"I don't know if I have ever been so happy in my life," he couldn't control himself.

"What's so funny? I don't get it."

"I have nothing to hide from you anymore. You know my deepest secret and are not repulsed or even phased. It's better than anything," Shigure's laughing was cut short when Hari came in the room. Nami was about to go out and greet him but Shigure pulled her behind him.

Hatori sighed, "don't worry I haven't gotten any orders."

"But you'll tell him," Shigure murmured.

"Only if you don't," Hatori was fixing his tie.

"Dinner is ready!" Tohru peeked her head in the room until she realized how tense it was, "I didn't mean to interrupt."

"No, no you're not interrupting anything. Nami was just telling me how excited she was to get to eat your food again. Unfortunately Hari and I…" Shigure was cut off.

"Were even more excited to eat," Nami finished the sentence, "we wouldn't miss your cooking especially Shigure. I know he's starving. You're hungry too right Hari?"

"Yes let's eat," Hari walked out of the door.

Once Tohru and Hatori left Shigure shot Nami a dirty look, "I have business to discuss with him."

"Shigure please you need to take care of yourself. You haven't eaten in forever. Whatever you need to discuss can be done in front of me too. I mean you did tell me everything right?"

"Well…"

"I knew it! What happens if Akito doesn't approve?"

Shigure sighed, "I won't let that happen. Let's go."

The younger generation was eating happily. Yuki and Kyo got in a small tiff, but that seemed to be normal based on Tohru's laughing. Shigure was acting like his normal self to the best of his ability. Nobody commented on how Shigure had been gone from their life this entire time. It was like they decided to tune out the whole commotion that happened. Nami caught Yuki and Kyo staring at her briefly with sad eyes. They must have known the whole weight of the situation. Still Tohru seemed blissfully unaware of anything. They probably wanted it that way…their light in the darkness.

After dinner Yuki and Kyo offered to take Tohru out to a special place. She was so excited, but wanted to do the dishes first. They managed to convince her to come out with them by using the Sohma charm. Poor girl didn't know what hit her and she was out the door in no time.

"So what do I have to do now that I know?" Nami asked both of them.

"You will do nothing," Shigure stood, "I will take care of everything and you will just keep being yourself."

"Shigure I am not letting you fight my battles for me," Nami looked him in the eye.

"It's my family I will know how to deal with them. Trust me on this," he was starting to beg.

Nami shook her head, "I can show up with you and let you do the talking. I just don't want you to be there alone. Would it help if Hari was with us?"

"No!" Shigure hit his hands on the table, "please let me deal with this."

"Shigure if you won't let me come and deal with this too I will go down there and tell Akito myself right now," Nami leaned forward.

"You wouldn't," he gasped.

"I would! If I have to break out of this house and call the cops and tell them you are trying to hold me here against my will I would," Nami's voice softened, "Shigure you are not alone in this world. You don't have to fight my battles for me. Please, I want to come and determine my own future as well."

"Fine," it sounded if he just gotten the worst jail sentence.

"When are we going?" Nami rubbed his back.

"Tomorrow morning," Hatori finally spoke up, "Shigure you will pick Nami up from her apartment at 7:45 and I want you to be at the main house by 8am. I will meet you in Akito's room."

"Are you so eager Hatori?" Shigure used his full name he really was angry.

"Of course not. You know that. I think it would be best if I am there as well in case he loses his temper," Hatori explained rationally.

Shigure fell as if he were beaten, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't snap. I just…ugh. Out of the pot into the frying pan."

"Nami and I should be heading home. We have an early call tomorrow. Get some sleep Shigure and make sure you look presentable," Hatori instructed as he was walking out dragging Nami along.

Hari started the car and it leapt to life. He didn't give Shigure a chance to come out and say goodbye though Nami doubted he could. They sat in silence for a while until Nami mustered up some courage, "why is Shigure afraid of you all of the sudden?"

"He didn't tell you? Interesting" Hatori thought aloud.

"Tell me what?"

"When there are outsiders that learn of our secret the situation must be corrected. That means memories have to be erased. I am the only one who can do that job. If Akito gives the orders I must do it no matter what pain it causes."

"Why do you have to do everything he says? What if he is wrong?"

"That is the nature of our curse."

"I won't lose my memories."

"I don't want you to either."

"No I won't Hatori. If Shigure flipped out that much because he wasn't sure if everything was alright between us can you imagine what would happen to him if I wasn't there at all? He would still remember everything."

"I am aware."

"Not only that but what would it do to you?"

"You are here. Please be sure to wear your nicest clothes and be on time tomorrow. Akito gets very irked if he has to wait," Hatori opened the door again.

"Hari don't worry. I am not gonna let Akito win over me that easily. Everything will be alright," Nami gave her bravest smile before leaving.

With all of the anxiety of tomorrow it was hard for Nami to conceive of sleeping. Still once her head hit the pillow after the stress of today and knowing there would be even more tomorrow sleep found her in no time at all. Morning came and Nami tried to think of something to wear. How nice did she have to be? Black trousers, a green top, and a matching black jacket was what she decided to go with. Almost as soon as she was done getting ready she had a knock on her door.

Shigure stood there oddly serious in a full blown suit with his hair slicked back and Nami let herself smile, "you really do look handsome in that you know. What are people not allowed in your family unless they meet a certain standard of outward beauty?"

"Thanks," he sighed, "we should be going."

Nami saw Shigure almost like an older brother now, but he had never been touchy feely type. Nami understood why now, but that wouldn't break her habit of keeping her physical distance from him. It shocked her when he took her hand and they walked together. People must have thought they were an important business couple with the way they were dressed. Shigure even squeezed her hand when they stood feet away from where Akito must have been waiting.

With another breath Shigure guided Nami in through the door into the dark plain room. He stood in front of her like he was trying to protect her from something. How badly did Akito treat everyone? Hatori was already in the room sitting before him.

"Ahh Shigure you already arrived," Akito's voice dripped with something rotten, "and you brought the guest of honor. Please have a seat."

Shigure bowed and took a seat, "thank you Akito. I know your time is precious so may I skip the formalities and tell you exactly why we are here? The girl behind me name is Nami, but I believe you two have already met."

"Yes we have…" Akito trailed.

"To be frank she found out our secret," Shigure managed. He even seemed too scared to say much else.

"It was really my fault," Hatori interjected.

"How so?" Akito pressed.

"We were out at Shigure's house and Nami and I were taking a walk in the woods. We reached a high cliff and there was about to be a landslide. The only way to save her was push her out of the way," Hatori explained calmly.

"I let my guard down," Shigure confessed, "I heard her frantic and she ran into me when she was carrying Hari. I transformed before her as well. I couldn't try to cover it up so I explained everything to her. How our curse is a secret she must keep. I was wondering if she would be allowed to keep her memories?"

Akito let a long pause hang in the air as he looked at Shigure bent and beaten, "I don't think she will. If she is not strong enough to stay away from you and will continue to cause all this pain then I will take matters into my own hands. I won't allow her to hurt you anymore Shigure."

Nami couldn't contain herself and stood up, "Akito you can't!"

"Why not?" He strode casually over toward her taking her face into his hands.

"Shigure needs me and I need him. I tried staying away but that almost killed both of us doing it. Shigure is like an older brother to me. If you were to take my memories away from me it would end up hurting him more than anything. Shigure and Hatori may be bound to you but I am not. I have to show you you're wrong!" Nami let the words flow uncontrollably from her mouth.

Akito threw Nami into the ground and started choking her, "you think you know what is best for my family? Just because you learn about our secret doesn't mean anything."

"Don't hurt her Akito," Hatori pleaded as he pulled him off of Nami.

"I am sure you know more about the curse than me. You live with it every day. I know Shigure and I don't ever want to stop knowing him or Aya or even Hatori. I know you feel like I drove a wedge in your family but I never meant to do that. I would do anything to keep my memories," Nami caught her breath in Shigure's arms.

Akito relaxed in Hatori's arms, "anything? Alright you can keep your memories under one condition; you have to live here at Soma house. Since nobody else would offer I will kindly take you under my wing. Shigure of course you will be welcome to come and see her at any time here."

"Akito…" Shigure was about to protest.

Hatori cut him off, "as sick as you get I wouldn't want you troubling yourself over a guest Akito. Why doesn't Nami stay with me instead? I am sure if Shigure wants to visit and makes the journey over here he will visit you too."

Akito's face soured, "fine. But she must keep our secret and is not allowed to leave unless she is going to work or is with another member of the zodiac. She will be moved in by the end of tonight. Everyone leave I want to be alone."

Shigure and Hatori bowed and even thanked Akito for his time. Nami left without a word and turned her back on him. She wanted to keep living life as it was and not become a prisoner of Akito's, but it seemed as if there was no other way to keep her memories and she refused to hurt them like that.

Once they got out of eyesight from Akito's building Hatori turned toward both of them, "let's go to my office. I think we have a few things to talk about."

Nami knew she was going to get a tongue lashing from Shigure for being so rash. Hatori she couldn't read. Still she couldn't help but sense that they were both relieved, and that was because she wouldn't have to lose her memory. Nami would have to keep that in her mind no matter what they would say. There was no way she would put either of them through that.

It was funny how Hatori's office seemed so close when Nami didn't want to get there. Hatori fell back into his chair and started rubbing his eyes. Shigure decided to stand and Nami would not be the one to sit on the floor like a child so she stood on the far corner of the room. She fixated her eyes on the scenery waiting for them to initiate the conversation. What could she say?

Shigure broke the silence, "Nami I don't think you understand what you are getting yourself into. It's not like Akito will let you leave Sohma house very often. All the freedom you had worked so hard to get so that you could be away from your own family will mean nothing. It will be harder to give up after having freedom for so long."

"What other option did I have then Shigure?" Nami challenged.

"To forget," Shigure's eyes dropped, "it doesn't hurt you. You could still be happy."

"No that's not acceptable," Nami walked up to Shigure and put her hand on his shoulder, "you really are like a brother to me Gure. You would still have to live with all those memories we would have once share and see me occasionally at work. How could I live with myself knowing the pain I would cause you?"

"You wouldn't know the difference."

"I would before everything happened. I think I would know something was wrong subconsciously. Plus it's not like I am only doing this for your sake. I can't imagine being happy in the world without having you in it. My life would be dreadful. You know I don't make friends easily. I would probably be a hermit. This is my decision Shigure and I am not going back on it. I think it is the silliest reason to erase my memory just because I found out another thing about you. It's not like anything has changed or I'm repulsed or something crazy like that."

"It's not that crazy," Hari injected, "mother's of their own children can't handle the transformation. It's actually common for that to happen. The mother becomes overly protective or rejects their child completely once they find out."

"Have you ever had to erase a mother's memory?" Nami stood astounded.

"Yes," Hari was looking in the distance, "it's just hard to believe that someone, much less an outsider, could handle the transformation so easily."

"Maybe you all make it a bigger deal than it needs to be. Like you attached an unnecessary stigma to it or something," Nami shrugged, "well can you help me move? I really don't feel like pissing Akito off more today."

Nami walked stood at the doorframe as the two Sohma's shared a glance with each other before they left not sure how tomorrow would fair.


	6. Chapter 6

Hey Guys once again I must apologize for updating a day late. Yesterday I had my last throng of finals but now I am in winter break so we should be on time! Yay! I hope this was worth the wait. I love reviews and my readers!

6

Nami let out a long sigh after moving in the final piece of furnisher into the Sohma residence. Shigure stood in the middle of the room looking around trying to believe where he was standing. Every once in a while she would catch him stealing a glance at her and then go back gaping at the room. Hatori seemed very natural in the environment. Was there anything that could make him lose his cool?

"I must apologize for not having a more spacious room for you," Hari stood where he was.

Nami spun around toward him, "no not at all! Thank you so much for having me. I really owe a lot to you."

"We must thank you really Nami for the sacrifice you have to make our lives easier. Know that if you ever change your mind we won't hold it against you," Shigure jumped in the conversation.

Nami rolled her eyes, "you can be quite the idiot can't you Shigure. Or you are trying to get rid of me, but that isn't gonna happen so you will have to learn to live with it. Now you should get back. It's getting late and I am sure Mi is dying to get your fully finished manuscript that she gave you an extension on."

"You know I didn't finish it yet," Shigure laughed with an impish smile.

Nami glanced away, "why are you such a pathetic failure at life? Will you never try to achieve and strive to be anything more? I guess I shouldn't expect more of my dearest friend, and I will always be associated with a complete failure."

"You can be quite ruthless when you want to be," Shigure whimpered.

Nami lit up, "so you will go home early and finish your manuscript and be the responsible adult for the children you have in your house right?"

"Fine I'll go out in the cold and travel all the way home by myself. I will be fine don't worry about me," Shigure made only inched toward the door as he said his whole speech.

"Of course you will go home alone in the cold unless you want me to leave Nami here alone right after her tiff with Akito," Hari sounded genuinely upset.

"My dearest friends," a shrill voice called, "please no more fighting I will take perfect care of Nami so Shigure doesn't have to go in the cold by his lonesome.

Aya made a grand appearance in the room holding onto Nami, "Shigure would never be able to go alone, and I would gladly go over to him, but if I go to his home I am liable to never leave. At least not until the night is through."

"Are you and Shigure connected and you know when to back him up on his antics?" Nami looked up to Aya.

"Fine I will take Shigure out so your voice doesn't keep grating on me. I would get no peace here as it is," Hatori turned to Nami, "please make yourself comfortable here and put Aya to work."

Nami nodded, "of course what else is Aya good for?"

Hari and Shigure walked out of the room and already Nami could see their whole bodies tense; not only that they started talking quite seriously toward each other. Before Nami could worry about what they were talking about and what they were leaving her out of Aya's presence had to become known.

"Oh Nami I can't tell you how excited I am to have you staying with us! Although you with Hatori…how scandalous. I can expect such actions from you but Hari…" Aya blathered on.

"Aya do you always have to think of such ridiculous things? That is something you would do not me," Nami was unfazed by Aya's attempt to get a rise out of her.

Aya's face melted into something more serious as well, "I almost wish you two were romantic. Both of you could really use it, but Hari seems to be impossible."

That caught Nami's attention, "why? What happened to Hari?"

"Do you remember how you picked me up to bring me back to Sohma house, and we were teasing you about dating Hari which was surprising?"

"Yeah."

"Well Hatori almost got married a few years ago."

"Almost? What happened?"

"He fell in love with a girl named Kana. She started out as a doctor in training, but she managed to brighten up Hari's world. Make him a little less cold, and she melted his icy heart. For a while Hatori was in bliss. It didn't take too long for Kana to find out the curse, but she wasn't upset by it either. Hari proposed to her and she accepted, and the only step left was to ask for Akito's approval. He didn't take the information too well and threw pottery at Hari which made him almost completely blind in his left eye. Akito told Kana it was all her fault that Hari was hurt and I think you know how convincing he can be. Kana couldn't look at Hari without crying and she wasn't getting better. The only thing that Hari could do for Kana is to erase her memories. It was like nothing had ever happened between the two of them, at least not to her. So Hari is left here occasionally hearing about how the girl he loved is living her life."

"I can't even imagine how much pain he must go through…every day."

"I had to thank you so much for not forcing his hand like that again. You know Gure couldn't take it and seeing someone else I love suffer would be too much. Nami I promise it won't be so bad," Aya's eyes were unwavering toward Nami.

Nami smiled since she couldn't hug him, "of course Aya. I would never put any of you through that. I wouldn't want to lose my best friends. Plus can you imagine what I would be like without you? I would be a complete hermit! Well I think it is about time I put you to work to unpacking all of my crap."

Nami spent most of the time getting settled in while Aya flitted around mostly distracting her from her work. With all the distractions it felt like no time when Hari came back. He told Aya to leave to give some peace after a long day and then Nami was really alone with Hari. She tried not to stare in wonder at how he kept such an even composure.

"Is there something you need to say?" Hari noticed the unwavering gaze.

Nami looked down and blushed, "no, no not at all. I just…I just wanted to thank you for doing this. I know I must be an inconvenience, but I will try to stay out of your hair. Don't change any of your routine because of me ok? That being said what can I do to repay you for your hospitality?"

"Just make yourself comfortable and stay as you are."

"Please there has to be something…I know I could clean and cook for you like Tohru does for Gure."

"I have been doing both for a long time it is quite alright."

"Come on I need to do that and it's the least I can do. Oh by the way how much is rent?"

"Excuse me?"

"Well I am living in your space. Cleaning and cooking was just an option to thank you for all the extra trouble."

"You are as stubborn as Shigure."

"I will figure something out if you won't tell me," Nami laughed and that petered out once she glanced over at her stack of charcoal drawings.

Hari cocked his head slightly, "what is wrong?"

"Oh nothing at all."

"You are a terrible liar."

"It's just…it's the first time since I have been a professional novelist that I missed a morning to go out and draw. I will just have to get more creative than just drawing from observation."

"Why don't I show you around the estate? I wouldn't want you catching a cold in this weather because you don't know your way around," Hari lead the way out of his warm house.

The estate still seemed dead which surprised Nami, "is it always so quiet around here?"

"Well the area you got lost in is in the center of the estate and where I…we live is there too. I think when we get more of the edge is when you will find more activity and youth. Akito likes the quiet around him," Hari fit perfectly into the stoic scenery, "I think you will find when it comes to be New Years that everything is quiet lively around here. The whole Sohma family gets together for a few days, but the members of the zodiac celebrate in a different place for them for a while and reenact the banquet."

"That must be so much fun! It would be a great time for you all to really get the chance to bond with each other," Nami smiled trying to imagine what kind of festivities would go on.

Hari was silent for a moment and looked distant so Nami cocked her head, "is something wrong?"

"You're going to be stuck in the house while the celebration goes on around you. All because you're not a Sohma," Hari's voice broke its perfect even tone.

"Hari," Nami stood before him, "don't worry about that. I always stay in on New Years. I am really pathetic friend wise so Gure would always go every year, but every New Year I start off ahead on my work load!"

"Hatori!" a lighthearted voice warmed the frigid winter air.

Nami looked away from Hatori's serious face and saw the blonde boy she remembered was Momiji. Momiji stopped and for a moment and looked at Nami and an even bigger smile leapt on his face, "oh you're Nami right? I remember you. Hari why are you with her?"

"You really know how to ask a lot of questions don't you? Nami will be staying with me for a while," Hari patiently explained.

Momiji did not try to hide his shock, "you two are living together? Ohh Hari!"

"I am housing her because she found out about the secret and she did not want to lose her memories. Akito thought it would be best for her to stay at the Sohma estate, and I offered to house her. I was just showing her around the estate," Hari turned to Nami, "not everyone in the Sohma family knows about our secret. In fact, almost no one knows besides the zodiac themselves and their immediate family. So please don't assume that because they are a Sohma they know about the secret. I can speak so freely because he is a member of the zodiac."

"That's right! Guess which one I am," Momiji danced around Nami and Hatori.

Nami placed her hand right below her chin, "hrrmmm…well you are very energetic and adorable. I am going to say you are the rabbit."

"You're so good at this! So who did you find out the secret from?" Momiji kept up with the constant questions.

"Well Hari actually. We were walking in Shigure's woods and there was a landslide right beneath me so he pushed me out of the way and then poof! I freaked out and tried to take him to Shigure, but since I was so worried I ran into Shigure and then there was even more of a problem," Nami couldn't help but thinking about the chaotic time, "it really is funny how surreal it all feels."

"Well I am glad you got to keep your memories! We will get to see a lot of each other if you are staying with Hari cause sometimes Hari watches me!" Momiji swished back and forth.

"Speaking of watching," an unfamiliar voice called from the distance and a boy with black and white hair appeared, "you shouldn't run off so much in this weather."

"Haru are you watching Momiji?" Hari sounded just the slightest bit surprised.

"No we were just coming back from school and started to walk around the Sohma house. I lost sight of him for a moment and of course I went looking after him…." Haru started to explain.

Momiji cut him off, "Haru got lost looking for me!"

"Well both of you should go back and get to your school work you surely have," Hari chastised.

"Before I was introduced to the lady next to you?" Haru had a very polite demeanor.

Hari gave a slight sigh, "this is Nami. She found out about our secret and Akito thought it would be best if she stayed on the estate and I offered to take her in."

"Ahh well it was very nice to meet you. I am Haru, and I am entering my first year of high school this spring," Haru bowed.

"That's interesting...I didn't think that the school would be very pleased with that hair style," Nami thought aloud.

"It's my natural color," Haru sighed.

"Oh?" Nami murmured, "then what is your excuse for the piercings?"

Hari let out a short chuckle, "come on now Nami we should be off to see more of the estate. I wouldn't want to freeze by staying out here so long. Boys you have gotten out of your school work long enough."

Hari lead Nami around the rest of the estate, and she hoped that she could remember all the places and how they connected with one another. Once they got back to the house Nami relished in the warmth even more, "hey Hari where do you keep your tea? I want to brew some for us."

Hari walked over to the kitchen and took the teapot from her, "I will do it please don't feel like you have to wait on me."

"I don't. I wanted tea so I should be the one to brew it," Nami tried to reach around Hari before he set the pot on the stove, but there was just too much of him to get around.

Nami pouted once he put the pot on the stove, but she consoled herself with the fact that there would have to be someone to get the pot off of the stove and actually pour the tea. She could beat Hari to that. They both took a seat at the table as they waited for the teapot to whistle.

A shiver of Nami adjusting to the warmth ran up her spine, "I love the snow."

"Is that so?" Hari leaned on his elbow.

"Yeah. It makes the air so crisp and fresh. It takes away all of the impurities and just simplifies everything, and makes everything beautiful."

"Beautiful. It is stark and unfeeling. The snow is what makes people sick."

"Ah, but winter would come without the snow either way. Without the snow there would just be cold air and grey skies, but the snow brings forth its honest self and just by being snow makes winter bearable, and even beautiful."

"You really believe that?" Hari sounded as if he were smiling inwardly.

"Of course," Nami heard the teapot whistle and jumped right to the stove and she turned around and stuck her tongue out at Hari, "got it before you. I win."

"You know where the cups are?" Hari kept perfect composure.

Nami's huffed, but she refused to ask for help. She started to look through the cabinets. Hari slid around her and pulled out the cups and poured the tea before Nami noticed. It was only until Hari called her, "your tea is getting cold over here."

Nami looked up, "how did you do that?"

Nami sighed but decided to sit down and just appreciate the kindness. She knew there would be more opportunities to get back at him. Hari started the conversation again, "you know what snow's downfall is. With the slightest change it fades away. It can't withstand anything."

"Wrong yet again Hari! The snow may change with the warmth, but it never leaves, It just becomes nourishing rain. Snow is very versatile and can change when the time is appropriate. Until then the snow preserves and keeps safe everything it needs too," Nami sipped at her tea.

There was a comfortable silence between the two before Nami spoke up again, "you know what the snow also does? There is a extraordinary silence that follows it. Everything is becomes so peaceful."

"You really like to defend and point out all of the good things about snow. Are you so vehement about every natural element?" Hari wondered.

Nami laughed, "not really. I just don't like you being so negative. There is always a bright side to things. You seem to manage yourself quiet well, but the fact that you let this get under your skin well it must mean something to you. I just wanted to point out it is not so bad."

"Maybe I just like to see your banter."

"Maybe. Or maybe you secretly can't stand to lose. Either way we were entertained and got some interesting conversation right?"

"Sure," Hari nodded and looked like he wanted to say more but his beeper interrupted his train of thought, "I am sorry to break this, but I have some work to attend to."

"Akito?" Nami stood as she handed him his jacket.

"Yes. It shouldn't be too long before I come back. Please make yourself comfortable," Hari said before the outdoors engulfed him and Nami was left alone in the house.

Nami hated Hari going to Akito. She hated the thought of anyone going to him. All Akito looked to do was look to make everyone as miserable as him. Nami walked through the strange house and tried not to think of her old apartment. Tried not to think about how she let Akito keep her prisoner here. She tried not to think about all the happiness and freedom that she left behind in those four walls.

Yet she couldn't help but remember all of the good times. She remembered each visit Shigure and Aya gave her. She remembered how that apartment felt like a safe haven from whatever troubles surrounded them. She thought of that place as a way for Shigure to get away from his troubles she knew now that was because he felt like he could never be normal.

Whatever happiness she felt here would be counterbalanced by the pain Akito would cause her or the people she cared about here. He would always be right there waiting to strike like a viper. She would always be under his reign.

With these thoughts gnawing at her brain Nami couldn't help but become despondent. Hari had warded it off for the time, but when she was left alone…tears streaked her face. There was nowhere to run to like she had with her home. She was stuck with this fate and would have to face it for…forever?


	7. Chapter 7

7

Hari came back home and sighed. He put up his coat and decided to look for Nami to see how she was doing. He found her lying on the table with a tear stained face. How long had she been crying? Did he do something to upset her? He ignored the buzzing questions in his head, and put her to bed. She was rather entertaining as she murmured in her sleep about little nothings.

Bed did sound more appealing than normal and he decided to ignore some work and just get up that much earlier tomorrow. He was sapped of everything today. There was so much stress in the past few days about worrying if he would have to take care of a sick Shigure and having erasing Nami's memories. Now that everything was solved there was nothing more he wanted to do than let sleep overcome him, and for once he actually gave in to his whims.

Nami awoke and at first she was completely puzzled by her surroundings and where she was. With a few more blinks as she looked around yesterday's events hit her all at once. For some reason it all felt like a dream. She didn't remember coming to bed at all though. The last thing she did remember…she was crying?

"Shit," a blush rose quickly to Nami's face realizing she fell asleep crying last night.

She scuttled out of her room and looked for Hari to apologize for falling asleep on his table. Hopefully he didn't have an early call this morning. She checked all around the house, but Hari was nowhere to be seen. The only place she hadn't checked was his room, but he didn't seem to be the type to sleep in so late or lock himself in there for extended periods of time.

Nami tapped on the door lightly just in case he was asleep. When there was no reply Nami poked her head in the door and much to her surprise she saw Hari sleeping soundly huddled under his covers. Nami was about to close the door and let him keep resting when she heard a cough from him. Honestly it could have been a smoker's cough, but she did want to make sure he was alright. She tiptoed to his bedside praying that he would not wake up and saw his flushed cheeks. She sucked in a deep breath and mustered the courage to touch his forehead, and her suspicions were confirmed. It probably was only a cold, but he really shouldn't push himself any further unless he would make it even worse.

Nami crept out of the room and started making tea so that he would have some right when he woke up. She at least knew where that was. She started buzzing around the kitchen to see what Hari kept and what he might like to eat when he was sick. Before Nami could get too frustrated at the sparse kitchen and what that implied about Hari's eating habits the telephone started to ring. She sprinted over to it and picked it up.

A brief moment of silence ensued unsure of how she should greet the other person on the phone, "Dr. Sohma's residence."

"Why didn't Hari answer the phone," Nami could recognize the cold voice from anywhere.

"I am sorry Akito, but he is resting right now. He is a bit under the weather, and I wouldn't want him to get himself sicker or have you catch it so unless it is an emergency could this house call wait?"

"Hari is sick…and can't come?"

"Uh yeah…"

"You will come to me then by yourself. Don't let Hari know where you are going," dial tone was Akito's choice of punctuation.

Nami sucked in a few breaths and tried to calm herself. Despite her best efforts she let a few drops of tea spill from her slight convulsions, as she walked it to his room; luckily her clumsiness did not wake Hari up. She wrote him a note saying:

Hari,

I made you some tea since I heard you coughing. Please don't push yourself too much and try to get some rest. I went to explore the Sohma estate some more today. I won't be gone long!

~Nami

She felt awful deceiving Hari for Akito's sake, but she could not press Akito's patience more than she had already. The only place she could find her way to on the Sohma estate was the last place she wanted to be, Akito's home. Nami slipped off her shoes and knocked on the door.

"Come in," Akito sounded bored.

Nami let the door creak open very slowly and saw Akito playing with a bird. She didn't know what to do or say so she just sat in the front of the room waiting.

Akito got up and stood right over Nami letting his fingers dance across her face, "after I was so kind to you…you do this to me?"

He shoved Nami to the ground and started kicking her in the side, "you are trying so obviously to steal away Hatori from me too? I let you into my home and not even the first day you do these vile things."

Nami caught his foot and managed to gasp, "Hari is sick…he needs…to rest. You'll get…sick too if he…comes over. Please, please let…him get better. You will see…him as soon as possible."

Akito's leg relaxed, "I want Shigure to stay here with me, and not go over to see you until I get Hari back."

"Why don't you call him and ask then?" Nami couldn't help but spit.

Akito kicked her one last time in the side, "everything you have right now is because of me. Remember that."

Nami lay on the floor for and finally caught enough breath to be able to stand. Akito laughed quietly to himself seeing her in the state. Nami turned her back to him and put on her shoes. She realized if she really was on a walk she didn't look nearly cold enough, and she needed a few more minutes to recover and put on her best poker face.

She found a tree to lean against and felt chilled enough go back home. She really would have to take a look around the estate so that she did know where she was going, but that would have to wait until Hari was feeling better.

Nami walked in and saw Hari right at his desk with the door open overlooking the garden, "you have to be joking me. You are not working and have the door open to the frigid air. I mean as a health professional you would not do something that stupid would you?"

"Did you enjoy your walk Nami?" Hari commented to be polite.

"You're acting like I said nothing!" Nami put her hands on her hips.

"As a doctor I know my own limits. I am fine," Hari didn't bother to look up at her.

Her eyes narrowed, "Hatori you are going to make yourself worse with this cold weather and working yourself like this. Take a day off, and unless it is an emergency I am sure everything can wait until tomorrow."

"Don't you have your own work to attend to?"

"You're right I do. I need to make you some leek soup to make you feel better. I will call you when it is ready," Nami let a sly smile crawl upon her lips. She knew how much Hari hated to be waited on.

"You don't have to make me anything," Hari got up and followed her.

Once they reached the warm kitchen Nami spun around to meet him, "ah I am glad you decided to come into the warm kitchen. That is a much wiser decision Hari! Please relax your soup will be ready in just a bit."

"I can't win," Hari sighed, "can I at least cut the leeks for you."

With that Hari got on cutting right next to Nami who worked on making a proper broth. They worked in comfortable silence until Hari's elbow accidently bumped into Nami's sore ribs. A sharp gasp escaped her lips unintentionally and Hari's stupid doctors instincts kicked in right away and he stopped chopping.

"Are you alright?" He turned toward her with a swooping glance that was taking in her whole state.

"Yeah you just surprised me that is all!" Nami laughed ignoring her throbbing ribs.

"Well you wouldn't mind me giving you a quick check up if it is really nothing right? I just want to make sure you didn't twist or hit anything while moving yesterday," Hari thought just as quickly.

"Well I wouldn't normally, but you are the one with a cold and I can't let you work much less on me."

"Who gave the prognosis that I was sick? I don't recall ever saying that I was."

"I don't have a doctorate, but I do know that when someone coughs a lot and has a fever they are sick."

"I might have been convinced if I actually believed that you knew I had a fever."

"Then let me check if you are so sure of yourself."

The two were at a stalemate at trying to prove the other wrong. It didn't help they both had an iron will. Nami sighed and looked over to the pot, "the broth is ready. I will take the leeks and add them. Really Hari please don't worry about me. You did just startle me. I know for a fact that you are sick though."

"How is that?"

"You cough and you are as pale as your doctor's jacket."

"I smoke and it is the middle of winter."

"Ah but that is not the only reason I know you are sick."

"Really enlighten me."

"You never denied that you weren't sick you just tiptoe around the subject," the pot came to a rolling boil and Nami took off the soup and served it into two bowls, "oh and your eating habits must be atrocious with how little you have in your house and how skinny you are."

"Is this how you entertain yourself is by fussing over others needlessly?" Hari sipped on the soup, "at least you make good soup to make up for it."

Nami smiled resisting a laugh lest she make her ribs protest more, "am I so intolerable?"

"I don't know if you want me to answer that," Hari smiled, a true smile, at her, "so what are your plans for today?"

"Hrmm…well making sure you actually rest and writing so Mi doesn't kill me…oh shit!" Nami slapped her forehead.

"What's wrong?" Hari cocked an eyebrow.

Well I realized my editor doesn't know where I live anymore and doesn't have any way of contacting me. I guess I will really have to get with the times and get a cell phone."

"You are out of the times aren't you?"

"Well do you have one? Cause if you did why are your patients calling your home phone?"

Hari's face fell serious and he raised his eyebrow, "how would you know that my patients called here?"

"I…well…" Nami trailed wishing she could eat her words or think of a cover.

"So who was it and how long ago was the call?" Hari stood up already striding toward the doctor bag.

Nami gave up she wanted so badly not to screw things up, "it was this morning while you were asleep and it was Akito. He said it wasn't an emergency and to come when you felt better. I thought it would be good to tell him you were sick."

"No matter what if you get a call and if it is a patient always get me, especially if it is Akito. I don't want to ever have to repeat an incident like this," Hatori's condescending tone was more punishment then the beating from Akito, and he left the house without another word.

Nami didn't want to sit and sulk the whole time so instead she went to work. Making decisions for Hari wasn't fair…he had too much of that coming from Akito already. She would have to formally apologize and just accept that he would be pissed at her for a while. Organizing her thoughts made it much easier to work properly.

For a while she was able to get a lot written, and just as she was getting into the grove of things her door swung open. For a moment Nami's heart dropped thinking Hatori was seriously pissed at her. That was only for a moment because then she heard his voice, "Nami! I have missed you so much it feels like ages since we have seen each other!"

Nami couldn't remember a time when Aya didn't make a grand entrance, "and I thought I was going to get work done today. Aya has it ever crossed your mind to knock. I mean what would it be like if I was changing or something?"

"Oh dear it wouldn't be anything I haven't seen on one of our nightly excursions, but I would be inspired to make another piece for my shop which has been pretty slow so if you wouldn't mind…" Aya drifted close to Nami.

Nami smacked him across his face, "you disgusting pervert!"

"Ah, ah, ah Aya. You should know better than to try to take advantage of Nami before she has had any liquid elixir," Shigure popped up from nowhere.

Nami's eyes narrowed, "Shigure I know for a fact that no matter how inebriated I get I could keep Aya's and your wandering hands away from me."

"Ahh as rambunctious as ever I see," Shigure smiled as if he expected her to change in one day.

"Have you visited with Akito like you promised you would?" Nami asked even though she knew the answer.

"Yes we had a long visit together. He seemed very pleased by it too," to most people Shigure's tone would sound normal, but to Nami it was a bit flat.

"Do you two ever work?" a new voice called from behind.

"Oh Hari I tried to make it into work today, but this weather was just so brutal without a warm body to cuddle up to," Aya slid over to Nami placing a hand on her sore ribs.

Nami sucked in a sharp breath and regretted that reaction as well only adding to the pain she tried poorly to disguise. All three of them focused on her immediately, but Hari's vision was the most piercing. Now he knew she kept something from him twice today. What a great way to start off living with someone.

"Nami are you alright?" Shigure's face flashed to worried.

"I'm sorry Nami I didn't know!" Aya apologized too profusely.

She glanced over to Hari to see if he would say anything to give her away but his face was now unreadable. Shigure noticed how Nami was staring at Hari which prompted him, "Hari you will take a look at it won't you? Nami what happened?"

"Of course I will. What kind of doctor would ignore an injured person," Hari put a little too much emphasis on injured for Nami's taste, "but I don't need help asking questions Shigure. Now I think you both should be leaving to respect Nami's privacy while I look over her. She will need rest afterward and if you two are around you know she will not stop fussing over you no matter what."

"Leave her like this? Hari you have to be kidding me," Shigure lowered his voice dangerously.

Nami put a hand on his shoulder, "Shigure really I am fine. Please let Hari get this done with as quickly as possible so he can get to his real work."

Before Shigure could protest more Aya took him by the hand and started walking toward the door, "Shigure we must let Hari alone with her! Surely you remember the first time you saw our beautiful Nami scantily clad before you. An experience like that should not be ruined by the presence of other jealous men as we are sure to become, and so we must let Hari enjoy this for every ounce of it's worth. Oh Hari you can call us and tell us what the condition is. I won't tease either one of you two about this silly scheme you came up with to get rid of us for some alone time!"

And just like that Nami was left in the kitchen with Hatori. Once they heard the door shut Hari waited another moment just looking at Nami, and then silently turned to walk away. Nami stood baffled for a second until Hari called, "follow me."

How was she supposed to explain this one?


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks for the reviews and the dedicated readers! Have a wonderful New Year!

8

Nami sat in his office as Hari shuffled through his supplies finally finding a stethoscope. He turned toward her with his numb face. She didn't have to see it for too long before he asked her to turn around as the cool stethoscope slithered up her shirt behind her back. She breathed in as deeply as possible which she realized wasn't too deep before pain shot through and sucked in a quick gasp holding it there. She breathed out as instructed, but breathing slowly only made her realize her ache in more detail.

Hari let the stethoscope drop, but his hands remained under the shirt, "please tell me if where I press causes any pain. You must be completely honest with me."

His last sentence cut through her, but then physical pain swelled with his prodding, "ow!"

Hari touched a few more places on her left side and each slight touch jolted Nami's nerves until finally he walked before her, "I am going to have to ask you to take off your shirt so I can see the full extent of damage you have."

Nami tried not to, but she couldn't help but blush when she was stripped down to her bra. Hari's face was nothing but professional of course, except he slip for one moment when his eyebrows lifted.

Nami couldn't help but wonder, "what are you so shocked about?"

"Look at your side," was all he said.

Nami glanced down shocked to see most of her side was filled with deep purple black color splotches, "oh…"

Hari looked up shocked for a moment longer and then regained perfect composure, "now will you tell me how you got this injury?"

"Is this really a part of the diagnostic process?" Nami tried to buy time thinking of something.

Hari looked right at her, "Nami please."

She was tired of lying for Akito of all people so she made her confession, "I had a visit with Akito today."

"Visit? When did he…" Hari trailed for a moment, "he told you to come over when you told him I couldn't go because I was sick."

Nami's silence lay heavy on Hari, "If you really care for my well being like you say you do then please don't visit Akito alone ever again."

"You know I can't promise that Hari. If he were to ever tell me not to tell you and threaten Gure's, Aya's, or your well being or my memories being erased you know I will have to. I will be more careful next time though, and if it is at all within my power I will bring you with me ok?"

"If he ever does this again to you I'll…"

"You know you are under his orders. I am not and so I have to fight for all of you."

"If he ever hurts you again like this I cannot go on ignoring it. I will have to erase your memories."

"Hari! No you wouldn't….no I wouldn't let you."

Hari had tombs in his eyes, "I can't let someone suffer because of me."

Nami remembered what Aya had told her about Kana. About what Hari did. He would erase memories if it meant it would stop suffering no matter how great the cost. It made sense why he was a doctor. Nami realized Akito wanted her to show her wounds to Hari. He knew it would upset him and make him want to erase her memories without him ever having to give the order. Now if he ever called her alone she would only have two choices, deceive Hari or have her memories wiped.

"I have to get you pain medications so that you are able to breathe deeply and avoid pneumonia. Besides that there isn't much else I can do to treat broken ribs I am sorry. The pain should subside after a month or two," Hari was back in complete professional mode.

"What are you gonna tell Gure and Aya about my injury?" Nami's voice was flat.

Hari caught note of her tone, "Nami this is not the end of the world. Please just take me along if Akito calls and this can be avoided. I don't see any reason Akito will have to meet with you alone."

"You never answered my question," Nami pouted.

"I haven't decided yet."

"How about I call them, and you can get to whatever work you need to attend to I have held you up enough for today."

"What are you going to say?"

"Hrmmm I just have to find the balance of the truth and something that won't make them freak out and come back over here."

Hari let a small smile escape, "good luck with that with as overdramatic as they always are."

Nami smiled and got up about to walk out of the door before Hari murmerd, "umm Nami?"

She turned and cocked her head, "yeah?"

"I am glad you feel comfortable, but I think it would be best if you put your shirt back on," Hari held the shirt out.

Nami's face might as well have been crimson when she snatched her shirt away. She didn't hear it for herself, but she would be a lot of money that Hari laughed when she left. Nami's mind quickly floated on though to thinking about who to call first…Aya or Gure.

As much as she wanted to call Aya first since he would dig less into questions he would also want to be the one to tell Shigure and exaggerate the story until Shigure had a heart attack. Nami closed her eyes and let her fingers dial the familiar number.

"Hatori?" Shigure's voice sounded a bit tense.

"Wow you really don't have that many friends if you can guess who is calling you," Nami teased.

"Nami why are you calling?"

"Ouch…your romance with Hari is so strong you don't even want to talk to me. That hurts. But really I am calling cause it really wasn't that big of a deal, and Hari had other work to attend to."

"So what happened?"

"Apparently my ribs were injured, but Hari said he didn't have to do anything to them. My side is bruised so that was the reason I flinched and started all this commotion. Sorry I worried you."

Shigure paused for a moment, "oh well good then."

"What was the pause for?"

"Nothing don't worry about it. I am just relieved that you're ok!"

"Alright well I think I have taken up enough of your time I actually need to work unlike some people."

They said standard farewells and that more than anything left Nami uncomfortable than anything. It was like they were lacking their normal intimacy. Nami called Aya and let him rant and rave about something, but she couldn't even pay attention. Aya let himself off of the phone and Nami was left to herself again.

She really hadn't gotten much work done here since she came and so she got back on it. Right as she was in the middle of a writing jag there was a knock at her door, "come in."

"Sorry to interrupt," Hatori was pulling something out of his bag, "here is your prescription. Make sure to take it once a day and finish the whole thing alright?"

"Sure," Nami nodded, "hey Hari Shigure bought the story I told him."

"That must be a relief right?"

"He knew it was bullshit, but didn't press me. He's never been like that before."

"You've never lived by Akito before. As Akito's closest confidants we know what he is capable of. We know that sometimes it is better to leave things unsaid because finding out could bring much worse consequences."

"He forces you to live in the dark…his prefabricated darkness. I hate…"

Hatori interrupted before Nami could finish the sentence, "I'd better be back to work. I apologize again for the intrusion."

It didn't take long for Nami and Hari to find themselves adjusted and even somewhat comfortable living with each other. They would normally have dinner together and get their bonding time in then. Nami would write most of the day and Hari would do his various house calls or paper work. Nami couldn't eat breakfast with Hatori because she had picked up the habit of drawing him and try to record exactly how his body would react when portraying certain emotions. When Nami told Hari she was going to be doing this he couldn't help but let a bemused smile flash at the thought of being a model for her. Shigure even heard how genuinely happy Nami had gotten and returned back to his normal demeanor. Nami actually enjoyed living with Hatori, and hoped he didn't think she was too much in the way. Funny how three weeks ago she was living on her own, and could feel like a whole lifetime ago.

The phone rang and Nami picked it up, "Dr. Sohma's residence."

"Still picking up Hatori's phones are you?"_ His_ voice made Nami's stomach drop.

"Do you want me to get him for you?" Nami's mouth felt dry.

"No I actually wanted to speak with you."

"Oh ok then. What is it that you needed to tell me?"

"Why don't you come over here? I think speaking on the phone is such an impersonal way to speak with one another. I don't like to be kept waiting," Akito wasn't fond of formal goodbyes and preferred dial tone instead.

Nami hung up the phone and stood looking at the wall when Hari called, "who was that?"

"Akito," Nami's voice was flat.

Hari came over to the kitchen and his stance was stiff, "what did he want?"

Nami looked at his steely expression shocked by how the mention of his name could bring this cold side to him, "for me to go over there."

"Well we should get going then. Akito is not put in the best mood if he has to wait for something he wants," Hatori started striding for the door.

Nami should have protested on him coming. It could really piss Akito off and put him in danger. It might risk her memories and if that was the case…what would she do if Akito gave Hari the order? She would have to leave the Sohma residence that is for sure, but could she ever talk to any of them again? Would she have to abandon them just to keep her memories…would Akito get what he wanted no matter what happened if he were to give the orders? Despite all of those rational reasons that she just thought of the main reason she had Hari come was because she wanted his protection because. Akito really did scare her.

"Nami," Hari's whisper pulled Nami out of mental despair.

She nodded and entered into the barren room the oozed eeriness. Akito gave a long look at Nami, "you decided it would be better to come with someone? You don't want a heart to heart with me?"

"I wanted to come and visit you when I wasn't on call and spend more time with you," Hatori's voice sounded so different than what he used at home.

"I am glad to hear that Hatori, but I haven't talked to Nami in so long upon your request. I think it is only fair that you let me talk to her alone for a while to see how she is doing," Akito let his fingers slither around Hari's face.

Hari could not refuse a request from Akito no matter how much he wanted to do otherwise. So he bowed and said his most formal goodbyes and gave one last look at Nami as if he were apologizing. With the clack of the door closing it felt as though he sealed her fate in here.

Nami tried to keep her voice strong, "so what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?"

Akito had his back to her, "don't you find it interesting that Hari asked me not to see you for all this time. Now why do you think he would do that?"

"Was he concerned that you couldn't have visitors because of your health?"

"No he was worried for your sake. I could tell."

"I wasn't even aware that he asked that until you brought it up now."

"You're tainting Hari now too. You are making him do things he shouldn't have to."

"I did no such thing. He has his own will and makes his own decisions. I can't tell him to do anything. I don't have powers like you do, and I certainly would not abuse them like you do."

Nami knew she should have eaten those words, but she could not help herself when she thought about how Akito would inevitably give the orders to erase her memories. She knew there was pretty much no way she could win in the situation so she might as well say what nobody else could and make Akito hear the truth.

Akito did not take to those words too well and went to try and strike Nami, but she caught his fists and stared him down, "you can't just throw a tantrum because you hear things that you don't like. If this is all that you had to talk to me about then I am leaving now."

Nami let go of Akito when his muscles finally relaxed before she got the chance to walk away Akito spoke up again, "you will come here tomorrow with Hatori at with the start of the New Year's banquet and meet with me immediately. You will stay in a room and have no visitors other than me. You won't get to leave until the festivities are over. If you decide not to listen to me then I will give the orders for your memories to be erased."

Akito turned his back to her after that speech and Nami stormed out of there. She was so consumed with herself and her thoughts that she ran into Hari who was waiting just outside the door.

"Oh sorry Hari I didn't …" Nami trailed seeing a knitted brow and hard expression on Hari's face.

"Do you enjoy getting severe punishment or is it that you get off on people worrying about you?" Hari was openly pissed.

Nami's eyes found the ground all too quickly for her taste, "I just…can we talk about this in your house?"

"You live there too," Hari corrected letting his tone drain slowly of its anger.

They got back to the house in record speed and Nami threw on a kettle and sat at the table where Hari had planted himself, "so say what you need to say."

Hari let out a long sigh and rubbed his temples, "you can't just be so brash with Akito. You have to show him respect. He is the head of the family."

"He needs to hear the truth. Nobody else will tell him he is being an inconsiderate tyrant, and he throws a tantrum like a child so I thought it would be good to give him a reality check."

"How far did it get you? An extended stay with him and a threat of getting your memories erased?"

"You don't have to worry so much about what he will do. I can handle him. He didn't lay a finger on me today!"

"Nami you are going to be with him for three days. You know what he almost did to you and Shigure. How he can get right under your skin within a few minutes. Give him a few days…"

"Hari I didn't know what to expect then, and now I know how Akito likes to get under peoples skin. I won't let him make me believe that you or anyone else doesn't want me because if that was really the case you would act like the normal human beings you are and tell me how you felt."

"Thank you."

Nami couldn't help but look up in shock, "what?"

"Thank you for believing that we would tell you what was wrong. It is a great relief to be thought of as normal because thought your entire life either in this estate or off people sense the difference."

"Nah you are really as boring as the rest of us," Nami winked grateful for the lightened atmosphere.

"Although I am relieved at your common sense," Hari's face darkened again, "I can't help but worry about what you will do to keep yourself preoccupied during that entire time. You will be able to hear everything and knowing you are alone…"

"Why isn't your hair white yet from worrying? It's fine really. I will bring a journal and a pen and it will all be fine. Just make sure to keep Akito as busy as possible if you want to do something for me, and don't tell Aya or Gure about what my situation is. This is the one time of year you get to see your family and I want you to be able to enjoy yourselves for once alright? Now if you don't mind I am getting some sleep and tomorrow you will go off and enjoy the celebration with your family!" Nami waggled her finger.

Hari causally saluted her, "yes ma'am."

Nami soured her face toward him, but when she got to her room she laughed silently to herself. The image of Hari saluting her was too much. She had so many thoughts racing in her mind that were dying to escape, but she was exhausted and knowing that she would be in a less than desirable situation tomorrow made her stock up on sleep now so she could face whatever she had to.


	9. Chapter 9

9

Nami stood hopelessly before her dresser that seemed to have regurgitated all of her clothes in her room. She currently was wearing jeans with a black sweater and a sliver blue pashmina and grey boots although what she wore at the moment could be thrown off at any minute.

A knock at Nami's door made her jump a bit, "yeah?"

"I am sure whatever you picked to wear is fine. We really need to get going to get there early like you wanted," Hari tempted her.

Nami sighed and came out to see Hari looking stunning in his tux, "wow I am really growing suspicious of the Sohmas performing infanticide."

Hari couldn't hide his amusement, "what makes you say that?"

"I really don't think there is an ugly person in your family…so I think you kill off the ones that are born with less than superior looks."

"There is plenty of ugliness within the Sohmas," Hari turned around and started walking away.

Nami sighed and followed him. She was really hoping that her comment would lighten the mood. Hari had been very tense all day and seemed to be growing more with each passing minute. Nami knew that it was her fault he was that way. Hari would be worried about her the entire time when he was supposed to be celebrating with his family he hardly ever gets to see.

When she looked up again she was right in front of the main house. The outside didn't seem to have changed at all from its normal appearance. Nami wondered if they would ever decorate. Hari let himself in and upon entering there were so many different colors and decorations Nami felt like she was drunk the visual stimulus. She didn't have more time to appreciate the rich scenery because Hari continued on down the hall into the depths of the house. What seemed a thousand twists and turns Nami and Hari found Akito changed into a more formal kimono.

"Ah so the guest of honor arrived early," Akito got uncomfortably close to Nami.

Hari stepped very slightly between Akito, "we thought it would be a good idea to bring Nami here before the rest of the guests arrived so she didn't cause too much attention and wonder why an outsider was brought here."

"You know you are the first outsider to ever come into the Sohma New Year's celebration. For such a special event I have the perfect place for you. Hatori you may leave. I expect to see you later tonight though," Akito's eyes squinted together as if he were smiling.

"Of course I wouldn't miss it," Hari shot Nami a glance when Akito turned around, and Hari walked away back from which he came.

Nami's feet were stuck to the floor until Akito called, "this way."

Akito dragged Nami into a completely undecorated part of the house. It didn't even look like it was lived in ever, and there were no furnishings in it to be seen. Akito opened a door to an empty room with no windows or lights.

"You will be staying here for the next three days. Don't worry you won't be completely alone. I will be sure to come and visit you and tell you all of what you are missing. I will even bring surprises for you," Akito shoved Nami into the room and slammed the door, "remember what happens if you come out for any reason."

And like that Nami was left completely alone in a pitch black room. There was no way to tell time or see the hand before her. She rolled her eyes and realized there was no way she was going to get any writing done. There was really nothing she could do but wait for the three days to pass as quickly as possible, and get some serious catch up on her sleep. This punishment felt so childish as if it was a mother saying "go to your room and think about what you have done." She really hoped Akito would be too preoccupied to give her those surprises.

Nami languished in the room for a while wishing for any type of stimulus when she hear the murmurs of life float her way. Had the party just started or was it in full swing and she was just able to hear it? Time was immeasurable and her everything. If there really was nothing after death and one still had their self consciousness she was really not looking forward to it. The party hummed on like a distant city she was ostracized from. Nami tried to feel where she was, and not lose sight that she had a physical being. She was lying down on what felt like hardwood floor. She tapped her fingers against the floor and surprised herself with the sound. Nami noticed her heart beat and the gurgle of the stomach. Most things that were lost on her because she was so distracted with the outside world revealed themselves to her in this diminished state. While paying attention to natural noises made that were usually lost upon here Nami noticed footsteps approaching.

At first the voices were inaudible, but it didn't take long for her to hear Shigure's voice, "I am sorry to take you away from the festivities, but I thought you deserved an explanation."

"For what?" Akito's voice was eerily smooth.

Nami guessed it was Shigure's weight that shifted. It was almost painful how close they were, "well I don't believe you have gotten to see Kyo and Yuki this evening have you?"

"No I haven't had the pleasure. Is Yuki's asthma acting up?" Akito's voice almost sounded genuinely concerned.

Nami realized her eyes were closed and when she opened them she could see silhouettes of the pair against the rice paper. She wanted more than anything to get up and get closer to see if she could see their expressions, and maybe muted colors. They were holding a candle letting the light flicker and sigh in different directions. Nami wanted to move toward the light source and maybe get some visual information, but if Shigure found out that she was here Nami would surely have her memories erased. So she hardly let herself breath she was so nervous.

Shigure seemed to be channeling the same emotion, "no it is not that. Yuki and Kyo thought it would be best to miss the New Year's banquet, and well all of the festivities this year."

"They aren't coming at all…they aren't coming to the banquet. You know they are the first ever not to attend as members of the zodiac," Akito's voice broke at the end.

"I am aware," even as close as they seemed Shigure's voice dropped to where Nami almost couldn't hear it.

Nami watched Hari's silhouette fly toward the ground and Akito's frail frame fly atop his. Nami heard Shigure's sharp intake of breath and the candle light was angled in such a sever direction, "it's your fault that these children are doing such harmful things to me. Your fault I am in so much pain that I can't escape. You all put me through this. All I ask for is for you to give me your love and devotion in return for everything you put me through. I grant you all freedoms and you throw them in my face! It's not long before I will die, and maybe I should just end it all now. Ha! Yes then that really would be your fault Shigure. Your fault for leaving and teaching these children your renegade ways."

Akito stood away from the light and the crumpled Shigure on the floor, "let these burns give you the slightest inkling of what you do to me."

"Akito," Shigure huffed through gritted teeth, "don't…don't mean what you said. Don't kill yourself. We want you here with us."

Akito said nothing and slithered away into the darkness of the hallway. Nami watched Shigure's silhouette crumpled on the ground. She watched him writhe in pain. She listen to him be abused. All the times she said she would do anything to keep him safe and protect him if she were ever able to…all those times she hoped she would have the chance what did she do? She sat in a dark room doing everything in her power not to be discovered. It wasn't even noble reasons she wanted not to be discovered…like having her memories erased. No it was because she didn't want to be discovered as the coward who couldn't help her friend because she was afraid. It was in that speech Akito struck real fear into Nami's heart, and shook something that had not been touched in years. Every demon she feared and even those she thought she conquered flooded out of the closet and swarmed her all at once.

Nami watched Shigure stagger to his feet again and limp away slowly down the hallway. She didn't even have the decency to feel sympathy for him; rather she felt lucky that those words weren't directed at her. Nami was never so tempted to run out of this dark room and go to Shigure. Not to his aid, but right after all he had been through beg for every single one of her memories to be wiped so she wouldn't even know her own name. Because the images she had buried so deeply boiled up and blurred her vision. If it wasn't primal fear that pinned her to the ground she would have succumbed to her whim and deal the worst blow to Shigure yet.

Those memories festered within her and the only way to escape them was to amputate Nami from herself. She let her whole being dissolved into the darkness and hoped nobody would come and try to pull her back together because if she was left there on the floor there would be no need for Hatori. Nami could have been the blackness for all she knew and left that guilty shell behind. She was pulled out of her state of self induced non existence with a voice brimming with hatred.

"Nami," why did she have to still respond to her name especially when Akito said it? Nami couldn't move…no she didn't want to. Akito stood over her, "Nami it's your fault he turned rotten like that. Your fault that the family is split up. Before you we were happy…"

Akito's voice kept talking, but it was no longer his that Nami heard. His voice went to a more gruff one she hadn't heard in years. Nami tried to look at something in the room and let her know it was Akito not _him, _but when she looked into the darkness the rope and…and how it was all her fault. How nonexistence is all she should know, all she deserves to know. How many times had _he_ told her that?

The rhythmic beating that _he…_no Akito gave her subsided. Nami didn't mind the pain though because it let her know she did exist despite everyone's wishes. Now that stopped and darkness was all that consumed her vision she could easily believe what they wanted.

Nami pulled herself in a tighter ball when she heard the fireworks, "they're only fireworks. Not gunshots…fireworks."

Nami had lost all sense of time. When Akito opened the door and didn't walk in any further Nami could have sworn that it was only a few minutes that had passed.

Akito's voice was even, "you can leave now."

Leave. If she were to do that who would want her? Who could possibly stand to look at her and know her cowardice? She could hardly live with herself much less someone else right now. The light exposed her and made her remember what she had let happened to Shigure. How could she possibly…

"Nami?" Hari's voice called with only the slightest hint of worry.

She had promised Hari that she would stay strong. That he wouldn't have to worry about her. The only reason now that his voice hinted at worry was because she was not coming right away. Nami hated herself for what she let happen to Gure right before her, and although she thought she didn't deserve anything good now that doesn't mean she should punish Hari. Heaven forbid Gure find out what her mental state was. She looked at Akito and as much as she hated herself she hated him much more. Nami stood up and faltered for a moment weak from not eating for three days, but caught herself and pushed her way past Akito.

"Hari?" Her voice was like a lullaby she had not heard in years.

Once she turned a corner she saw him still looking ravishing in his suit and she didn't even have to fake a smile, "well how was the celebration?"

"It was quiet eventful," Hari was silenced by Nami's stomach growling stomach, "why don't we find you something to eat?"

Nami blushed, "uh sure."

Nami knew Akito was standing behind her leering toward Hari, but the entire time Hari seemed to not care as if there were something more important keeping his attention. Nami wondered if it was something that happened in the party that distracted him. Hari started to walk out and Nami kept up right beside him.

"We will probably have to go shopping since there was hardly any food left at the house," Nami thought aloud.

"After dinner we can go, but since you didn't get to celebrate the New Year at all so I am treating you," Hari stated matter of factly.

"No I refuse. Really I don't deserve it I am your guest at your house."

"You do deserve it after I let you be abused these past three days. Solitary confinement and who knows what else is not humane. Please let me do this to start to make it up to you."

"It was my mouth that got me…"

Hari cut her off and gave her that piercing look, "please."

Nami blushed but she hoped he blamed that on the cold. She knew there was no real reason to blush. Hari opened the door for her in his car and Nami stood dumbfounded for a moment at how polite he was being but reminded herself to get in the car and not just stand there like a fool. The car purred to life and Hari started to go.

"So where are we going that we can't walk to or take the train?" Nami wondered since most things were in easy accesses.

"We could do those things, but the silence and freedom you get in a car is just so much more appealing don't you think?" Hari's attention never left the road.

Nami didn't mind the silence in the car. It was nothing like the kind she had in that wretched room, because she knew if she wanted to say something to Hari he would give it her full attention. After a short while Hari parked the car and took her hand escorting her out of the car. Nami noticed a lot of women and tittering girls watching them assuming they were a couple no doubt picking Nami apart. She glanced at a store window and saw her disheveled appearance.

"Hari," Nami could not help but gasp at her own visage, "how can you stand to take me when I look like this?"

"You can be such a girl sometimes. You look fine and really you need food in you as soon as possible," Hari comforted.

Nami looked at Hari's perfect appearance, "someone as important as you being seen with me in this state. I have to go back to the car."

"Are you looking for any excuse to not be around me because you're angry with me?" Hari was completely serious as if that were a possibility.

Nami gaped at him, "not at all! Really I don't mind at all, and it is very generous of you to take me out. I don't mean to seem ungrateful."

Hari let a smile touch his face, "good I am glad to hear that. Well now that we have that all cleared up we are here."

Hari opened the door and Nami's eyes widened at how beautiful the restaurant was. The walls here a black marble and candles and low lights dotted the tables guiding your way their even if there was no hostess.

The young girl smiled, "what is your reservation under?"

"Sohma," Hari glanced over toward Nami to gauge her reaction of the place.

"A reservation only place Hatori? You planned this?" Nami hissed hoping the hostess didn't hear.

"As I've said before I intended to take you out since you didn't get to celebrate. Would you have preferred somewhere else?"

"No, I mean yes, I mean. It's just when you said a restaurant I thought you meant what a normal mortal would go out too not something this extravagant."

"Nami you know what you can do for me?"

"What?"

"You can just enjoy yourself and be pampered alright?"

She was tempted to protest more but she sighed and agreed. The hostess finally stopped at a secluded section of the restaurant and an intimate little table with a white-purple orchid growing and two votive candles as its centerpiece. The only other people in their section were pretty far away and they were a couple.

The waitress came over and directed most of her questions toward Hatori which wasn't really a surprise since she was fawning over him. Nami ordered her main course but Hari insisted that they get an appetizer as well. Once the waitress was able to pull herself away Nami sighed and really did try to start to enjoy herself.

"Well how was the party? Was it good to see your family again?" Nami genuinely wondered if Hari enjoyed himself.

"Getting through the basic hellos can be quite a challenge there are always new people joining us with marriages and raises in jobs."

"You know for as dashing as Aya, Shigure and you are I am surprised none of you are married. I mean with the way that all of the girls throw themselves at you constantly it seems like you would have some options."

"Luckily they don't really throw themselves as us or else I would have a lot more work to do, and with our curse it is hard for us to get physically close to people."

"So you don't try?"

Hari was silent for a moment and looked into the two flames on the table, "I did once. Her name was Kana, and she came to my office and was learning under me to become a doctor. I wasn't looking for love, but her optimism and perseverance to just try and make me smile wasn't something I could ignore or rationalize my way out of. We fell in love and she too learned of the secret, but she didn't run away in disgust she just laughed it off and said she loved me for who I was.

"After she knew what I was hiding it was the most freeing experience of my life and we could love each other fully. I couldn't restrain myself and I proposed to her, and she accepted. Before we could move on with the wedding we had to ask Akito for his blessing. We were nothing but formal with him and Kana had never met him before and could not have offended him. Akito is Akito though and he did not take the change well. He injured my eye and told Kana that it was my fault I had gotten hurt.

"No matter what I did or said though I could not make her feel better. I could not convince her it wasn't her fault that Akito could have easily done that without her there. She was getting physically ill and anytime she saw my face she would just cry and apologize. I could not let her keep suffering as she was, and I had to erase her memories of us ever being together. I guess she never really understood how she could never hurt me because of the love she showed me, but that was her way of telling me she had to move on. You know what the last thing she said was that she was sorry. I was the one who was supposed to apologize for not protecting her, and yet she cried for me to the very end."

Nami had tried not to cry. She knew the story already Aya had told her everything, but hearing Hari say it. Hearing the undertone of pain in his voice and knowing he had never forgotten a moment of their love. It was too much and Nami wept into her napkin and even then Hari wiped away a tear from Nami's cheek, but she couldn't stop and put her head on his shoulder. He tensed for a moment, but then patted her hair getting as close as possible and whispered, "you don't have to cry for me. I don't need anyone else doing that."

Nami sucked in a deep breath and calmed herself. He didn't want anyone else crying for him but he deserved more than anyone to be loved and shown that love in some way. Still she patted away her tears with her napkin and smiled her best smile for him.

The waitress finally came over jumping at the break between intense conversation and sobbing. She probably thought the "date" wasn't going well and fawned over Hari more than ever while delivering the food and didn't make eye contact with Nami. She was frustrated with the flirtatious waitress, but Hari got rid of her soon enough and the two were able to enjoy their meal together as Nami glommed down more food than she expected. She could be such a pig if she let herself indulge in it.

"I think it is only fair to let you talk since I hogged so much of the conversation earlier," Hari said after putting down some tea.

"What do you want to know?" Hopefully talking would slow Nami down with eating.

"Why is a charming novelist like you single and not being a free spirit. Traveling and seeing the world, meeting new people constantly, and flourishing wherever you go?"

"You think I am an outgoing person? Ha!"

"You're not?"

"If it wasn't for Gure or Aya I would be a hermit."

"You think so?"

"Well I really am pathetic when it comes to friends. I am ashamed to admit it but besides them I don't have anyone else."

"No one from high school that you have kept in contact with?"

"No I transferred high schools in my senior year so I really lost contact with most people. Even there though I didn't really associate with anyone."

"You transferred in your senior year? That is unusual. Shigure told me you were homeless for a time too when he met you."

"When did he get the chance to tell you that?"

"The night he found you. I was really worried for a while that Shigure was going to fall for you."

"Aw you wanted a girlfriend before Gure had one?"

"I was worried what Akito would do. I was almost relieved that nothing more occurred between you two, but honestly…"

Nami waited for Hari to gather his thoughts, but he seemed to drop the thing entirely, "but what?"

"I," Hari glance down and this was the first time Nami had seen him embarrassed, "before I ever met you I actually thought it would cause Shigure less trouble with Akito if you had stopped associating with Shigure."

"Oh," was all Nami was able to get out and broke Hari's gaze all together.

"Know that I don't feel that way at all anymore. Quite the opposite. I am able to see all the good you have brought into Shigure's life. You are worth it," Hari placed his hand lightly on Nami's.

"And what brings this change of heart now?"

"Well you were balanced and obviously were an outlet for Shigure to experience normality for a while. I had always known that, but meeting you and how reasonable you were was comforting as well. What really did it though was the lengths you would go to sacrifice from yourself for what you thought would be his well being. You made yourself physically and mentally ill the first time trying to stay away, and then you gave up your most precious gift you had…your freedom. Not everyone would do that, but what I realize it isn't just for Shigure. You are just a genuinely good person, and I realize that is why Shigure and Aya gravitate toward you so much. When you live life under a curse to find something genuinely good makes you really look at life differently. Really can make you motivated to trudge on despite everything else."

"So if I had discovered the secret in the same way before I had gotten a chance to actually talk to you several times would you have erased my memories there? That is why Shigure hid me from his other best friend because he was afraid of you?"

"Yes I believe so. He stopped telling me all about you after I reacted so strongly the first night. I was honestly amazed he wanted me to see you after all these years. Because yes, before I talked to you I probably would have done nothing to try and persuade Akito to let you keep your memories. Know this Nami that I feel like the biggest fool these past seven years to have made this judgment on you. I couldn't be more honored know you now."

Nami was about to kill the stupid waitress interrupting such an intense moment on purpose so she could send one last ditch effort to get Hari's attention. Hari of course was nothing but cordial to her and paid the extravagant check that Nami caught a glimpse of. She tried to offer some money but Hari simply would not let her. She sighed because she knew there was no way to win against Hari's determination sometimes.

When they returned home (it was quite surprising Nami found herself calling it that after such a short period of time) Nami flopped in her bed. For as much time as she had been stationary in a dark room she was exhausted. She really didn't know how much or little sleep she had gotten there though it didn't feel like much. Nami sighed herself to a deep sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

I hope you all enjoy. I love constructive critical reviews.

10

Light was starting to touch the sky, and Nami's throat hurt. She tasted the slightest hint of salt and touched her cheek to find wet streams down them. Why had she been crying in her sleep? It was still too early for her to be awake or have set an alarm. What was _he_ dream? The more she tried to think of it the more it seemed to elude her. Nami sighed to herself after trying to remember for a few minutes and tried to fall back asleep. She was exhausted, but was restless. Lying in bed without getting any rest seemed pointless so she got up and started writing and catching up on missed work.

Nami worked through early morning and the sun was now glistening in her room with that golden glow. Nami really wanted a break from her work and despite her gorging last night her stomach rumbled. If Hari could spoil her with decadent dinners Nami could at least make him a nice breakfast.

When she looked through the kitchen she remembered the shopping they didn't get to last night and still was left with minimal supplies for a fancy breakfast. She chewed on her lip and realized she could at least make some fresh pickled plum rice balls. She got to work right away and was actually enjoying cooking for someone other than herself.

"Nice tune," Hari made Nami jump a little with how quietly he could move.

"What tune?" Nami's attention was on the rice balls and determined to get them all done before Hari could help.

It was too late Hari picked up some rice and started molding them with Nami, "you were humming. It was a nice tune."

"Ha singing to myself and I don't even know it. That's not crazy at all."

"Maybe it just means you are comfortable," Hari finished up the last rice ball and walked toward another cabinet to get a platter.

Nami smiled to herself and set the table. And Hari set the rice balls in the middle of the table and they both sat down across from each other. It was nice seeing Hari in the morning before the days stresses had gotten to him and he was exhausted.

"So you didn't protest when I helped you like normal," Hari sipped on some coffee.

Nami shrugged, "well you have an iron will on certain things and stopping anyone who wants to pamper you seems to be one of them."

"Yes well I was wondering if today you would want to accompany me to Yuki's school today, and after that we can go to the grocery store like you had wanted to last night."

"Oh why are you visiting Yuki? Is he alright?"

"Yuki had asthma when he was younger, and he seems to have grown out of it now. Still I tell him to come to me for checkups just to make sure that everything is alright. He missed his last appointment, so it seems I have to go to him."

"Ok well just let me know when you are leaving and I will be right there."

"We will give it a little while before I ruin his day."

"Aww Hari you might not ruin it. I am sure Yuki loves to see you."

Hari seemed like he was laughing inwardly, "coming to the school where Tohru, an outsider that knows of our secret is. Yes I am sure he will be thrilled."

Nami sighed knowing there was nothing to say and started cleaning up. Hari started to try to assist her, but she wouldn't hear of it. Eventually, she got Hari out and was able to clean the kitchen herself. What must it be like to know that anytime your family found someone precious to them they would cut themselves off to you? What was it like to bear the full responsibility of "correcting" the Sohma curse no matter how much it hurt the ones around you? Hari had so much to be upset about and yet he always kept that same demeanor that seemed steely and distant. Was that how he coped with the overwhelming tragedy surrounding him?

Nami shook off her speculations and went back to her room to try and focus on her work once again. Much to her surprise she was able to delve into her novel once again. When she would write time held no meaning to her. Sometimes eight hours could go by and she would only notice because of her hunger. She slipped into one of those spells and wasn't pulled out of it until Hari came in the room.

"Nami," Hari kept his voice low knowing she was deep in her work when she didn't respond he tried again, "Nami?"

This time his voice finally registered and Nami glanced up a bit startled, "oh sorry! Is it time to go?"

"Yes I am going to be leaving, but if you are invested in your work please feel free to stay," Hari's voice gave off a deep welcoming resonance.

"No, I really should stretch out and take a break. I don't want to be a total recluse like usual. Just let me get on my shoes," Nami scuttled around her room.

Soon enough they were off and walking the streets of Tokyo together which surprised Nami since she knew Hari was one to drive. Once they arrived to the school Nami stood for a moment and smiled.

Hari noticed her lagging behind, "is everything ok?"

"Yeah this is just my old school that I transferred to in my senior year," Nami walked past Hari toward the doors.

Hari took a few strides to catch up with her. Nami hardly noticed his presence. There were so many memories left here. This school was the beginning to the start of her new life. Of course it would be where she would meet her first Sohma. It didn't surprise her that the next generation goes here too.

Nami followed Hari down the hall toward Yuki's classroom. Not much had changed these past few years. It really did feel like yesterday she went there. Hari stood before the door and took a quick breath in before he entered the classroom.

"Yuki," Hari started before he dropped his sentence when Yuki and Kyo stood instinctively before Tohru, "I need to see Yuki only."

Yuki glanced toward Kyo and strode toward Hari regaining his perfect charisma. Nami looked over toward the tittering girls no doubt wondering how Hari knew Yuki. Nami also noticed a few of them glaring toward Tohru and hissing whispers. Nami was so tempted to go out and say something to them, but a tall blonde got out an iron pipe right before the girls.

"Is there a reason you are making a scene in my school Hari? Couldn't whatever you say wait until after the day was over?" Yuki sighed still looking glamorous. He looked up and saw Nami, "oh I am sorry I didn't mean to ignore you I just didn't notice you Nami."

Nami didn't respond right away since she was still looking toward the classroom scene with Tohru smiling between two girls and Kyo giving a dower look. The mean girls were paler than bleached sheets, "you Sohma's really amaze me. You really are such good people for taking care of total strangers you know. Not just anyone would do that."

Nami looked toward them and Yuki gave such a friendly smile and Hari was rummaging through his doctor bag and interrupted, "you know if you came to your appointments I wouldn't have to do this. Breathe in."

"We couldn't do this somewhere other than the hallway?" Yuki protested quietly.

Tohru popped her head out of the classroom and her eyes grew wide, "Yuki are you not feeling well? If you weren't you should have said something!"

"No need to worry yourself Ms. Honda Yuki just skipped his appointment with me so I came to him," Hari held most of his attention on Yuki.

"You like advertising that don't you?" Yuki shot a less than perfect glance toward Hari.

"Um Tohru would it be too much trouble if I ask to take a walk with you around the school? I know you are in the middle of class, but I just want a small talk with you," Nami tried to seem as friendly as possible.

"Sure," Tohru beamed.

Nami noticed Yuki looking puzzled at her and glanced again toward Hari but relaxed a bit when Hari seemed as confused as him. Nami didn't know how to start the conversation with Tohru. For a while she let herself be consumed with memories of her dying to get out of class and see Shigure. He would always be smiling and waiting for her outside of school. Despite how he would over act with his flirtatiousness with other high school girls when Nami was around him she remembered how before Shigure saw her in the crowd his expression was always tense and concerned. As if he thought something would happen while he wasn't around. That same Shigure that always looked out for her safety and would do anything to protect her…she let get hurt at New Years.

"You know I used to go to this school too," Nami started the conversation awkwardly not letting herself think about that anymore.

Tohru seemed genuinely interested, "really? You must have so many memories here."

"Yeah I do. I guess that is not what I meant to bring up though. I am sorry this is a total switch but how was your New Years?"

"Oh it was so nice! I felt a little bad because Yuki and Kyo came back home when they started walking to a family gathering at the main house. They seemed to really want to stay at Shigure's when they told me though."

"I am sure they wanted to. I mean they must be fighting over a cute girl like you."

"Uh well I don't know about that. Oh how was your New Years Nami? Did you get a good view from your apartment? Oh wait maybe you were out I really don't know I didn't mean to presume…"

"It's fine. Most New Years I use as a new resolution to get ahead of my work and help out Mi a little bit and give my manuscript early as present to her. I am pretty boring."

"Aw but that is so nice for you to think of her like that. I am sure it really makes her feel good about the upcoming year!"

"You really are a beam of sunshine. Well I better let you get back to class. I just wanted to see if those boys were treating you right or if I would have to say something to Shigure," Nami tried to seem very serious.

"Oh no, no! They are nothing but kind to me really!" Tohru waved her hands wildly.

Nami suppressed a laugh, "you really are too easy to get flustered. Shigure must have too much fun with that. Well get back to class now alright?"

Tohru nodded and gave one last wave before returning to her peers and Yuki being among them. Nami caught his look of worry when he saw her before Tohru, but his expression completely lightened as she came back to the classroom. Hari stood at the end of the hallway waiting patiently when Nami caught up to him.

"I am sorry I hope I didn't hold you up too much!" Nami worried.

Hari shook his head, "it's fine."

"Did you embarrass Yuki enough to make him come to you next time?" Nami nudged Hari playfully.

A quick smile flashed on his lips, "I hope so."

"Now it's time for shopping and you get to be my personal bag boy. I'd say that is some upgrade from a doctor don't you think?" Nami winked.

The walk to the store wasn't too far from the school, and she knew it quiet well. She would often stop by the grocery store right after school so that she could concentrate the rest of the night on either school work or writing. Since she often went right after school Shigure usually helped her with her bags and in return she would stock up on some of his favorite foods and cook for him.

"Do all soba noodles make you sigh so much or just this particular brand?" Hari asked in a perfectly serious tone although he must have been joking.

Nami chuckled at herself, "oh I am just getting sentimental after visiting my old school I guess. I remember being in Tohru shoes so well. All I have to say though is I am glad that Gure and Aya weren't in the same class as me. I would have been a delinquent."

"I doubt that."

"Hrrmm Hari what is your favorite dinner? We should pick up ingredients for it."

"I can't revel such personal information without knowing what you like as well."

"Fine I love domburi of any type."

"Domburi? Why is that?"

"Well from what I recall it is what I would eat most often on my more adventurous nights out with Shigure and Aya…I think. Hey wipe that smile off your face. What is yours?"

"Yudofu."

"Huh. That is interesting. Well we better pick up some tofu and extra soya beans for that!"

Hari carried the bags and Nami tried to get him to stop, but after the first few tries she gave up knowing he would budge. It started snowing again which prompted her to glance at Hari who seemed to be far away in a memory.

"Now that is what a real gentlemen does," an old lady patted Hari's arm and glanced at Nami, "you caught a good one."

"Oh I am sorry we are not actually dating," Nami tried unsuccessfully to hide her blush.

"Maybe not yet you aren't," the old lady winked and walked away.

Nami tried striding ahead of Hari, but he easily caught up with her. Nami avoided Hari for a bit, but she saw a group stop and watch them walk together. The girls sighed and whispered. Did Hari always get this noticed? He was handsome, but could people sense there was something different about him?

"Nami! Hatori!" His voice was unmistakable even in the middle of Tokyo. Ayame bounded toward them and smiled, "are you two out on a romantic date?"

"Yes that is exactly why Hari has a doctor bag and groceries in his hand," Nami rolled her eyes.

"Ah you are making him live out your fantasies….as mundane as they may be I will not judge! But if you are going to expect that of him then you simply must reciprocate the kindness please come in. Let's find what suits you both best!"

"Aya I seriously wonder how many times you were dropped on your head as a child," Nami seethed.

"But neither one of you have ever visited my shop and seen my work," Aya pouted.

"Probably because neither one of us would have any business in there. Anyway, how did you see us shouldn't you be working?" Nami's arms crossed tightly.

"I am on my lunch break and I happened to see you two strolling by. You can't ignore such fate. Please come in and just visit me I promise I won't dress you up Nami," Aya smiled.

Nami glanced up at Hari as he let out a sigh, "a short visit Ayame that is all. Nami and I still have work to get back to."

Aya pranced toward the door and Nami was even more shocked than she expected. Seeing his shop with all types of dresses. Aya couldn't stop ranting about how they did not need to be so impressed with his work, and yes of course they could come and visit every day and so forth.

Nami walked up to a maid's dress and couldn't imagine how this would fit any girl, "umm Aya don't you think this is a little awkwardly proportioned for a normal girl?"

"Ohhh Nami this one isn't for a woman it is for a man! But no worries I there are plenty more styles of the maid outfit if you are interested in it!" Aya beamed.

"There is no way…" Nami was cut off.

"Aya is this Nami? You talk about her all the time! She is just so beautiful!" A girl appeared from nowhere, "I know this is very popular but you could do so much more than a maid outfit. Come on now what I will dress you up as will go beyond any fantasy you could imagine!"

While Nami was being pulled she yelled, "Aya you dirty liar."

"I am not doing anything! I am standing right here," he smiled.

Hari glanced up at Aya, "you know she won't be happy with you."

Aya glanced down at Hari's hands, "who did you have to go and help?"

"Your brother. He is fine, but he decided to skip our appointment so I had to go to his school to make sure everything was alright."

"I wonder if he can't bear to come on to the estate because of me. He didn't even come to New Years."

"I doubt that you are what changed his mind Aya. With the arrival of Ms. Honda he avoids as much contact as possible with Akito and myself."

"Hari you shouldn't beat yourself up like that," Aya trailed when Nami was being pushed out of the room caught his attention, "Hari close your eyes! You really will have to thank me for this one."

"Ayame Sohma I know where you live and I swear I will never let you live this down," Nami growled.

Aya acted as if he were deaf, "now just stand right here."

"Aya I look ridiculous," Nami pouted.

"Open your eyes Hari!" Aya stood before Nami presenting her.

Hari didn't laugh or smirk or even look away embarrassed like she thought he would. Nami's face was scarlet by this point standing before Hari in a purple silk floor length dress. She wasn't even sure what fantasy this was supposed to fill. Hari still didn't say a thing.

"You are speechless and can't look away," Aya pranced in triumph.

Nami couldn't bear it any longer, "I am going to change now."

"Nami," Hari called, "you don't have to be embarrassed about anything you look elegant in that dress."

"Thanks," Nami murmured before she retreated into the back room.

Once Nami changed back into her normal clothes she was able to come back out and be her usual self, "Hari why don't we leave the shop. There is nothing important in here."

"Nami must you be so cold?"Aya pouted.

"I might have to ask you to look at me Hari cause it almost feels like someone is talking to me. I must be hallucinating," Nami strolled out the door with Hari smiling beside her.

They went back to walking home and Nami didn't say a word. Aya and his antics could not have come at a more awkward time. First, the old lady and then him…

"You are pretty quiet," Hari mentioned trying not to press the issue too much.

"Oh yeah just thinking," Nami tried not to think about the day and let her face give her away more than usual.

"Anything you care to share?" Hari opened the door for her unconsciously since they were already home.

Nami told herself it was just habit, and he was just raised well. She was glad that he was behind her though so he wouldn't see her face that blushed again. When she looked up to see who was in front of her though she immediately wished it was Hari.

"Nami! Look at you, you're blushing!" Shigure pinched her cheek.

"Shigure what are you doing in my house," Hatori slipped past Nami and Shigure to put down the food.

Nami followed Hatori's lead, "Gure if you are going to be intruding on us then why don't you put yourself to good use and put away these groceries."

Shigure did help much to Nami's surprise, "intruding on you eh…that and you're blushing. What have you and Hari been doing together to make you so close?"

Nami wanted to yell and tell Shigure to get his mind out of the gutter. She wanted to tell him he was simply ridiculous. She wanted to do all the normal things she would have done with Shigure, but she caught sight of a purple black blotch peeking just past the lapel of his collar and everything stopped for her. She remembered all she didn't do for him despite the years she promised herself she would protect him. She remembered how Akito abused him…how he had been doing that for his entire life and the one time she should have helped she let him down.

Nami's throat clenched up and she ran to her room crying. She couldn't stop and kept sobbing. There was knocking, but she couldn't answer.

"Nami I am sorry are you mad at me?" Shigure pleaded.

No. No she couldn't let him think that. She couldn't let him believe that it was his fault. She was the one to blame. She flung open her door and clung to Shigure. He of course transformed, but that didn't stop her from weeping sorry into him over and over. How could she expect him to forgive her?


	11. Chapter 11

Hey thanks to all of my readers. Last chapter pushed my story to over 1,000 hits! Please enjoy the update.

11

Nami had clung onto Shigure weeping into him for a few minutes. Hari hovered to make sure she wouldn't break down all together and Shigure didn't try to say anything because each time he did it would make a new round of 'I am sorry' start.

Once she finally stopped and let go of Shigure, he almost immediately transformed back. Nami looked away but her eyes were too bleary from tears to see anything. She sucked in a few more deep breaths and realized what she had just done. Of course Hari and Shigure were looking puzzled toward each other not quite knowing how or where to start.

Nami stood up and faced them, "um so I am sorry for that. I uhh…I don't really know why I did that…especially in front of people."

"Nami if you are upset it is ok to show it and tell us about it. Are you sure you don't know what set you off?" Shigure took a step closer and all Nami could look at was his bruise.

Hari saw where her attention went but decided to let Nami speak for herself for now, "I. Well I just noticed your bruise. I guess I let my guilt take the best of me and I assumed it was from someone hurting you, and you know how I always want to protect you."

"Nami you really are too empathetic for your own good. This is just a little bruise. I and everyone else has had bruises before. I mean if anyone should feel guilty it's me for what happened when you first moved…" Shigure was cut off.

"Please don't. You don't have to feel bad about anything ok? I just…I think not being able to see you anytime I want is just getting me paranoid or something ," Nami's eyes were pasted on the floor ignoring her leaden stomach of not being completely honest with her best friend. Despite how she told herself that all of this was for his sanity she couldn't shake that deep down it was for her own selfish wants.

Shigure tousled her hair, "well it seems like you need some time to relax, and being the most wonderful friend you have ever I did something about it! Since I am positive you did nothing fun on New Years I am forcing you to go to a hot spring resort."

"Gure how did you afford that? You can't make that much on your novels. I mean…" Nami ranted.

Shigure interrupted her tirade, "now I reserved enough for two, but unfortunately Mi is the meanest editor ever and thinks I should work more. Luckily, Hari is always a gentleman and would never let you go all by yourself and will join you!"

Hari's eyebrow cocked, "you really need a lesson about assuming."

"You would let poor little Nami go all by herself," Shigure over acted horrified, "anyway you need to relax and get away from work. When is the last time you had a vacation."

"Hari really don't let him influence your decision I understand that you have work," Nami smiled at him and turned to Shigure, "now you have to see about refunding your money. I mean really you need to ask in advance about these things."

"Nami you can go still. It might be nice to get away from it all and spark creativity. Don't let me hold you back," Hari finished putting away the last grocery.

Nami glanced away, "uh well. I don't mind being alone it's just I wouldn't want to upset Akito."

Hari couldn't believe he missed Shigure's hint like that. Of course if she wasn't allowed to leave the estate without another Sohma for groceries that a trip to the hot springs would be out of the question, "what is the date that you booked for Shigure?"

"Oh Hari really don't inconvenience…" Nami waved her hands.

Shigure had no problem interrupting Nami, "the 4 – 6."

Hari pulled out a day timer from one of his endless pockets, "yes I think that could work. Of course it is ultimately up to Akito."

"Ah I am sure with the right terminology he will not mind in the least," Shigure pranced, "so Nami really you don't have to keep thanking me like this. Really it is too much."

"Well any thanks you were going to get is out of the question now," Nami turned her arms tightly across her chest, "Hari I want to reiterate that you really don't need to do this."

Shigure placed his hand on her shoulder, "please it is the only way I can make it up to you for all the years I have neglected you in New Years alone. I never had the courage to skip it and keep you company since you had nobody else. I used to think it was impossible, but Yuki and Kyo stayed with Tohru, and they seemed so happy…"

"You have nothing to make up for. You gave me my home, and are my friend. You shouldn't have to pick between me and your family. I am a friend they are your blood. Stop apologizing if I was mad or upset I would tell you," Nami kept as calm as possible hating how he felt guilty for her.

One of the saddest smiles crossed Shigure's face, "I used to believe that."

Before Nami could do or say anything more Shigure already was walking to the door, "I think I have intruded long enough. I do actually need to work on my manuscript…Mi might do something quiet irrational if I don't get home soon. Call me and tell me how the trip goes!"

Nami watched him leave, and wanted to say something about how he could trust her. How she would tell him anything, but she couldn't. If he knew that Akito had her there he would be so stupid to not even get disgusted with her cowardice and worry about how she was abused. Yet as it stands now he knows that she wasn't telling everything, and knowing that hurt him too.

Nami watched Shigure until he was out of sight and turned surprised to see Hari…how did she forget that he lived here? "You really don't need to ask Akito. I am sure you have a lot of work and…"

"Shigure is right it would be nice to get away for a while and relax. I will bring the trip up to him now since he is anxious to hear about how Yuki is feeling," Hari rationalized though he might have meant what he said.

"What about Kyo? Doesn't he worry about him?" Nami wondered aloud.

Hari's face contorted just a bit, "no…no he doesn't. Kyo is the cat and is not enough importance to even be acknowledged by him. Akito has never even said a simple hello to Kyo."

"That's awful. I mean Kyo is still a part of the family despite whatever you all consider with the zodiac, and he is still so young."

"Yes, well I better be off. I wouldn't want to keep Akito waiting," Hari smoothed his face over and left too.

Much to Nami's and Hari's surprise Akito agreed on the vacation to the hot springs. The only reason that Nami could think of him doing that is because she was so complacent during New Years. Maybe this was his way of training her, but if she could buy some freedom with some physical or emotional pain…well that was something to consider.

Nami tried not to think about it too much though because she wasn't even sure that was the reason why he did all of that. To keep herself busy and keep from upsetting Mi more than Shigure surely did she worked tirelessly on her manuscript so she could take a vacation without feeling any more guilty.

Sometimes it felt like God had a fast forward button he liked to play around with only when things were really busy and stressful. In what seemed like no time at all it was the day of the hot springs trip and Nami was waiting in the hall for Hari to check through all of his medical supplies with him and his personal belongings.

Nami sighed seeing his bag work bag totted with him, "do you ever get a chance to leave your work behind and truly relax?"

"And risk somebody's life because I was unprepared?" Hari scanned the hallway to make sure everything was just so.

Nami chewed on her bottom lip, "would you mind if I drove my car there? I mean if you want to or think it is too ugly I…"

"Of course. I am sure your battery could use the charge," Hari dismissed it for her.

Nami tried to suppress her smile from becoming too wide. How long had it been since she had been in control of any part of her life? She got to decide where she would go for a few hours, sure she would listen to every direction that Hatori gave, but she didn't mind because they were really just suggestions. If she really didn't want to she had the option of going the complete opposite way, and just having that option made all the difference in the world.

Nami flung open her door and threw her bags in the backseat and jumped in the driver's seat. Hari let out a short chuckle to himself and carefully placed his bags in the back seat. When he finally got in the front seat Nami's fingers rapped on the steering wheel hardly able to contain herself.

"Drive up the street and take a right. From there do you know where the back road is?" Hari managed to keep face.

"Yup!" Nami practically floored the car from the residential area.

Hari was silent for a moment, "you really hate it at the Sohma estate that you can't stop yourself from speeding away as quickly as possible."

"Ha! Just because I am generally responsible person does not mean I am one on the road," Nami's sentence was punctuated with a really sharp turn. "You know it was actually Shigure who made me turn in my motorcycle and make me get this car since he said it would protect me at least a little more. He was always such a worry wart that way."

"Remind me why I let you drive again?"

"Because you had this preconceived notion that I would be just at cautious and boring as I would be on the road as I am in my life. You know if I ever do get my memories erased I think I would buy a motorcycle," Nami chuckled a little, "I would probably die in a motorcycle accident like he is convinced I will if I ever step foot on one again."

Hari glanced over at the speedometer and watched it drop significantly, "you do realize how irrational you were being with that last comment?"

"No I decided that I had to take care of myself as much as possible until I do lose my memories. Then I can do whatever stupid shit I want to. A life without friends or family isn't one much worth living, but until then I have to cherish every moment I have," Nami concentrated on the road now more than before so she couldn't see Hari's reaction.

The rest of the ride they were silent together. They always had a comfortable silence though it was never awkward, and no silences ever were between them. Because of Nami's excessive speed in the beginning of the trip they had reached the resort in record time and were even earlier than anticipated.

Hari pulled out both their bags from the back seat, "now I have to warn you that the hot spring owners are…"

"Ahhh master Hatori how are you doing? I am so glad that you took the time out of your busy schedule to come visit our humble resort, and I don't know the young ladies name," a woman with black hair and a green kimono gave a weak smile.

Hari gestured to his side, "this is Nami."

"Ah well master Hatori and Nami please follow me. Let my husband take your bags for you. You can change into something more comfortable here," The hostess showed them into separate rooms right next to each other.

The changing room was simple, but it was very calming. Once Nami changed she noticed another set of doors and opened them. She saw the garden rock garden and the forest encapsulating the resort. There was no Akito that could ruin this weekend and freedom.

Apparently Hari's room connected to the same place outside and held out some towels, "would you like to go out and relax in the hot springs now?"

"Nah I really don't think I will be doing that this weekend," Nami sighed.

Hari's brow furrowed, "oh…ok um what would you like to do then?"

"Give me that," Nami tittered, "for being so smart you really don't do sarcasm well."

Nami started pulling off her top before Hari spun around, "I am sorry I didn't realize you would want to change outside."

"Oh it's fine. I mean you must not really care about people being naked or anything like that since you are a doctor and all. I mean I'm more of like a subject really," Nami slowly inched open her robe. She basked a few more seconds in Hari's despair and then laughed, "I am not going to do anything don't worry Hari. I'm going back in the changing room."

"Yes I think that will be a bit more appropriate," Hari sighed.

"That is unless you want me to join in your hot spring," Nami winked.

Hari's brow furrowed, "I am starting to see the effect Shigure and Ayame had on you those seven years."

"Good man. Now you are catching on," Nami slipped into the other room.

Nami was out to the hot springs in a flash she was so excited. She had never done anything so relaxing or fun before. The only thing she wished is that there wasn't a wall between her and Hari. Not that she was thinking like a pervert as Gure would, but it would make conversation easier. For a while both sides were silent enjoying the serenity this place allowed for.

"Would it be too forward of me to ask a few questions about you?" Hari broke the silence.

"No not at all. I never offered it before because I wasn't sure you ever cared enough to hear about me, but by all means ask away."

"Well why did you think I was uninterested about knowing about you?"

"Well you can be a very hard person to read at first…actually you still are hard to read exactly what is going on but it gets easier with each day."

"Hm," Hari paused for a while.

"What is it that you really want to know? You can ask. You don't have to hesitate so much."

"And you think that you are bad at reading me. I suppose what I am most curious about is the fact that you have never mentioned your family, and I remember Shigure protesting violently about you staying at Sohma estate. He said something about losing the freedom you worked so hard for…" Hari trailed as if he wanted to drop the subject.

"You realize that wasn't a question," Nami hoped that her humor would encourage him.

"Right well would it be to forward of me to ask what your family history was like?"

"You're not gonna kick me out if I do right?"

"No of course not! Don't be ridiculous."

"Well my mom passed away when I was born so I can't tell you much about her. I just…I had to leave home when I did. My father was sick and I was just an extra burden she couldn't really care for so I decided to leave."

"He never tried to send you any assistance and left you homeless?"

"Well he didn't know I was going to leave…"

"You ran away from home? Haven't you ever thought that he was worried about you? Even if you weren't rich then I am sure he would rather…"

"He never came looking for me. Not once. Believe me he didn't care," Nami was really glad that Hari couldn't see her. She couldn't believe that she was getting so worked up over him.

"I am sorry for bringing up," Hari said quietly.

"No don't," Nami's voice cracked.

"Nami I…" he trailed.

Nami interrupted him with a more steady voice, "seriously it is fine. I know your families deepest secret. Of course you deserve to know about my past. I was just a poor girl in Tokyo. You know it really baffles me that you sincerely believe you are a terrible person."

"Have I said that?"

"Not directly but 'there are many ways to be ugly' and comments like that can give me a hint. I have never been happier than when I was with the Sohma's. Really you need to see all the good you do for once."

"Does your optimism have no end?"

"I am just telling the truth. You need to stop being so pessimistic."

Another silence ensued for a while. It had been so long since Nami actually spoke of her past. She only told Shigure and Aya about it many years ago, and since then it was bottled up. She was thankful she wasn't telling him face to face where he would look shocked and full of sympathy. Or worse his eyes would betray that they wanted to ask a flurry of questions that would hit her like a machine gun. She slipped deeper into the water trying to let the weightlessness and heat fill up her consciousness. Still his face would appear and memories started flooding in so instead she decided to keep talking.

"Hari what was your childhood like?" Nami spoke once she was sure she would sound alright.

"It was a relatively normal childhood for someone with our curse."

"Really?"

"Well Shigure, Ayame, and myself were all born the same year and are all older than Akito. So for us we grew up together. It wasn't until we were already in high school that Akito assumed power of head of the family. So even though Akito is the true head of the family the three of us have more influence than most of the other zodiac members."

"No wonder you three are especially nurturing toward others. I mean look at your profession. You are a doctor. I really don't understand how you think you are a bad person."

"There are times where I have to let things happen like what you went through at New Years. I wish I could say that was the only time I have let something like that happen."

"You can't control everything, and besides I am sure you did what you thought would be the best at the time. If you always tried to be blatantly noble there could have been worse repercussions."

"If I am going to believe that then you have to believe that is true with your past as well."

"Ah well played…"

"You can't?"

"For you I will. Anyway let's stop dwelling on the past and really enjoy everything about here and now. I don't know about you but I could go for some gourmet food!"

Nami changed back into her robe and knocked to the room where Hari was, "can I come in?"

"Of course," Hari opened the door.

Nami smiled not just because she got out of a relaxing hot spring, or because she had delicious food to enjoy, but because she was alone with Hari. Seeing him in a robe abandoning his doctor's coat or suit made her realize they were able to fully relax with one another.

"Is something amusing you?" Hari noticed how smiley she was especially after talking about such serious subject matter.

"I don't know why but I was half expecting to see you in your normal doctor attire," Nami laughed at herself.

"Do I look that weird in this?"

"Oh no it isn't that you look bad in your robe at all. It is just seeing in you in it made me realize how happy I am Gure sent us here because we are able to just really relax with one another. To be able to be removed from all stresses like this and do it with a friend is the best part of vacations."

Hatori let his rare genuine smile appear, "you're right it is nice."

The door slid open, "if I may be so bold as to intrude. You dinner is served."

They both followed the hostess to the dining room to see a buffet that could feed at least five people laid out for their enjoyment. What wasn't on that table? Nami sat down across from Hari and he insisted that he serve her first. Instead of fighting like usual Nami sighed and caved.

"You know what," Nami paused gorging herself on food for a bit, "I am glad Akito took away my apartment."

Hari's eyebrows raised, "why is that?"

"Because if he didn't I probably wouldn't have ever gotten to know you like I do now. Don't get me wrong I love Gure and Aya, but I am just really happy I have gotten to know you as well," Nami tried not to blush hoping it didn't sound too gushy, "I mean I don't mean to sound like a weirdo or anything but I just…"

Hari put on that Sohma charm that came so naturally to them, "I am glad to have gotten to know you too."

Nami decided to eat something to escape having to talk for a bit despite the butterflies that appeared for no apparent reason. She looked at Hari and tried to take in every feature. The robe showed he had a relatively good build from what little she could see. His face was well defined, and how could she have ever thought he was cold before when she looked at him? He was so selfless and when he was analyzing it was to make sure you were ok. He was a good frie… Why was she so hesitant to say he was a friend? I mean it wasn't like she fell in love with him. It wasn't like she wanted to spend every moment with him and know every avenue his thought process he took.

Nami bit her lip and took one look at him, and he looked across with a pleasant expression masked with a worried undertone because he heard her gasp. She looked at him and tried to think about being away from him and going back to living alone.

Seeing him in such a relaxed atmosphere was when Nami realized she was in love with Hatori Sohma.


	12. Chapter 12

Hey all I am really sorry that this one is so late on Wednesday, but hey at least I got it out on time…well my neck of the world anyway. I hope it was worth the wait!

12

Nami wanted more than anything to get away from everything and sort out her emotions. Maybe if she was lucky reason her way out of loving someone. She looked up at him and noticed Hari was staring at her.

"You have been rather quiet over there for some time. Is there something on your mind?" Hari's dark eyes penetrated right into her.

She met that intense gaze, "I was just spacing out I guess. It happens a lot when you're a writer. Half the time you are living in your own fantasy world."

"Is the one you're in currently boring you?"

"Hardly. It is so stimulating that I guess I retreated into myself to reflect upon it." Nami had to keep talking or else she could be drawn back into herself with her dangerous emotions. "you know what is funny about being a writer?"

"What?"

"That you tend to stare a lot. I find myself looking at people just to soak in their features, mannerisms, or just because you think that they look interesting. I can't tell you how many funny looks I have gotten and it is only then that I realize I am doing it!"

"That's how you read people so well."

"Who said I did?"

"It's obvious I picked it up myself. Although, I must admit that Shigure did warn me about you when you were moving in and your talent for reading people."

"Well you have to be able to read people to write stories. I have been yakking too much. Is there any weird quirks that you have picked up from being a doctor?"

"Well you already know about the pulse thing. To my core though when I look at a person I wonder what is wrong in them. The most frustrating fact you realize as a doctor is that nobody is completely healthy. If there is no devastating sickness that I can pick up, then I know that there is one in the process I should be catching. Every moment we live is another moment closer to death."

"Well isn't your head a cheery place?"

"I suppose you're right."

"You know you could always look at what you do like you are the person elongating your patient's life; without your expertise death would fall upon them even sooner. You are the person who people come to and beg for you to outsmart father time. Guess what you do it!"

"Always the optimist Nami, I need someone like you by my side."

"Uh, why?"

"To thaw my icy core."

"Ah, but if we are going to speak in metaphors you should at least be correct about them."

"How is my metaphor wrong?"

"Ice floats. You may carry around an icy exterior, but water is what your core is. I can see the holes in your frozen façade to know that for sure."

"Maybe you made those holes."

Nami was breathless. She was hoping that talking would distract her from her emotions, but look at where the conversation ended up! Was it possible for a heart to beat out of a chest?

"I am sorry to interrupt," the hostess bowed, "but I wanted to see how your meal was progressing."

"We are enjoying it very much. It was delicious," Hari seemed to be talking in a more calming voice than normal.

"Yes I could not eat another bite!" Nami spoke up.

"Would that mean you were done?" The hostess smiled.

Hari nodded, "I believe so."

"Would you be ready to retire for the night then?" The hostess suggested.

Nami grabbed at the chance to be alone, "I think I am. It is amazing that I have been so pampered today and can still feel so drained."

"Let me show you your quarters then," the hostess stood from her bow.

Nami glanced at the table and was amazed it was cleared already. Someone had worked around Nami without getting her attention at all. Hari and Nami walked side by side down the hallway. Nami wondered who's room the hostess would show first? Hari was family, but he never spoke of being tired. So did that only leave Nami then?"

"Here is your room," the hostess opened the door but didn't address anyone in particular.

Nami was about to ask for clarification on who's room it was until she looked in. There was one bed as she expected, but it was queen sized. If that weren't suspicious enough there were candles everywhere and flower petals on the floor. Nami didn't even know how to process this.

"We heard of your engagement Master Hatori, but I had never gotten you a wedding present, Consider this small upgrade as the least we could do for you both," The hostess bowed.

Nami's face had never been so hot before. How was it everyone construed them as a couple? Was she that obvious? Did she seem weird or desperate? Before Nami could throw herself into an emotional tortured spiral of self pity she glanced at Hari's expression. It was vacant as if he were being thrown back into a pool of memories. Or maybe moments unlived. No he wasn't vacant at all, his eyes, the way they crinkled…he was upset. He put up a vacant exterior to cover the pain.

Nami couldn't let him handle this. It was Hari's turn to sort out his emotions, "I, this is all very sweet of you to think of Hatori like this. I am sure flattered by your thoughtful hospitality, but Hari and I are not engaged. You are probably thinking of Kana; unfortunately Hari and her parted ways and never went through with the marriage."

Her reaction was worse than Nami expected, "I'm sorry! I am so sorry! I deserve to be tortured in the most excruciating ways for my ignorance. I am lower than the dirt. Please forgive me world!"

While Nami stood there flabbergasted Hari spoke up, "please relax and don't be upset with yourself. It is my fault you didn't know. It has been too long since I visited. I take for granted that I will see the relatives at New Year's but of course that is a very busy time here. Working yourself up like this is no good for your health."

"Why yes of course. Again I must apologize for my insolence. Because of my assumption about your relationship we have made an error with the number of vacant rooms. All I have to offer for separate rooms is to occupy my own room. It is not the same quality, but…"

"That won't be necessary," Hari interrupted, "this room is very luxurious and there is a couch over there I can sleep on."

The hostess bowed out and gave a few more profuse apologies. Nami and Hatori were left in the room meant for a wedding couple, and Nami thought that someone must have it out for her, "let's blow out these candles."

Hari followed her lead, and silence ensued. The silence wasn't a normal comfortable silence where they could just enjoy each other's presence; rather it was heavy and laden with questions. Nami gnawed on her lip debating if she should be sympathetic or act like nothing happened.

"You know you don't have to sleep on the couch," she managed to say.

Hari's eyebrow raised, "if not there then…"

"Uh I just meant to say that you could sleep on the bed and I could sleep on the couch. You always work so hard and this is your families hot spring so…"

"I really can sleep anywhere. I wasn't exaggerating about that."

"We will see about that," Nami murmured to herself.

Once they finished blowing out all the candles Nami had to say something, "is it hard?"

Hari's eyes grew, "what?"

Nami resisted the urge of burying her face, "I meant to be reminded like that of Kana. I mean it has to be hard on you."

He glanced away for a moment, "I guess it just reinforces the reality of it. It's isn't like I forgot about it or don't think about her every day…"

"Of course," Nami almost whispered, "do you know where there is a bathroom so I can change into PJ's?"

"I think it is just over to the right," Hari pointed settling himself in the couch.

Nami slipped into the bathroom and took a deep breath in. She opened her eyes to the bathroom where there was the same romantic treatment and a bath filled with flower petals. Nami's knees caved in beneath her. It was too much knowing what she could never have. This whole scene tortured her seeing what would never be. Hari said it himself that he still thought of Kana, and still would love her. Even if they were able to love one another so far how could she ever possibly ask him to put everything on the line again? Of course she would fall in love with a forbidden fruit. Why did this have to happen? Why couldn't he just be a friend? Why, why, why?

Nami sucked in a deep breath and changed. She refused to let her silent sobs continue and practiced breathing regularly. She walked up to a mirror and saw her reflection. Her eyes were puffy and her tears stained her face. She found a washcloth and rinsed it with hot water. Another deep breath and she was striding toward the door emptying her mind of its cluttered thoughts.

She found Hari already fast asleep on the couch. He was too kind. Nami crept in bed and just stared at the black abyss that surrounded her. Everything in winter was so quiet leaving too much space for her mind to think. Was it her thoughts that made the night so black?

She was pulled out of those colorless thoughts by Hari's tossing. She realized that she was keeping track of his even breathing as if it were her lullaby and now that was interrupted she was aware of his every movement. All she could concentrate on was Hari's discomfort, and probably due to him sleeping on the couch. He started mumbling and for a while Nami couldn't catch what he was saying.

"Un…Sor…Kana…sorry," Nami caught those few words from him.

Of course he would dream about his love. Nami hated hearing how he was tortured in his sleep as well as his waking hours. Couldn't he at least have good dreams? Nami had been sitting up staring at him the entire time. She was so tired of seeing Sohma men suffer right in front of her and not being able to do anything about it.

She tiptoed to the couch clutching her pillow and was hesitant to breath. This could be so awkward if he awoke now, but what did she really have to lose? Maybe if he really didn't like her then it would be easier to deal with not being able to love him.

Another bout of Hari's mumbling broke her thoughts and Nami sucked in a deep breath. She started humming very quietly a lullaby from her past. After a while of humming Hari calmed down a bit but not fully so Nami got the courage to lightly stroke him and run her fingers in his hair. If he were to wake up there would be no way he would be able to think she wasn't a creep. Luckily, humming and stroking seemed to calm Hari down and lull him into a deep rest. Adults still respond to the same calming techniques as they did when they were children.

Hari looked so handsome in the pale light of the moon leaking through the rice paper. His black hair was tousled framing his perfectly relaxed face. Nami closed her eyes since she couldn't take acting like this and looking at him. It would never work out between them and she had to accept that.

"Right now he was dreaming of Kana," Nami thought to herself, "you are only doing this to help the Sohma's and repay them in whatever insignificant manner you can. You are not doing this so you can live some fantasy that you are a lover."

Nami wondered what her true intent was. At some point though the black of the sky, the room, and Hari's hair all melded together and consumed her vision. When bright light seeped in Nami's eyes fluttered open and were greeted with the fabric of the couch. After a long yawn Nami sat up and realized she was on the floor. Nami rubbed her eyes and realized that she hadn't brought the blanket down or positioned the pillow to be under her head, and yet there they were. Hari wasn't on the couch, and Nami checked the bed and he wasn't there either. The door was open to the bathroom and he wasn't there either. Before Nami's brain could think of more options of where he could have gone off to the door opened revealing him with two cups of coffee.

"Morning," Hari handed Nami a cup.

The warm cup felt good in her hands, "thanks."

"You are quite stubborn aren't you?" Hari smiled just a bit.

Nami huddled beneath the blanket more, "why do you say that?"

Hari patted the seat next to him on the sofa, "you really didn't like me sleeping on the couch did you? That is why you were on the floor."

"Yeah," Nami brought the blanket up with her on the couch and stared into the coffee.

"Even if you are being stubborn you know you can bring a cover with you on the floor," Hari sipped his coffee.

Nami 's eyes darted to Hari realizing he was the one to cover her up, "um so did you sleep well last night?"

"Yes actually surprisingly well. I told you I could sleep anywhere. You don't need to worry so much," Hari seemed genuinely rested for once.

"How can I not worry?" Nami stood up and grabbed her robe, "well I better get changed and just have to face another whole day of pampering."

She changed and when she came out she hoped it wouldn't too awkward to see Hari again after her slip up. She would have a good time away from the house. There was nobody to blame for ruining her good time except for her, and how could he let that happen? When she went back out a breakfast feast awaited them.

Once they were finished breakfast a male host with black hair and tanned skin came out bowing, "would a deep muscle massage interest the two of you?"

Nami's back was protesting from the floor, "sure that sounds really nice."

"I think that sound perfect," Hari agreed.

They followed the man through the hallways and Nami was really looking forward to being alone in a room and not having to worry if she would look weird or say something off. Just as she finished telling herself that today would be a better and different day they were both led to a room with two massage tables.

Nami's face contorted but Hari bent over to whisper quickly, "do you remember how much the hostess freaked out last night? It is bound to be much worse if we correct him on this."

Nami didn't want to upset anyone any further especially another Sohma and so she nodded as the host turned around, "here are your towels. I will be right back out with another worker and get your oil."

Once he left Nami and Hari had not moved a muscle and stood there stupidly for a moment until Nami spoke up, "how about we just face opposite directions make ourselves situated in the tables we will have our heads facing down do it won't be a problem. I will turn around to get on the table first and I will tell you when I am ready for you ok?"

Hari nodded and the both spun away really fast. When Nami turned around to get on the table she couldn't resist temptation and took a good up and down of Hari. Even from his backside Hari still had a nicely toned body, and his perfectly toned….ah too far! She almost leapt on the table, and had never been more thankful that Hari could not see her face.

"Ok I'm good," Nami called.

She heard Hari get on the table and it wasn't much longer before she heard the door clack and voices call, "ah here they are! Now just relax."

It really wasn't so awkward the massage now that neither of them could really see the other. Nami let her senses be indulged and got almost all of the kinks out of her back until the host spoke up again, "hey I just thought of something! Why don't we let your man massage you? I mean I am sure he is getting jealous over there."

"Oh really he always works so hard he really deserves a break. I mean he is the doctor, anyway he is not very good at it" Nami blurted out as many excuses as fast as possible.

"Now don't be so shy it his husbandly duty to do things like this. Anyway, I think another man has been touching you long enough. And if he isn't that good then now is a perfect time for him to learn to get better and bring the skills back home!" the host persisted.

"I just," Hari stumbled.

"Come on over here and just start with the upper back like this," the host put Hari's hands on her, "now go on don't be shy."

Nami was really never more thankful now that her face was shielded. It was too much Hari doing this. She was trying to think of anything to get out of this but the stupid host would not let the subject drop.

Hari caved and just went along with it, and when he started it was even better than the professional. Probably because he was a doctor and knew all the anatomy or something…not that she could think so well when she was put in this state. She imagined Hari standing over her with just a towel on massaging her back…no she had to stop so she just caved in to all the sensory pleasure.

"You really shouldn't be complaining too much it seems like he knows what he is doing. I will leave you two alone. All the way up her legs…it is a full body massage," the host's voice melded with the clack of the door.

Once Nami heard the clack she shot right up. Hari diverted his eyes and actually had just the slightest hint of red touching his cheeks. Nami just sat there baffled that Hari could have such a reaction until she realized her top half was completely exposed.

"Oh my I am so sorry I am so stupid!" Nami threw on her robe as quickly as possible as Hari stood there awkwardly half nude, "I am really sorry about all this. I don't mean for you to do all this I mean…"

Hari placed his finger on her lips and his dark eyes were unwavering, "you don't have to apologize. We should just relax in here for a little while in here though. What would they think if we just left after a minute?"

Nami sat back on the massage table, "I am sorry."

"Why do you keep apologizing?" Hari rubbed his temples.

"I just can't imagine…uh never mind," Nami realized Hari was still only in a towel, "I must say for a doctor you are pretty well built though."

Hari's eyes widened just a bit and he snatched his robe up in his hands and threw it on, "yes I just…I mean well…"

"Eh now we're even with embarrassing ourselves in front of one another. I mean it probably didn't even bother you with me I am just another sack of flesh."

"Don't get too comfortable I am still a man…"

An impish smile plastered across her face, "ahhh so Hari can have some normal emotions eh?"

"Well I think we have spent enough time in here to convince them. Why don't we go to the hot springs?" Hari started walking toward the door.

Nami ran up to him, "ah avoiding the subject huh? You know it is ok to talk about them. I mean you don't have to now, but if you ever are stressed or anything you always can come talk to me and vent."

Hari stopped in his tracks and turned to her with a smile, "thank you and I would take you up on that offer, but I don't think I will need to."

"Why not?" Nami's brows stitched together.

"I enjoy being around you and don't think about the things that upset me," Hari walked to his hot spring.

Nami walked to her side and there was a large bamboo fence separating them once again, "I wish I could change one thing about this resort."

"And what is that?"

"I hate having to talk to you through a fence. It feels so impersonal."

"Then come over here."

Nami's mouth almost hit the floor, "What would they say if they found us like that?"

"We are both mature adults I think we can do what we want," Hari suggested as if it were really no big deal.

Could Nami really handle the situation though? Hari may not care, but that didn't mean she didn't. Maybe he was suggesting it because he might possibly feel the same way? No she couldn't let herself think like that. What did he care he was a doctor…although he did just say…no Nami would just have to accept and be an adult.

"Alright then," Nami wasn't used to getting flustered so easily. When she came over she clutched her towel tight trying her best not to feel weird. Something conveniently caught Hari's attention and Nami slipped in, "I am so glad that Aya and Gure aren't here."

"Why is that?"

"Well can you really say that it would be relaxing with them by our side? Who knows what they would get themselves into? Sometimes I swear they are no better than children. Aya would have tried to peep over the fence like twenty times and Gure would be the one lifting him up. I mean do you think we could be doing this if they were around?"

"Not without them commentating on every move of ours."

They slipped into one of their familiar silences again and Nami couldn't help but laugh, "you know I don't mind silence. I think it is funny though that we put ourselves in this position so we could have more intimate conversation and fell to one of these again."

"So what do you want to talk about then?"

"I want you to decide. I want to know what is on your mind."

"That is a dangerous can of worms you just opened. Are you sure about that?"

"Of course I am. I like a challenge."

"Did Akito give you your bruises on your stomach?"

"You were being a peeping Tom?"

"You were the one to sit up in front of me in the massage room."

"Oh right…well I guess it was from Akito during New Years."

"You guess?"

"It just those three days kinda blurred together. Anything else you wanna talk about?"

"What were your other boyfriends like?"

"Why would you be curious about that?"

"Didn't you say you wanted me to start a conversation? Now if all you do is deflect my question that doesn't seem like much of a conversation."

"Eh I dunno they never really lasted too long to where I got much of a personality out of them. I think the longest I knew any of the guys was only a few weeks. Gure and Aya didn't think any of them were up to my standards and literally banned me from most of them. I got pretty sick of them being so over protective and I went off on a rebellious binge all culminating with this one guy I managed to keep secret from them for a while. He was my only long term relationship."

"Now how rebellious are we talking?"

"Well he was a member of a gang."

"Really which one?"

"Umm well he was part of the Yakuza."


	13. Chapter 13

Hello my lovely readers! I hope you all are having a good week and are in the mood for a nice long chapter. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and pushing me over the 50 mark! I feel so honored. Enjoy!

13

Hari couldn't mask his shock, "You went for a Yakuza member?"

Nami thought she might bite her lip off, "yeah. Anyway he was really not a good person. I think I knew that but I didn't care. I just really hated being told what to do even if it was by Gure and Aya. His name was Kaori and was a typical Inagawa with his tattoos and pompous attitude. He loved telling me about how rich he was from buying whatever stock or blackmailing some businessman and how he couldn't wait to spend it on me. He was the one who got me on my obsession with motorcycles and put lead in my feet. He was used to being pretty secretive so Gure and Aya only found out about our relationship because we were flaunting ourselves around town in his car. Boy when I got home that night and found Gure and Aya in my apartment did I get an earful. I had actually deluded myself at the time that I loved that piece of filth. It is amazing Aya and Gure ever forgave me."

"What made you stop loving him?"

"Gure and Aya convinced me that they should at least have lunch with the guy and meet him, and I agreed just to get them off my back. I dragged those two right into the middle of a Yukuza hang out. I can't believe they actually followed me in there. Well lunch didn't go as well as I hoped and got heated. Kaori eventually threatened Gure and Aya, and that is what made me realize the lowlife he was. I broke up the fight and with him right there.

"For a little while Gure and Aya didn't go home until I was sure the Yakuza wouldn't follow them. I told them I had to break off contact with them for a little while until things cooled down. It took me until the day you met me to go over to Gure's place because I was so nervous that something would happen. Between then we would meet up for lunch dates or some indiscriminate place for a few hours. So when you all say that the Sohma's are evil or whatever I can't help but smile. You are nothing compared to the underbelly of society, and really have kept me from that world. It was no wonder really Shigure flipped out so much when I broke off contact with him without letting him know. He must have thought something happened to me because of them."

"Well you have had a pretty interesting dating history haven't you?"

"Hari if you don't want me in your house anymore I understand…"

"Don't be ridiculous. We all have parts of our past that we are not proud of, but it doesn't mean you should be ostracized for your mistakes."

Relief overwhelmed her, "thank you so much. Um, so I have been talking way too much."

"Says who?"

"Alright then. You know part of the reason I dated such disgusting people is because I really believed I didn't deserve any better."

"Do you still feel that way?"

"Why does it matter to you man I am sitting across in a hot spring with? You know you are not acting like yourself."

"How am I acting then?"

"Well I dunno kinda like…" Nami was cut off by the host's frazzled appearance.

"I am sorry to interrupt, but Master Hatori has a call from master Shigure," he bowed and left the hot springs hardly noticing Nami at all.

Hari's brow stitched together Nami looked away as he got out. She followed behind him not even bothering to dry off before getting into her robe, "do you want me to stay here Hari?"

"If it is Shigure I am sure you can listen in as well. He is probably doing all of this to get a rise out of us," Hari strode toward where the hostess held the phone, "Shigure?"

Nami sat next to Hari, but she couldn't hear what Shigure was saying. She did catch the tenor of his voice which sounded panic stricken.

"Did you check his vitals and called an ambulance?" Nami's heart dropped when Hari suggested this there was another pause, "you know I will."

Nami couldn't catch anything on Shigure's side his voice had dropped so much.

"I will be there as soon as possible," Hari clicked the phone and was nothing but business now, "I am sorry to cut your vacation short but there is an emergency back home I need to attend to immediately."

Nami shook her head, "no it's fine let's go."

She ran to the room gathering their things while Hari explained to the hostess about their early dismissal. When Hari came in Nami couldn't help but wonder, "who got hurt?"

Hari seemed to age right before her, "Akito. He has always been prone to sickness, but I never thought…"

"Hari you take such good care of Akito it isn't your fault," Nami jumped in to console him.

"I arranged for Aya to visit Akito daily while I was away. When he walked in today to check on him he found him in a bath tub with his wrists cut. Apparently Aya came just in the nick of time and called the ambulance and then proceeded to call Shigure. They decided not to tell me until now because they didn't want to ruin the trip and he was being taken care of. The only reason they did was because Akito regained consciousness and demanded I would be there," Hari was carrying most of their belongings to the car while Nami had almost nothing.

They jumped in the car and Nami let her foot slam the floor, "well I will drop you off at the hospital and get all our stuff in the back settled in the house."

Hari looked toward his window, "he wants you there too."

"Oh," was all Nami could think to say and then fell silent to her thoughts.

At first she read Hari's signals as purely sadness for what Akito almost pulled off. Nami's stomach iced over but she blamed that on her memories. She glanced over at Hari to try and read him, but all she caught him doing was staring at his hands. Hari didn't comment on how fast Nami was driving and due to her break neck speed they got to the hospital in record time.

Hari walked up to the desk and the nurse smiled, "Dr. Sohma what brings you here? You usually never take hours here but we are always glad to have such an able doctor in our midst."

"Can you lead me to an Akito Sohma's room?" Hari's voice was flat.

"Of course this way," the petite nurse led them through circuitous hallways teeming with action. Everything was sterilized even the walls and floor where unchanging white, "he should be here."

Nami peered past Hari and saw Aya and Shigure slumped in their chairs. Hari strode in and Nami swore that his expression was as distant as a marble sculptures. Ayame and Shigure hugged Hari and then glanced over to Nami who was still standing at the door unsure if she really should interrupt a family moment like this.

Aya came over and placed his hands on Nami's shoulders and his golden eyes bore so much sadness, "Nami please come in with us."

Nami nodded and when she looked toward Shigure she noticed he was as far away as he could be from Hari. Hari never seemed to be the touchy feely type but still. Shigure's face was contorted in a tortured expression that only seemed to get worse when he looked at her. Was that just her guilt making her interpret the situation like that?

Nami sat down next to Shigure and put her hand in atop his and squeezed it. She wanted nothing more than to give him a hug, but she hoped that gesture would suffice. Nami glanced over to the bed and noticed Akito was waking up. Hari had been standing over him fidgeting with the blood bag.

"Hatori you came," Akito's smile was weak.

"Of course I would," Hari settled himself in a chair right by Akito's head.

Akito glanced down to the end of the bed where Nami sat, "you even brought her. Ah Hatori I missed you so much."

It wasn't until then Nami realized how tightly bound Hari was to Akito. Hari lived physically the closest on the estate to Akito and visited him daily. Shigure got to live outside the Sohma estate but even Aya who lived on there it seemed like he didn't see Akito all the time. Was Akito keeping Hari so tightly bound as his punishment for Kana? Did Akito only do this rash action because he could sense how close Nami was getting with Hari? She dismissed the last idea; nobody would risk their own life like that just to prove a point.

The Sohma men flittered around Akito doting on him and abiding by his every whim while Nami continued to sit in the chair. She really didn't belong. She knew Akito hated her so why would he ask her to come? Was he doing this to show her how much pain she had caused him…and what it led him to do.

No it isn't the same as before. How could she have influenced this? She only knew Akito a little over a month, but he did say that he was upset from keeping Shigure away from him for seven years. Now she was taking Hatori his closest family member away. The rope in her living room with _him…_

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry," Nami sobbed.

Everybody's attention was now focused on Nami and her random outburst. Before anyone got the chance to go over and console her Akito spoke, "would you let me talk to Nami privately? I am sure you are hungry you should go get some food."

They reluctantly left Nami and gave her long looks of worry while tears still ran down her cheeks. She couldn't compose herself even for their comfort. Once they left Akito spoke again, "please come over here."

Nami sat in the chair that was still warm from Hari, "I…I just."

"It comforts me to hear sympathy from you. I am relieved you have enough humanity in you to realize what you are doing," Akito said with a perfectly demure face.

Nami sniffled confused, "what is that?"

"You realize you are tainting those around you. You try to rationalize it but when situations get severe enough you realize what you really are."

"No I…"

"Every time I try to show you the truth you run away from it. Do you know what caused me to lead me to such rash actions? It was you. I always knew you were pulling away Shigure from me, but then you started working on Hatori. You had fled with him for the weekend, and the only reason I let you go on the trip was because Hari did deserve a break but would not go without you. I wanted to discover a little more the woman living with my family and I found your school records. It said you transferred and gave me your old address. I decided to talk to your neighbors about what kind of person you were and do you know what they said?"

Nami fell silent unable to summon words so Akito continued, "they told me about the part of your past you were trying so hard to hide. That you are a murder."

"I didn't…"

"They told me about how your father was strangled to death and the rope was thrown away in the dumpster. About how you left before police had discovered him. You were homeless that entire time to lose track of the police and let Shigure put the apartment under his name so they couldn't trace you. For all your novels you go by a pen name."

Nami couldn't breathe and was almost positive the walls were closing in on her as Akito droned on, "I had let a murderer live and crawl their way into my family. I was housing a criminal. Giving her exactly what she wanted of a concealed identity. Yet if I told any of them the truth they wouldn't believe me. You surely would lie to them and tell them you are innocent. I couldn't live with myself knowing what I was doing, and also know you were tearing my family away from me.

"Don't think I have forgotten what happened to Shigure when you parted ways. He was so ill. I know that even if I erase your memories and make them stay away that you have your web weaved so tightly around him that even without your risky presence I would lose my family."

Nami sobbed, "I am not a murderer. I don't want anyone dead because of me anymore."

"You admit that your father died because of you then? You can see the truth," Nami bit her lip unable to deny that fact so Akito continued, "I don't want to erase your memories and be the bad guy. I don't want to lose a member of my family because of you. But if you really are sorry for all the duress you have caused there is something you can do to redeem yourself. You must make those three hate you. Make them realize what a terrible person you are and then leave on your own accord. They will be devastated they were deceived, but there is nothing I can right from that. They will rebound and carry on with their lives as it once was. Their hatred will help them move on."

"I can't…" Nami tried to congregate a thought against the demons haunting her in her head.

"If you don't I can't promise not to try something like this again. I detest you Nami and nothing good will ever come from you despite what you may make others believe."

"I am going to the bathroom," Nami left unable to look at anyone else in the hospital.

She fled into a single bathroom and sobbed. She tried to make herself stop by throwing water on her face, but she couldn't. She never wanted anyone dead. It was never supposed to be that way. She wanted to think clearly about what Akito's argument was and see the flaws in it, but anytime she would think of him all she could see was him in a tub stained with his blood. All she could see was Aya standing there shocked and no doubt scarred from it. How could she tell them this wouldn't be Akito's last attempt without bringing her past into the equation? How could she let people get hurt more just for her happiness? If she ignored Akito and went down this path and fell in love with Hatori and went back to how she wanted so desperately life to go…Hari would go to Akito again and then what?

Nami left the bathroom knowing too much time had passed already without seeming suspicious. She walked into the room and saw the three men she loved so much. Hari turned around hearing her and smiled. There was no way he was happy, it was apparent in his smile, but he was trying to make her feel better. Nami tried to swallow the lump in her throat away. She went back to her chair in the far corner and hoped nobody would talk to her soon and be clued in on her mental desperation.

"I am sorry to interrupt this, but visiting hours are over," the nurse glanced over toward Hari, "of course if Dr. Sohma still has some business he is more than welcome to stay."

"I think I will stay here just and do a once over myself just to make sure everything is in perfect order. I know how busy everyone is here," Hari put on his professional tone.

Shigure and Ayame said their farewells to Akito while Nami wanted nothing more than to get out of that room. Hari led all three of them to the doorway and turned to Nami, "don't wait up I may be late. You don't have to worry about my things in your car either just take it easy."

"Alright," Nami knew her tone was flat but she couldn't concentrate to do anything more.

She noticed Hari give a meaningful glance toward Shigure and Aya and then spoke up again, "Shigure you are more than welcome to stay at my place if you want to be close until Akito gets out."

Nami's heart sunk. She wanted nothing more than to have some time to herself and figure everything out. If Shigure was going to be staying he would defiantly notice and prod into her mood change especially since it happened right after her talk with Akito. Hari surely suggested Gure stay with them because it was more practical, but she couldn't help but feel it was also so she could be watched.

The drive from the hospital to the estate was short and neither of the guys said a word. Shigure decided to break the silence as soon as they got out, "let me help you with your things."

Nami was silent and went in the car to take Shigure up on his offer but when she saw Hari's doctor bag and knew Hatori wasn't around something snapped. She couldn't keep her precarious composure. She fell into the car and cried clutching the bag to her chest.

"Nami," Shigure spoke the name with almost every layer of emotion.

Aya reached in and put his hand on her shoulder, "it's okay."

Nami curled into the bag more and sobbed into it. The bag smelt of leather and Hatori's musk. She was so ashamed to be crying in front of Ayame and Shigure…as if they didn't have enough to worry about. She wanted to protect the bag and for it to be her shield. Nami was only vaguely aware Shigure and Ayame sat on either side of her. She had to give the bag back to where it belonged…out of her grasp.

Nami pulled away from her bag and into Shigure. He cradled her head and she sobbed into him for a little longer before he looked down, "let's go inside. I think it has been a hard day for everyone."

She nodded with residual sobs escaping as if she were still a child, and she was still clutching onto Hatori's bag while Ayame and Shigure took it upon themselves to bring everything else in. Once she got in the house she took a deep breath and put down Hatori's bag in his office. She flitted around and separated her things and tossing her stuff carelessly in her messy room. She put a teapot on the stove and sat at the table where Ayame and Shigure were waiting.

Nami thought it would be better if she initiated the conversation and have some more hope of directing it to where she wanted to, "so um, I am really sorry about earlier. There has just been so much to take in today I just wanted to say it really wasn't that big of a deal and I am sorry I am worrying you."

"You don't have to apologizing for showing us how you really feel. If something is troubling you we will always be there for you Nami," Ayame's hand brushed Nami's.

Shigure nodded and then continued, "your mood seemed to change drastically after talking with Akito alone. As much as I would like not to think of any ill toward him in this state with his track record I want to know if he said something to scare you. I just don't want you to be traumatized like you were the first time you met him."

"I guess the reality of what he attempted just hit me. I mean I know the two of us are defiantly not on the best terms, but that doesn't mean I would ever want anything like that to happen to him." Nami felt like her morality was crumbling with each word, "I just felt guilty like I kept Hari away this weekend when Akito did that. Not only that but what you must have felt Aya discovering him in that condition. I just…I feel so bad for you Aya you have that image to carry with you for the rest of your life."

Ayame took Nami's hand and put it on his face. Aya let himself relax into her hand and put his hand atop hers to draw it closer to his face. They sat there for a moment, and a tear streaked down Aya's face. The moment was only broken by the screeching of the teapot demanding Nami's attention.

Nami reluctantly pulled away, "I am sorry."

She turned her back toward them and poured out tea. She looked into the water and watched it steep. Watched how the tea tainted the clear water infecting it everywhere. She looked at it until there was nothing left of the clear water and her reflection was gleaning back at her on the dark surface. She sat at the table amongst the teacups.

"Oh I never got to ask how your trip was to the hot springs. Did you enjoy yourself?" Shigure tried moving on to a more a lighthearted conversation.

"It was extremely generous for you to send us there Gure. I really loved it. I was relaxed. It was interesting to see Hari act in that type of environment," Nami let a small smile crawl on her lips of the trip that seemed like a different world.

"Ohhh give us the details!" Aya gushed.

"About what?" Nami forced herself to take a sip of the tea.

"Anything romantic?" Shigure prompted as nonchalantly as possible.

Nami's eyes narrowed, "why would you suggest that?"

"Well I just think hot springs can be conducive with to romance. I mean all that and you have gone on a few dates with him?" Gure partly mumbled sipping his tea.

"Dates? You think I was on a date with Hari? If I was I was certainly not aware," Nami grew defensive.

Aya sighed and threw up his hands, "I mean do you really think you haven't? Ok maybe the first thing with the coffee shop didn't count, but do you really think Hari takes anyone to a fancy dinner right in the middle of Tokyo? I know something must have happened with the hot spring by the way you are avoiding it."

"The coffee shop was not a date! The dinner was just to make it up to me since he felt bad I was alone on New Years, and the hot springs it wasn't like we…well it was more circumstantial," Nami trailed not letting the thought of mutual feelings be planted in her head.

Aya let out a long sigh, "Nami I know you haven't had the best boyfriends in the past, but I didn't think you would be that dense. Hari didn't have to care you were alone on New Years. I mean did we ever take you out to dinner after?"

"Well…" Nami chewed on her lip.

"And what exactly happened that was 'circumstantial' at the hot sprint?" Shigure pressed.

"The owners thought I was Kana and the two of us were married. They gave us a single luxurious room, but it only had one bed. We told the hostess the problem and boy did she flip out. Hari slept on the couch that night and stuff. The next day the host offered us a full body massage which we accepted, but then he showed us to the same room for that with tables right next to each other. We decided not to correct him after how upset the hostess got. It would have been fine if he hadn't told Hari to do his husbandly duties and give me a massage and Hari actually accepted. I mean once the guy left I got him to stop and everything and we went to our separate hot springs. I just said a comment about…" Nami stopped there afraid to go on.

" About?" Aya leaned in closer.

Nami blushed, "it really doesn't matter you two are going to misconstrue it."

"Tell us," Shigure pleaded.

Nami really did not want to. Knowing that this could be her last night with them she sighed and caved, "I said the only downside to the hot spring was we had to talk through a fence and Hari invited me over to his side."

The boys looked at each other and then back at Nami. Shigure moved closer to Nami as if the proximity of his presence would help her understand, "I know you are not the most out going, but Nami we both know Hari very well. Believe me when I say that everything he is doing shows that he cares. He might be afraid to admit his emotions for you now after what happened with Kana, but this is not something to dismiss."

"Really Nami it is true Hari does like you a lot. Honestly is it really so bad? I mean do you feel the same way?" Aya spoke smoothly.

"I…" Nami didn't know what to say. She shouldn't even be having this conversation. She shouldn't be thinking about such silly things when she had to, "I don't think it would be wise to entertain the idea."

Nami stood up from the table and started walking to her room with her back toward the boys, "I am tired. It has been a long day I am going to bed."

There were no lights turned on in her room and she had no urge to change it. She collapsed in her bed. She knew she should not have just talked to Ayame and Shigure like that. She was only deepening her connection with them and maybe worse she had sowed the seed of the possibility Hatori loved her. Although she lay in bed sleep eluded her.

Not too much longer she heard Hari come home and his cousins greet him. Then their voices dropped low. Nami was grateful for that. She couldn't bear to hear what they were worried about. Shigure and Ayame probably thought her being with Hari would make him a better person. Make him happier. But she didn't deserve him. She didn't deserve their friendship because she…she was a bad person.

She tried closing her eyes but all that would flash before her eyes would be her father's dead corpse staring blankly back at her…blaming her. He wasn't perfect but that didn't justify what she put him through. What she made him do.

Silent tears flowed down her cheeks and occasionally she would lick her lips with a few salty tears staining her palette. Nami knew the right thing to do would confess what she before all of them. Spill out what she had been keeping from them and let them be the judge instead of Akito. She knew that would be the most fair thing to do, and she would just have to face whatever judgment they casted. As much as she knew she deserved to be detested and abhorred for what she did if they were to reject her…to tell her they couldn't stand her anymore, well it would be too much.

She lay in the abyss of a room and her mind shut down for a while, until she realized what to do. She had made her decision on how to move forward with her life.


	14. Chapter 14

I have to once again thank my readers for their dedicated reading of my story. You all are really great. I am so sorry that I got this one out late college is keeping me busy! I hope you are don't mind a serious plotline for a while, but every story needs conflict right? I hope you enjoy.

14

Brisk morning air slapped her face. Nami's black hair flowed freely in the wind and her ears were consumed with that familiar sound. With the wind consuming her senses she was able to forget everything even who she was and believe for a while she was one with the wind. She could float and go anywhere she pleased and not have a care in the world. She was determined that is what she would become and let the wind determine where she would go. Nami missed riding her motorcycle, and just found out today how liberating it was to ride with without a helmet and just be free. Because really, what did she care if she fell off and her head let out all of its time?

(Hari's POV)

Hari had gotten hardly any sleep last night and decided after waking up for the sixth time to just get up and get a cup of coffee. He was surprised at how late he "slept" in, but he didn't even turn into bed until 5. He rubbed his bleary eyes to check if the clock really did say 9:30 and sighed to see it did. Once his coffee was made he sat at the kitchen table where he spent most of his night talking last night and noticed a note.

To whoever gets this note,

I can't do this anymore. I just can't. You have been very hospitable to me Hatori, but I can't stay here anymore. I can't love somebody who is cursed. I have been deluding myself that I actually could all these years. Instead it was because of your family I was being held back. I realized it was sucking me in too and that is the reason why I have no friends and get hurt so much by you. Seeing what Akito tried to do to himself because of you curse people…I don't want to be hurt in the same way. So I have to thank you for letting me stay here and realize the truth. I won't tell your secret I will do everything to forget you so I suggest you do the same.

~Nami

Hari read the note several times trying to understand it. He got up and rushed to Nami's room and just let himself in. He pulled down the sheets, but nobody was there. He checked behind the stacks of paper. He tore through the room thinking this was some sick joke or he was actually in a nightmare. He clutched the paper to him and his knees buckled and he fell to the floor that was covered in paper. Her words and stories…they were the only remnants of her.

Hari must have been louder and more frantic sounding than he thought because Shigure came in the room and found Hari there. He rushed over to Hari's side and threw his arm around him, "Hari what's wrong?"

Hari couldn't talk and just handed the crumpled paper to Shigure. After reading it once Shigure placed the paper on the floor and cried. Tears blurred the ink and concealed what once was the true message on the papers around him.

(Nami's POV)

She had never been here before, but now seemed like it would be the first and last time she would ever come. She trudged through the grave site and until she finally found his grave. It was small and in one of the worst area's but they were never rich. Nami placed incense on her Father's grave and lit it and left some prayers. She knew she should have prayed, but couldn't bring herself to. She stared at the marble longer until the winter wind blew at her again and she knew she was off.

Nami jumped on her bike and was grateful for the leather jacket and how well it cut the wind. Her jeans were a little tight, but maybe she could afford some space in her tiny trunk for an extra pair. she had leftover from selling her car.

She still felt a bit uncomfortable driving through town. She had hoped she changed enough these past years that nobody would recognize her. Nami remembered her secret get away from her dad when she was young, and if she was never to return to Tokyo again she might as well visit there even if she did have to pass her old apartment complex.

Nami parked her sleek black motorcycle on the curb and walked tore off her shoes despite the freezing temperatures. She sprinted toward the beach and relished how the sand fit to her feet perfectly. She stood right at the shore and rolled up her jeans letting the frigid water lap against her feet. She looked out toward the horizon and saw a few fishing boats. The blue ocean took a grey hue mimicking the sky. She was letting all of her senses bask trying to empty out her thoughts and cares. She wanted the ocean to lap away her sins.

A small rock broke her mental detox as her eyes fluttered open scanning the scenery until her eyes locked with her old neighbor Ms. Natsuke. Ms. Natsuke had another rock or shell gripped in her hand and glared until she finally shouted, "we don't need the likes of you here. I can't believe you would have enough gall to come back after what you did."

Nami thought she tried throwing something again, but she was already at a full out sprint to her bike. She hurriedly threw on her shoes and flung herself on her bike screeching into the distance. She blew through her old neighborhood hoping nobody else would take notice to her and went a less traveled road in hopes there would be no cops. The wind blew away her tears and it started to snow.

Nami found a cheap diner that looked like nobody would want to bother her there. She settled in and her waitress came, "what do you want to drink?"

The waitress was about middle aged and looked worn. Why had she never moved on past a serving job? Her hands were full of burns likely due to her occupation. She may be tired because she is supporting a kid? Maybe her husband has been grating on her for years? Maybe she is like Nami and doesn't have anybody.

"Are you going to order or what?" She snapped.

Nami blinked, "oh sorry. I just want some coffee to start with."

The waitress gave her one mean glance before she scurried off. Nami took a napkin and pulled out her pen. She had to write a character sketch. She knew it would probably never be put to use since she threw away her old job she worked so hard for, but still she couldn't help herself.

When she finished with her meal she made sure to give the waitress an extra large tip. She hoped that would brighten her day a bit. Nami wanted to be with people and just get lost in their presence. She walked through a marketplace and thought about shopping. She wouldn't have anywhere to put anything so she just meandered around absentmindedly and watched people interact with one another, and yearned to do the same.

"Get a hold on yourself it hasn't even been a day," Nami shook her head.

Her heart ached at the thought she would never get close to anyone again. For all anyone cared she could be dead, and the saddest part is nobody would know the difference. She could not cave in though. Every person she ever got close to she only ever hurt. She would not allow for that anymore. She wouldn't be the root of pain anymore. Now she would haunt the world while she was still alive.

(Hari's POV)

The only thing that showed Nami had really gone was that her car wasn't parked in the front of the Sohma estate. Other than that nothing had changed. Hari walked to the hospital alone because Shigure refused to visit Akito since he was convinced he was behind it. Hari wasn't thrilled to visit Akito either, but to abandon him in this state was unacceptable. He wondered what Aya and Shigure were doing back there. It started to snow and Hari wondered where she was.

"Welcome Dr. Sohma!" The same nurse at the front desk was chipper and then hesitated, "are you alright? You look pale."

"I am just visiting my family member," Hari walked by not paying much mind.

He walked into Akito's room silent. He didn't know what to do or say. In this state Akito really did look pathetic, but what he had done. No it wasn't positive yet. Maybe they had to accept the fact that nobody from the outside could love them. Maybe Nami saved herself from the same fate that Kana went through. He was cursed.

"How are you feeling Akito?" Hari sat down in the chair closest to Akito.

"Where are Shigure and Ayame?" Akito turned his head toward him.

"They said they couldn't come today. They are upset."

"Upset? About what?"

"Nami left today and swore never to return and would do everything in her power to forget us."

Akito looked genuinely dejected except for the smallest crinkle by his eyes, "I am so sorry to hear that. I knew it. I just knew that bitch would hurt my family and look what she did. No more exceptions. We must not associate ourselves with the outside like this ever again. Look at what it brings. They don't understand our pain. Its better off she left. She was a bad person."

Hari's eyes hardened, "she may have been a lot of things, but Nami was nothing but selfless."

"Oh Hari I didn't want to tell you this…"

"What?"

"She is a murderer," Akito stared right into Hari to measure his reaction.

"How can you even begin to think that?" Hari clenched his fists.

"I was doing research on where exactly she had come from. I knew I should have done it before she came to live with us, but everything was so rushed. I visited her old neighborhood when you were at the hot spring. I had looked up where she had attended school for most of her life and wondered why she transferred and was homeless that whole time. I found her old address and hoped to find her parents there to talk to them and let them know where she was in hopes that they still lived there or somebody knew where they had moved.

"I talked to the landlord and found out that Nami's mother had died in childbirth so she had been raised by her father. When I asked for him she told me she had murdered him and fled before the cops ever arrived. A neighbor found him and had to call the authorities. She didn't even go to his funeral," Akito confided.

Hari's head shook almost involuntarily, "just because you heard from one person doesn't mean…"

"No I asked around the other neighbors and they agreed. I even went to the police department to check and they showed me the files of her father's death and since they couldn't find Nami and had insufficient evidence they couldn't charge her.

"Hari it drove me mad that I had let a murder in our home. The Sohma's have been paying for her secrecy the entire time. The apartment was in Shigure's name not hers, and now she went so far as to live with us. I had let a murderer become dear to my family. She's the reason I am in here. I even asked her yesterday if she had killed her father and she admitted to it. Now the day after she fled and is nowhere to be found. She is a killer Hatori."

(Nami's POV)

Night fell so early in the winter. Nami had found a cheap motel to stay in for the night and was left sitting in front of the T.V with bad reception. She had flipped through all the channels several times and stayed on a game show drinking happoshu.

The next morning she awoke with a slight headache but refused to spend the day in here like an alcoholic. With her endless amounts of freedom she was going to travel all around Japan. Once she had seen everything she wanted to she would sell her motorcycle and jump on a plane to America where she could have a real motorcycle adventure. She would find a Harley and try to remember the English they taught at school. For whatever reason though she still wasn't completely ready to leave Tokyo yet. Everything she knew and believed was formed here. To think she would never return…it was strange. So she vowed today would really be her last day here, but she would make the most of it.

She had worked herself in a halfway decent spirit. Sure every time she saw a couple or friends laughing she thought she might break down and cry, but she was in charge of her own destiny now. When she walked ready to be greeted by her only companion, her motorcycle it looked like it had found some friends.

"Nami it has been such a long time," an all too familiar voice drifted into her ears.

"Kaori," Nami's skeletons were flooding out of her closet, "what brings you here?"

He came up and took her face in his hands, "it has been so long since we have seen each other. Yesterday you were meandering around the middle of our territory flaunting your presence around, and how you embarrassed me."

Nami's mind had been so preoccupied with other things she had totally forgotten the reason she fled to this area was because she used to do the same thing when she fled from the Sohma's the first time. Nami couldn't believe her incompetence, "uh well Kaori I really won't be in Tokyo any longer so don't worry. So if you just let me…"

"Oh no you are not getting off that easily. You know when you left me I was heartbroken. You left me for those two brothers of yours. I mean they could never satisfy you in the ways I could."

"I couldn't hurt them anymore."

"And that is where your story gets interesting isn't it. I dug up some dirt on you and found your hometown. You really killed your dad?"

Nami couldn't say anything and he continued, "well that is where this gets interesting. You know the first thing you have to do to join is to kill someone. I think you have potential, and the way your new style is going…well you look hot."

"You really are that repulsive that no other girl would go for you," Nami looked straight into his eyes.

Kaori slapped her as hard as possible against her face. Nami staggered back and fell into another member that ripped her arms behind her back. Kaori went in to punch her in the stomach and his voice dropped to a dangerous low, "now remember who you are dealing with. It's that tongue of yours that gets you in so much trouble. Now here is what you are going to do. You will accompany me to my daily activities today and tonight you will remind me how much I need you."

"Over my dead body," Nami spat at his shoes.

Kaori punched her harder than before, "now if you refuse I think there is really only one way you could repay me for all the embarrassment you caused me, and I wouldn't even mind for my friends to enjoy themselves either."

Nami shivered unable to keep her cool demeanor, "fine."

Kaori's eyes narrowed still not completely convinced so Nami put up her best act, "I must have been out of my mind for a minute. I still am a bit shaken up by my brother's rules. I have been good for so long now I had been hesitant to go back to the real way to live. Now if your friend will let go of me I think I can show you a hint of what will come tonight."

Kaori nodded to the member behind him and Nami could feel her arms pulse. She tried to push herself out of her own body as she walked up to Kaori. She pushed herself against him and forced her tongue in his mouth and then let his dominate. She pulled away and winked, "I promise the only time I will be bad is with you late at night. Now why don't you drive me around and test out my new ride. I just bought it today."

Kaori caught the keys that were thrown at him by Nami and he let out an impish smile. When Nami clutched on to a man who stank of overpriced cologne and whiskey and she closed her eyes wishing she was anywhere else in the world. How did everything fall apart so fast? Why couldn't she have had a normal childhood? Why did she make this hugely bad decision to associate herself with the Yakuza? If she hadn't done those things could she be with Hari right now? She was so scared. She never meant for anything to get this bad.

Kaori was showing her off to all his friends and told them how she was begging to come back to him. How he was so gallant and took her back. How good in….How did her boys take her leaving? Were they upset? Did Akito tell them already and they were relieved they got such a wretched thing out of the house?

"Nami," his sleazy voice penetrated to her consciousness.

She put on a flimsy smile, "yes?"

"Why don't you sit on my lap and snuggle. I can see how eager you are for the night to come," his ego could suffocate the entire room.

Nami tittered, "oh that will make it so much easier to feed each other."

Nami didn't have to say or do much. She just had to act adoring around Kaori's lackeys which he was surrounded by constantly. There had to be a way to get alone with him, but he was too obsessed showing off his new prize.

Nami's heart raced as an idea hit her. She leaned in to whisper in his ear, "can I get you alone now?"

Kaori was beside himself, "now you will have to wait for that for tonight. How long has it been for you?"

"Don't worry I haven't lost my touch. I want tonight to be perfect though to celebrate our reunion. I was thinking we could stop by a shop and buy some toys to spice things up. I would be too embarrassed to do it in front of your friends though, and I think the stores might close soon," Nami's punctuated her sentences with kisses.

"Of course we can do that," He smiled.

She clung on more tightly than ever before. She was putting everything on the line here. Kaori misinterpreted her actions, "you really can't get close enough can you love?"

"I'm embarrassed to say so," Nami buried her face in his leather jacket.

The motorcycle stopped and Nami's heart thrummed. It came down to the next few moments. She couldn't screw it up. Kaori took out the keys from the ignition and got off and turned toward Nami. She got off and fell into him, and Kaori caught her instinctively.

"Thanks," Nami planted a kiss on his lips while her hands were still interlocked with his. In the middle of the kiss she threw her knee up to his groin and took the keys from his weakened grasp. She threw herself on the bike and revved the engine flying off as quickly as possible. Kaori recovered more quickly than she hoped and started screaming profanities accentuating his verbal abuse with gunshots.

Nami heard the bullets flying and she swerved in and out of lanes to make herself as hard of a target as possible, but she was in the middle of Yakuza territory. When some others saw what she had done to a prominent member there were more gunshots even after she got out of Kaori's range. Nami's blood pulsing in her ears and navigating the road was what took up all of her senses.

Nami sped past a park and was on the outer rim of Yakuza threat. She was going to make it and wouldn't stop driving until her motorcycle ran out of gas. She was almost free again and would not make the same mistake of staying in Tokyo ever again. Her fast paced chase scene would be her farewell to the only place she ever knew.

She was going to travel. She was going to be free. She wondered if there were parks like this one in America. She was going to be free. She was…

A child in the street chasing after a ball. A mother's voice screaming. He would die because of her.

Nami jerked her handlebars too quickly to the right and leaned all of her weight in the same direction. Her body hit the pavement and was being dragged and ripped along while the entire weight of the motorcycle fell upon her. Her head bounced off the black road and her vision dissolved into the same shade.


	15. Chapter 15

Hope you like this chapter as always. An important update… now that I am in the throngs of college and ridiculously busy I am considering publishing once every two weeks so if you don't see an update next week consider it my sign to you guys that is how this story is going be published from now on. I haven't 100% decided on the two week thing though so I guess we will see.

15

(Hari's POV)

Hari was never one to avoid people or things. He could always keep a cool façade, an even demeanor. Nothing ever got to him, he was the frozen snow how could it? Yet here he was in the ER avoiding home, but unable to go to Akito's room like he should. At home there was Shigure, and looking at the state he was in was a reflection of how Hari felt. At home there were remnants of her everywhere.

That is what brought Hatori to the hospital. Yet he couldn't bear facing Akito when he knew he was the one responsible for Nami's leaving. Hari had to obey him to leave Nami alone with him. Though Akito seemed perfectly convinced that Nami was in fact a murderer, but Hari couldn't believe that. Akito could manipulate emotions and make you say anything. The ER was limbo for Hari, unable to go back home, and unable to move forward and talk to Akito like nothing had happened. He fell into an institutional worn chair trying to push everything away.

"Get the room set up we have fresh road kill," a paramedic called down the hall to a nurse.

The paramedic on the other side of the gurney looked over, "I don't know about this one. She wasn't even wearing a helmet."

Hari could have been so many other places. He didn't even belong in the ER. Yet here he was sitting in a place he didn't even belong and the squealing gurney made him look up curious to see who was more unfortunate than him right now. As a good reminder things could be a lot worse.

He didn't know how much worse it could get.

Despite the torn skin caked in blood he could recognize that face anywhere. It was Nami. He was seeing Nami right now, and she was right next to him for a moment until she flew by down the hallway.

Hari didn't even think and ran after the paramedics, "wait I know her! What happened?"

The first paramedic glanced back worriedly, "uh buddy why don't you just sit in the waiting room?"

They flew into a room and Hari stopped right before the doors. It was too much. He walked to the opposite side of the hallway and crumpled to the floor. This had to be some sort of sick nightmare. The frenzied atmosphere allowed him to sit in the hall without anyone paying attention. What he would give to be a trauma doctor instead of a family practitioner. Maybe he could help instead of just sit here as a useless lump. So many people flew in that room and a few flew out spattered in blood…her blood.

The two paramedics came out of the room and stopped in their tracks seeing how Hari was still waiting up. They glanced toward one another and approached him.

One had a gentle face, "you really do know that girl don't you?"

Hari just nodded and the paramedic continued, "why were you waiting in the ER then if you are as shocked as you look?"

"I have a family member in here in the critical care unit. I was on the way to that," Hari's voice felt like it could crumble away at any minute, "you must see this kind of thing every day. Do you think she'll make it?"

"Well I just bring them here and don't usually see the results so I can't say," his hand was on Hari's shoulder.

The other paramedic stood a distance away, "hey we have to go."

The gentle paramedic nodded to his coworker and stared back with sincere eyes, "you know she avoided hitting a little kid and took too sharp of a turn to do so. She tilted her bikes weight so it would fall on her instead of him is what everyone told us. She seems like a very good person."

They left and Hari was left in the hallway again. Nobody had entered or exited her room in quite some time. Was she suffering? Was she dead and they were trying to revive her? Why wasn't she wearing a helmet? Was there even a chance she would survive with those conditions?

How long was he lost in his thoughts and staring at the white door filled with scuffs? He couldn't even guess, but soon Nami was on a gurney flying through the hallways again and Hari chased her refusing to lose her again. He would have followed her to wherever they were taking her, but a doctor just coming out or the room called out after him, "I am sorry to say but authorized personal are allowed here. If you are waiting for someone the nurses at the front desk at the waiting room will notify you at the chance to visit."

Hari stopped in his tracks and flashed his card, "is she alive?"

"Do you know her?" the doctor started to grow wary.

"She lives with me." Hari ignored the lump in his throat, "her name is Nami."

The doctor sighed, "for now she is alive. It is amazing she didn't die on impact really. Without wearing a helmet it is really a miracle. Her injuries are extensive and they are going to give her a CAT scan to see the extent of brain damaged she has."

"Can you tell me anything about her condition currently," Hari tried to sound professional and wondered if it was working at all.

The doctor licked his lips, "it is not looking too good. A lot of her bones are broken from the weight of the motorcycle and she was in shock for a while in there from the blood loss. We already got her stabilized from shock and the bones will heal with some physical therapy. Those aren't the real problems…I just don't know how extensive her brain injuries are or if her neck is broken. If her brain isn't swelling right now I am not sure if she will come out of her coma."

Hari nodded with his mouth completely dry. The doctor furrowed his brow and put his hand on Hari's shoulder, "you should go to the waiting room. I will make sure as soon as any information comes up on her you will be notified immediately."

Hari simply nodded again still unable to talk, and knew he needed a place to sit. The doctor sat him down and gave him one more pitiful glance before he left. Hari was shaking and was concentrating on just breathing regularly. He knew he should not call Shigure until Nami's condition was clear one way or another, but Hari needed him there right now. He couldn't face this alone. He pulled out his phone that was convulsing in his palm.

"Sohma residence," Shigure sounded worn, but at least he was answering.

Hari couldn't talk. He didn't know how to give the news so Shigure spoke up again, "hello? Is anyone there?"

"Shigure," Hari's voice cracked.

Shigure was immediately put on the defensive, "are you alright Hari? What happened?"

"It's Nami…"

"Nami you found her? Is she okay?"

"She had a motorcycle accident. She is in the ER now." Hari's voice was hollow, "I am in the waiting room."

"I will be right there." Shigure's voice bled into the dial tone.

Shigure must have run to the hospital or Hari was zoning out more than he thought. Shigure looked like a mess, and no doubt reflected Hari's state. Shigure found Hari in an instant as if he could detect the most desperate man in the room. Shigure sat next to him not really believing why he was here.

"How did you find out about all this? Did she ask for us?" Shigure thought of the only hopeful thing.

Hari shook his head, "I was avoiding my responsibilities to visit Akito and wound up in the ER. They brought her in there."

There was a silence for a little while before Shigure continued, "so…uh…how bad is it?"

"It's not completely determined yet," Hari couldn't bring himself to tell Shigure. Cowardice seemed to be the only thing he knew how to do lately, "where is Aya?"

"I think he has reached his breaking point. He couldn't stand waiting in the hospital constantly being reminded of the severity of the situation and just to tell him the outcome either way," Shigure seemed to be slipping from reality a bit too.

The wait was still long and excruciating, but Hari took solace in that he was not alone in anxiety. Somebody was going through the same thing and could relate. He wasn't happy Shigure was upset, but it was easier to bear this way.

The doctor Hari met earlier came out and walked right up, "may I have a word with you?"

"Of course. This is my cousin Shigure, and he was very close with Nami as well," Hari said to clue in Shigure as well as the doctor.

"Walk with me," the doctor strode down the hall of the ER.

Hari's heart raced. Walking away in a private corridor was never a good sign. It usually meant the doctor had little confidence in the news they were about to give. The doctor stopped in the critical care unit which even if Nami wasn't in the equation Hari felt guilty being here.

"Well she seems to have a very hard head. Her brain isn't swelling and her skull only has micro factures that should heal on their own. The bad news is that she is in a coma, and there is no telling when she will get out of it," the doctor looked like he could use a smoke, but Hari was probably projecting.

Shigure spoke up, "but it is a when she will wake up not if."

The doctor broke eye contact with Shigure, "I can't guarantee anything. It really is amazing that she is still alive with how little safety equipment she was wearing."

Hari could see Shigure turn white so he spoke up instead, "is there anything else?"

"Well…" the doctor seemed to be measuring his words, "the police just came in and told us about the scene. Several eyewitness said that she was fleeing from the Yakuza. I take it by your reactions that you are just as surprised as we were. I just wanted to let you know to watch out. That type isn't forgiving and cause more injuries here than we would like to admit. If you would like to see her she is in that room."

Hari started for the doorway but noticed that Shigure was just standing there watching the doctor go off in the distance, "Shigure?"

He didn't respond and just walked in the room that the doctor pointed out. Hatori followed worried not only for Nami's condition, but Shigure's mental condition as well.

Shigure sucked a sharp breath in and stood in the middle of the room for a minute before proceeding for bed. He stood directly over her and looked for a while until he collapsed on his knees clinging on the sterile sheets and sobbing into them. Hari wanted to join so badly. He wanted more than anything to break down and just indulge himself in giving into his emotions, but that would solve nothing and only worry Shigure more.

Hari walked over to Shigure and placed a hand on his back while Shigure sobbed, "it's our fault. She was being threatened by the Yakuza. We just let her go. I promised her that…"

"Shigure, you can't blame yourself for this. What if she went for the Yakuza herself? What if it was just a random meeting? She still could have run away from us and our curse. We can't allow ourselves to believe she still has any amiable feelings toward us." Hari was saying more to himself than to Shigure, "she still could be a mur…."

Shigure flashed a sharp look, "you don't really believe that she is like that do you? It's one thing for Akito, but you Hari? She is not a murderer. She would do anything for anyone if it meant they would be better off."

Hari said nothing and fell into a chair in the far corner of the room. He wanted more than anything to believe Shigure. Believe she still did care for the Sohma's . Believe she would wake up and be overjoyed to see them and tell them this whole thing was a misunderstanding. But it was too much to hope for. They were cursed, and anyone they brought in close to them from the outside would fall into their cycle too. How could he let this happen again? He should have learned his lesson with Kana. He had to freeze not even be snow, but turn to ice. Even outsiders can leave their footprints in snow, but ice is impermeable.

Shigure still hadn't moved and Nami of course didn't improve, "I'm going to see Akito now. It has been a while since anyone visited."

Shigure didn't even respond to him. Hari had only seen someone be so consumed with grief once before, but there was nothing he could do for Shigure. Akito's room was only a few doors down from Nami's, and Hatori wished it was on another wing to buy him more time. No, he had spent enough time avoiding reality.

Hari peeked his head in Akito's room, "how are you feeling?"

"Ah you haven't forgotten about me," Akito didn't look toward Hari, but kept his sight fixated on the ceiling.

Hatori sat down in a chair next to him, "how could I forget? You can be so ridiculous."

Akito turned over and touched Hari's face, "you're upset. You look haggard."

"I have just had a few things weighing on me is all."

"You would confide in me won't you Hatori? You know I would always listen. I want to be close to my family."

"I...I just am worried about Nami."

"Why?"

"I saw her be admitted in the ER today as paramedics were rushing her in. She was in a motorcycle accident, and was not wearing a helmet. It is really amazing she didn't die on the scene. The doctors here saved her, but she is still in a coma and it isn't clear she will pull out of it."

"Hatori you have always had such a caring soul," Akito crooned stroking his cheek, "but you can't let this drag you down as well. It is hard enough to see you emotionally tortured by her abandoning you when you need her the most. Now she shows up again and is scarring you further. You should forget about her, and take her out of your life completely. It would be so much better for you. Outsiders have only hurt you and will never understand the nature of our curse. Stay with me where you will be loved unconditionally."

Hari stood up and shook his head, "no. Akito you're wrong. She has shown me what it means to be alive. She made the most mundane things into small moments of happiness. She genuinely wanted to hear what was on my mind and respected me. It wasn't her that hurt me. I was the one that hurt her pretending like the curse never existed and she wouldn't be affected by living intimately with it. I…I don't know if you can understand. It is like explaining what the sun is without ever having being in it."

Hari started leaving until Akito pleaded, "you wouldn't leave me in this condition. Hatori we are family. Stay with me."

"I won't keep lying to myself and to you. I won't pretend I am okay with everything you decided to do. I can't stay," Hatori fled the room with his heart racing.

It was the first time in his life he disobeyed an order from Akito. It was terrifying, and exhilarating. He hardly knew what he was doing or why he was taking such irrational steps. As much as he knew he was genuinely hurting Akito he couldn't shake the undeniable feeling what he was doing was right…he should be exactly where he should be.

Hari looked up in the hall and had no clue where he had wandered off too and could not help but laugh at himself, and to defy the odds right now; because as grim as everything was he could not plunge into that reality without losing himself. He sucked a deep breath in and strode toward Nami's room. He would not leave it until there was a definitive outcome with her.

Right before Hari went in the room he saw a mother and a child that had a few bruises standing just outside of Nami's room. He walked up to the pair, "are you looking for someone?"

The boy coward behind his mother and she smiled, "oh not really. I just…you wouldn't happen to know that girl in there would you?"

"Yes I do, she is very dear to me," Hari wasn't ashamed to say it out loud.

The mother looked like she was about to cry, "I just. I wanted to go in there and give her my gratitude, but well in the state she is in and the other man that is in there. I just didn't feel right interrupting. I should have kept a better watch on my son, but because of my negligence she is suffering. I mean she only had a split second to choose between…and she saved him."

Hari put a hand on her shoulder, "her name is Nami, and she is a very kind soul. It is just in her nature to put the well being of others before her own. She never regretted living like that so I am sure she would not you to suffer like you are now."

"You are a very kind man. You both seem like very good people. Here is my number. Please call me to tell me what happens to her either way," the mother slipped him a piece of paper.

"I will," Hari assured as he watched the mother walk away clutching her child.

He walked back in the room with Shigure slumped over in a chair with tear stained cheeks staring at everything and nothing. Hari sat down next to him, and despite the overwhelming calm that overtook him for a few moments there, being back in the room looking at how sever her situation brought him back closer to reality, a reality where Nami may never come out of her coma, one where he would have to decide to keep Nami in the state that she is now or pull the plug. Or maybe a reality where she wakes up and still hates them and orders them away. If she comes to could she even stand to see their faces again after running away?

Hari felt himself sinking to the state that Shigure surely was in…total desperation. He couldn't go there and not lose himself. What kept him afloat and treading the waters of despair was a small piece of driftwood of hope. That there was a chance of a reality where Nami would wake up and be overjoyed to him. That small improbable hope is what Hari clung with his life to, and prayed wouldn't disintegrate into nothing.


	16. Chapter 16

Hey guys sorry that this is a day late and you had to wait an extra week for it .. I am only two weeks away from midterms so a lot of things are due and the work load is ridiculous! I know it is not really a legitimate excuse, but whatever. Anyway I hope the chapter was worth the wait. Enjoy!

16

(Hari's POV)

How long had he been in here in the same room? How long had Hari been stranded at sea? Hari despised the florescent lights that were ever the same. How did anyone heal in a hospital with these as their only light source? The sun and some fresh air would revitalize people…let them know there was life beyond the sterile white walls; to let them know there was more than just the pain and suffering.

On the first night that Nami was brought to the hospital a nurse came in with a quiet voice, "I am sorry to interrupt, but visiting hours are over."

Shigure didn't even attempt to make a move so Hari got up to talk to her instead, "you know I am a doctor with privileges at this hospital. Though trauma may not be my forte I assure you I will not disturb the patient."

"I am sure you know what you are doing, but he will still have to go," the nurse seemed unsteady when asserting herself.

Hari glanced back debating whether or not to protest or not, but when he saw Shigure and the state he had worked himself into he nodded toward the nurse, "let me take care of that one."

She glanced over unsure if Hatori really would keep his promise, but gave into to her willingness to be a wallflower. Hari walked over to Shigure and saw he was fading fast. It would be better for Shigure to get out of these four walls.

Hatori kneeled before Shigure trying to look up into his unfocused eyes. Hari should have regretted bringing Shigure here, but he didn't. He didn't want any secrets, and Shigure had the right to know.

"Shigure visiting hours are over. You have to go home," Hatori prayed he wasn't in a catatonic state. When he didn't respond Hari's heart dropped, "Shigure?"

Shigure's eyes fluttered and focused, "you're leaving too?"

Hari shook his head which cause Shigure to protest, "then why me? I can't leave her. Not like this."

"Shigure you do realize you are an adult with a houseful of minors you abandoned. Leaving them alone for a few days because of an emergency is one thing, but staying that way for an indeterminate time…that is just not acceptable. They need you Shigure and right now you are abandoning them. I don't want you back in here in this room. I am not letting you slip into that depressed state once again. So go home and once there is a decisive factor I will call you," Hari hoped he wasn't too stern with Shigure.

"I am not leaving her because I don't care. You…she has to know. Please tell her when she wakes up. I just have too…" Shigure trailed.

Hari helped him out of his chair, "I will be sure to tell her."

Hari knew the reason Shigure left was not because he stopped caring for Nami, but because he cared for her too much. Hari walked Shigure out of the hospital and was nervous Nami would awake and be alone. He wanted more than anything to be there for her. He also had a deep wish she would be awake when he returned and this torture would end, but of course he didn't get his returning wish.

Hari knew it was better he was alone with her so if by some miracle she did wake up and did not want to see the Sohma's ever again Shigure would not have to bear the brunt of the situation. With each day that passed, it was a total of five now, Nami's chances of waking up would edge more and more miraculous.

He had never left the hospital, but despite only being a few doors down from Akito he refused to visit him. It was in part to punish Akito and let him know that he did have a backbone. What Hari was ashamed to admit though is that he was afraid if he did visit he would lose his ambition to Akito's demure words.

Akito was never alone though and at least one member of the Sohma family would visit him. It confounded Hari how Akito ever felt alone or unloved. He had more visitors than the average person in the hospital.

While Hari was pondering about everything he could while vigilantly watching Nami for any chance her eyes might flutter open he noticed another presence in the room. He didn't bother looking up assuming it was another nurse coming to give him food or check on Nami's condition.

"Hatori are you asleep or are you really so bold as to continue ignoring me?" _His _voice was abrasive to Hari's eardrums, "I am released today. Why don't you stop playing this childish game and come home?"

Hari wanted to shoot daggers out of his eyes, "Akito I am not leaving her side until she is conscious or dead."

Aya stood behind Akito taking in the severity of Nami's situation. Hari wanted to go over and console him. Tell him what he knew because he doubted Shigure could say much. Akito stood between them and continued on, "that is fine then."

He could not hide the shock on his face, "what?"

"I think it is a good thing you stay here the moment she is released from the hospital. That will make it that much more convenient to erase her memories. I will not house a murderer any longer," Aya looked away from Hari as Akito leered.

Akito strode out without another word. Aya looked back and silently apologized with his eyes. Hari sat stunned in his chair, and felt like led. There was no way to win. It was one thing to avoid Akito and not stay with him, but to ignore erasing a memory…what choice did he have? Unless he broke off all contact with his family…and Hari realized he was still being reprimanded like a child for a bad action. He was forced to choose between his family or her.

The driftwood was obliterated with Akito's presence.

Hari could feel every nerve ending being weighed down of the curse. He could feel how much of a freak he was. How he didn't belong in this world, and never would. How no matter how much he struggled to set himself free he would always be dragged back down because of who he was. He couldn't choose now...he couldn't. So it seemed the only option for Hatori was to slip away into unconsciousness where he wouldn't have to be himself, and live vicariously through anything else even if it were only for a few hours.

Hari felt himself being pulled out of the perfect blackness by the scuffling of feet. His eyes ripped opened excited and terrified it might be Nami's. The white lights blinded him for a moment, but after a few blinks he saw Nami had not changed one bit, and the shy nurse he had met the first night had returned.

"I am sorry to awaken you," her sentence was almost inaudible.

Hari rubbed his eyes, "it's fine."

There was a click of the tray with the stench of cafeteria food, "I don't mean to be so bold, and I hope you like some of the food on here, but I haven't seen you go to the cafeteria at all. If you keep that behavior up you could end up here as well."

Hari nodded completely repulsed by the thought of food. The nurse slipped away with her uniform blending in quiet well with the walls. She was a sweet nurse, but all Hari wanted to do was sleep. He didn't remember his dreams, but for a few hours he didn't have to think either or face the fact that no matter what happens to Nami there would be nothing to look forward to. Unless…could he even begin to think he could choose Nami over his family? Would he have the courage?

Time passed again, although if Hari was not wearing a watch it would be hard to believe. It was the sixth day he was here waiting. How long could he avoid responsibility? Had anyone gotten hurt or needed medical attention back home? It was tempting to go back for a few hours if only for a fresh pair of cloths, a shower, and a check on how everyone was doing; he knew he couldn't' The Sohma estate was a strong and powerful prison that one could get easily sucked into. He wouldn't leave her side until he knew the definitive outcome. There would be no more questions left unanswered if it within his grasp.

Hari looked up again to expecting to see the quiet nurse coming to take away his tray. He was ready to be reprimanded for not eating. Instead, Hari found a strange man looming in the doorway. Tattoos peeked above his crew neck collar. Hari was sure there would be a sleeve of tattoos on his arms if his leather jacket was not covering it. When he took a few steps forward he smelt of cologne and hair gel and Hari instinctively put himself before the bed.

"I don't think you should come in here any further," Hari glared and a dangerously low voice.

The man gave an over confident smile, "I don't think you are the one to be giving threats. You aren't that little tramps brothers…"

Hatori only stood a few inches before the vile man, "don't you ever call her that again."

The man let out a loud rolling laugh, "she musta pulled the wool over your eyes pretty badly huh? Listen you don't wanna fuck with me. I am part of the Yakuza and I am sure with the right dollar amount the police could turn a blind eye about a missing person."

The man tried to get past Hari, but Hari shoved the man back in front of him, "I suggest you leave Kaori and never dare to set foot near her again."

"I am that notorious you know my name by my street rep," Kaori walked to the side.

"Yes Nami did give a very accurate description of how hideous you were. I think she forgot to tell me of how ugly your face was, but maybe she had just blocked that part out her memory," Hari was feeling dangerous today. Really he was at his breaking point and this seemed like a perfect place to get all of his pent up rage out. What did he really have to lose?

Kaori went for the choke on Hari's throat with one hand, "are you looking for a fight just for this cunt? I swear you will never see the light of day again if you keep pressing me like this. Don't think you would be my first."

Hari said nothing and didn't try to do anything as the shy nurse came in and screamed. Kaori got so shocked he let go of Hari and turned to attack the nurse with the knife he was just about to use on Hari plummeting toward her. Hari didn't think and grabbed his arm just before it hit the nurse and punched Kaori in the back of the head at the base of the skull as hard as possible. In shock Kaori dropped his knife and Hari stomped on the back of his knees making Kaori face plant in the ground. Hari jumped on top of him and kicked the knife out of both their reach.

Only a few moments had passed since the nurse's scream and a few more female nurses came to the scene while one in the background was sobbing into the phone. A janitor down the hall pushed past the nurses and threw the rod of his mop on the back of Kaori's neck and rolling it back and forth to irritate the muscles even more.

Hari refused to get off of Kaori until the authorities arrived. The janitor stayed with Hari and the nurses coward just outside the door too afraid to help physically but ready to call for more help if needed. While Hari was waiting he thought it would be an appropriate time to make a personal interrogation for why he even showed up at all.

"What were you thinking showing your face around her?" Hari seethed into Kaori's ear.

"I wanted to make sure that bitch was dead for all of the humiliation she caused me. Doesn't matter though cause she isn't waking up from that. You can stay by a living corpse's side for all I care. I hope that cunt burns in hell," Kaori dared to laugh. Hari pushed next to the janitors hands and pressed harder on the rod of the broom for a moment then relaxed and kept his weight on Kaori's back.

The janitor looked over at the hospital bed, "you really love that girl huh?"

"I think we should concentrate on keeping him down until he is in hand cuffs," Hari didn't want to slip on this low life.

It wasn't too long after the police came and gladly arrested Kaori. They questioned Hatori for a while, but after seeing the choke mark coupled with several nurses eyewitness accounts he was free of charges. Once the police left Hari wanted nothing more than to sit down and be by himself, but the shy nurse and the janitor stayed in the room.

"Is that your girlfriend or wife?" The janitor looked directly into Hatori's eyes.

Hari shook his head, "she lived with me for a while."

The janitor's eyebrow cocked, "you live together and aren't even official? You both just need to come out and admit it already to each other."

"I hardly doubt she will be thrilled to see me. We had a…fight and she left home. The day after she left I find her in here in this state. I just wish…how can everything fall apart so quickly?" Hari wondered aloud being unusually open.

"I hope she pulls through," the janitor turned and left without another word.

"I do too," Hari sighed to himself and started to walk toward a chair.

"Um excuse me," the shy nurse was so quiet Hari had forgotten she was still in the room.

He spun around, "I am so sorry. Yes?"

"I don't mean to take up too much of your time. I just…I wanted to say thank you. You saved me," the nurse's face turned crimson.

Hari smiled his first genuine smile in what seemed like years, "it's not a big deal. You save lives every day. The world needs more people like you."

Her eyes flickered away for a moment, "I only hope I can help save what you cherish."

"I do too," Hari sighed.

She silently scuffled to the other side of the room, "you should really eat something. I will bring you dinner."

Hatori fell back into the chair by Nami's bed. He was almost positive that this day couldn't…well he had better not challenge fate right now. He took a few deep breaths in and tried to calm himself, and whished there was a way to drain all the excess adrenaline from his veins. He could have done something very irrational if the janitor had not come in…if that knife had been closer. Hari could hardly recognize himself. All these rash actions…it was ridiculous.

The shy nurse came in and placed some bland cafeteria food and a steaming cup of coffee before Hari. Hari glanced over at Nami and saw her lying there suffering. How could he even dare to eat? She sensed his hesitation and sucked in a breath, "if you really care for her she won't have to wake up to find that you are ruining your health just because something happened to her. Please eat."

The nurse dismissed herself blushing, and Hari knew that she was right. He decided to start with the coffee. He sipped and it seemed to go down easier than he expected. He finished his drink and took a few bites of his food, before his stomach started to protest. He could feel it disagreeing with the foreign invasion. He managed to keep down what he ate but moved the tray to the other side of the room. His appetite had already dissipated.

Hari had been warding off the thought the entire time he was in the hospital, but he couldn't ignore the constant buzzing in his head. What if she never woke up and it would all end between them with her bitterness? Hari's stomach dropped and he knew something had to be done.

He moved his chair next to Nami's head and sucked in a deep breath, "I know this seems crazy. I know this doesn't really do anything, but I have to say it out loud to your face even if you are not conscious to keep my sanity. Nami, I am so sorry for dragging you in to the family. I never knew you would get hurt…or had been hurting. I was fooled by your façade, and I am sorry for that. I wish I would have known what was really on your mind. If you were ever happy…I wish if you really couldn't stand it you would have asked me to erase your memories. I guess it doesn't matter anymore now though. I am sorry you are losing your friends. I guess your sharp tongue finally wore off on me. I wonder if you would be proud for standing up for myself? Nami…"

Hari continued his monologue to the unconscious body. It felt good to vent even if she couldn't respond. There was some small hope in him that if he kept talking like this somehow that would pull her out of her coma. He knew that wouldn't be the reason she would awake, but he kept going until his lids were too heavy to fight against. That worn chair had become his chair and his palm the pillow for his forehead.

Hari had dreamed, and by the buzzing in the hallways he could guess that it was morning. At first he couldn't tell the difference between the night thrum of life and the daytime buzz. The day time the halls were more chaotic, while the scuffling feet at night had some lag to them. It was the seventh day, a week, a quarter of a month he had been waiting. Would anything change? Would the nurses give him that impossible question today? It was tempting to slip back into unconsciousness and not face all these worries. Maybe then he would continue whatever dream he had.

Hari finally mustered the courage to open his weary eyes and was greeted by a splash of color against the sea of white. Green. It was really green he was staring into. He was afraid he was still dreaming. Afraid he would have to wake up to some brutal reality where he had already made the wrong choice.

"Nami," Hari's voice caught in his throat.

"Hari," a small voice…her small voice called paired with an impossible smile.

(Nami's POV)

Nothing can describe the shade of black she was caught in. It wasn't even like it was black as anyone knew it…but that was the closest thing Nami could think of to describe the total lack of any kind of stimulus she was facing. Nami had been swimming…floating...or whatever in this abyss forever. Right? Was there anything before or after? What was she even?

Something had changed. The nothingness lightened and there was still black. Lots of black, but it was more of a human black. The black dissolved slowly flickers of pinks, and then small slit of white. A sound…breathing? It was repetitive, yes she was breathing. Her eyes blurred and all there was only white with a splotch of black. Blinking was a dangerous endeavor, because after each blink there was no guarantee that she would be able to part her eyelids like she had previously. Still she refused to lose against her own self and eventually kept her eyes open.

Where was she? Hari was here sitting on a chair right next to her. He wasn't responding to her and she realized he was sleeping with his even breathing. Was she home in her room? Why was Hari in it? Nami turned her head with great difficulty and saw the endless amounts of white planes. Nami's hand twitched and brushed her leg and a sharp pain shot through her.

The pain jolted her memory. She was running from Kaori who was going too…well she got on her bike and got away. Why wasn't she on the road still? Nami blinked and the child right in front of her came into vision.

Despite how hard she tried to pull away from the Sohma's they somehow kept coming back. Hari was here waiting for her. Nami was about to revel in the glory of it all until her heart sank to her feet upon one realization. What if Akito didn't tell Hari what she had done? What if Hari didn't know about her past, and all the skeletons it bore?

Nami didn't let herself think. For a moment she was with Hatori. She didn't have the strength to worry anymore. Unconsciousness was tempting, but she didn't know when she would awake if she succumbed. She watched Hari and noticed details she hadn't earlier. He was relaxed, but just beneath his eyes there were dark shadows. His hair was a mess as if he hadn't looked in a mirror for days. Hari had been suffering.

That realization tore at her. If she had any strength she would go to hug him, and then couldn't help but laugh at herself. Such a simple impulse would have blown everything and caused a huge mess. Her weakness became her savior for the moment.

It was funny how time could become so obsolete especially when it used to dictate so much of her life. Life was passing by running normally while she was stuck here. She could fall right out of existence and only a few people would be affected. The rest of the world would just march on oblivious.

Right as she was entering some of her most dangerous thoughts a small action changed everything once again. Hari opened his eyes and Nami had the chance to look into the depths of those dark eyes not realizing how much she had missed them the few conscious hours she spent away from them.

"Nami," his voice was colored in relief and joy.

It was so obvious now why people go through such difficulties. It was because they lived for more than themselves, "Hari."


	17. Chapter 17

Hey guys thanks for being so patient and good readers! I really cannot tell you all how much it means to me to know I have a dedicated group like yourselves and get to see new reviews too! I am about to finish up midterms and go on spring break and I cannot wait for the break. Hopefully, I will get a lot of writing done then. Please enjoy!

17

(Nami's POV)

After saying each others names a silence fell between them. Where could they even begin?

Nami sucked in a deep breath, "are you okay?"

Hari started laughing much to Nami's surprise, "you do realize you are the one in the hospital bed don't you?"

"Well you look awful. I mean when was the last time you even slept in a bed?" Nami's brow furrowed.

"A thousand apologies for not primping properly for you," Hari bowed in his chair.

Nami looked away, "you shouldn't even be here."

His face fell and Nami immediately wished she could eat those words. This shouldn't be happening though. He wasn't supposed to know or care if she was dead or alive. She was supposed to be hundreds of miles away.

"So you really are angry with me? I just wish you could have told me and asked me to…"

Nami cut Hari off unable to take anymore, "I don't hate you. I could never hate you Hari."

"Then why did you leave?"

"I just…I am not a good person."

"Why do you say that? You know Akito told me that you weren't a good person either. I haven't talked to him since that day because he said such ridiculous things. He even went so far as to say you killed your own father."

"You don't believe him?"

"Should I? I find it impossible to believe."

Nami closed her eyes like a child afraid to see how their parent would react, "I did."

She couldn't stand the silence any longer and needed to see Hari's reaction. He was just sitting there staring into nothing, "I think it would have been better if that accident had just killed me."

That caught his attention and his eyes burned, "never say anything like that again."

"But I'm a…." Nami's worst fear was playing out where she couldn't escape Hari's reaction.

He kept a perfectly even composure, "how did you do it then?"

"Are you serious? Why do you wanna know?"

"I think…you saying it can be the only way I can actually believe it, and come to terms."

"I…well…I ruined everything. If I had never been born none of this would have happened. It would have been better," Nami couldn't control the tears sliding down her face.

Hari wiped away a tear, "you would have never have made the Sohma boys so happy."

Nami pulled away from Hari and shook her head, "I wouldn't have upset you or ever made anyone worry. All I do is bring death or sadness. My mother died because of my birth and I robbed her life for my own. I stole my father's love and drove him crazy. I looked just like my mother…my presence was a constant reminder of the one he had lost, and it was a constant reminder of how I stole her life from him. It was because of me his life was irrevocably broken and he had to go to such extremes to escape his brutal reality. He was just hanging there when I got home from school…."

"So he killed himself?" Hari's voice was completely flat.

"No I was the one who made him do it because I existed," Nami managed between sobs.

Hari leaned over Nami's bed so his face was only inches from hers, "you didn't kill anyone. There was a chemical imbalance in his head Nami, and because of that it made him make a very bad decision on his own. You did not kill anyone. You are innocent."

"I'm a murderer. Everyone in my neighborhood knows, Akito knows, and now you do too. You know what I really am. It would have been better if I had…"

Hari placed his finger on Nami's lips, "you are a beautiful human being that has given people a reason to live a happy and fulfilling life."

"No I haven't."

"For me you have. I have been so happy when I was with you. Nami you can't let the abuse of your father and Akito drag you down. You can't let others define you especially when they are mentally ill."

"Hari you have to hate me for hiding what I am, and Shigure after seven years…."

"Hate you for having a resilient soul? Hate you for being selfless and perceptive? Are those things I should hate you for because Nami that is what you are," Hari stared right into her eyes, but they were so far away somewhere in the deep recesses of fear.

She had been reduced to sobs and nothing could get through to her. Hari recognized the state and knew it too well. He fell into his chair and rubbed his temples. How could he have made the same mistake twice of dragging innocent people into the Sohma curse?

"Akito was released from the hospital yesterday," Hatori looked up to see if he had grabbed her attention. Even though he hadn't he continued, "I need to erase your memories now. It will be easier for you. I will make sure you have a place to go when you get released and your life will resume once again as a writer. Your guilt will be alleviated. I am sorry I dragged you into my curse, but you have made me very happy."

Nami stopped crying but she lay there unresponsive after Hari was finished talking. He let out a long sigh and stood up. When he started to lean forward she grabbed the remote with her finger hovering over a red button to call the nurse and glared up at him, "don't you dare."

"I promise it won't hurt," Hari crooned.

"Stop!" She let out a shrill cry, "stop it now! You can't do that to me! If you lean any closer I will make sure to hit this button and scream at the top of my lungs for someone and get you thrown out here if that is what it takes."

"You are suffering because of me."

"Hari if you meant anything what you said about me ever making you happy why in the hell would you be so eager to erase everything? I can't forgive myself for what I did to my father. I don't know if I ever will, but you erasing my memories of the only good thing that happened in my life well what will that solve? The Sohma's are what make me keep going and believing that there is still some good in the world. I don't wanna face the world by myself…I don't think I can."

He fell back in his chair and her finger was still hovering over the red call button. She was leering at Hari still, "what makes you think you know what is best for me? If I didn't like the Sohma's or you were the ones making me suffer don't you think I would let you know?"

"Wasn't that why you left?"

"No. Not at all. It was…it was because I was, no I still am, a coward. I have always been a coward. I ran away from my house because I was afraid of getting locked up in jail by the police not because I was sad for my father's death. Akito found out about the death and I knew he was going to tell you, and I was afraid you would hate me. I always run away from everything, but Hari I'm tired of running. It never works, and I am never happy from it. I am not going to run away from myself and my memories. Even if you could make me forget about how guilty I feel about my father or how disgusting I am for ever making you worry about me I wouldn't want you to. Bad things happen to everyone, but having the bad memories as well as the good ones make you cherish the good ones more and learn from your mistakes."

"Nami I don't know what to do. I don't know what to choose."

"Choose between what?"

"I was ordered to erase your memories by Akito. I could ignore his orders but…"

"But what?"

"I don't think I could go back home."

"You have to choose your family. Can you even imagine what it would do to Shigure he lost both you and me at the same time? You are happy with them too. I don't deserve anything more of the Sohma's you have been overly generous to a murderer like me."

"Nami you aren't a murderer." Hatori paused over his words for a while, "Nami you aren't a murderer!"

"Hari?"

"Akito said that he couldn't house a murderer and that was the reason he wanted to erase your memories. Since you didn't kill anyone I think that is reason enough to ignore his orders," Hari sounded gleeful as if he had just won the lottery.

Nami couldn't help but catch his infectious joy, "you really are that happy you don't have to erase my memories? You are glad I will continue staying after all I put you through?"

Hari nodded and she once again had tears fill her eyes. Something about this accident made her more openly emotional than ever. Or maybe she was just relieved to be with Hatori again and didn't want to hide anything from him anymore.

Once Nami's joy let her think a bit more she realized that there were still a lot of questions to be asked, "so how long have I been in the hospital?"

"You were admitted seven days ago," Hari looked so worn that she actually believed him.

"A week? I thought only a few hours had past. Did you tell Shigure?"

"Yes he was here the first day, but he had to go back to his house and take care of the kids."

Nami couldn't help but let out a cynical chuckle, "I wonder how he knew my brush with death would be with a motorcycle. He must be so worried. How is Aya?"

Hari shook his head, "I haven't gotten the chance to talk to him."

Before Nami could press for my questions a nurse slid in the door and eyes practically popped out of her head, "you're awake?"

"Yeah I heard I was out quite some time too," Nami thought it would be best to be friendly.

"Oh my and responsive too! You really are a miracle case you know that? I am sure the doctor would love to know you are doing well. I will be right back!" The nurse scuttled out of the room.

The doctor came in even more astounded than the nurse. He poked and prodded Nami, and made her go through multiple tests. So many eyes were watching her and flipping through papers and adjusting some of the floating bags hovering around her. Once the doctor finished up his test with her he went on to schmooze with Hari.

That is when the nurse that found her swooped in on Nami, "you know that Dr. Sohma hasn't left your side this entire time."

"He should have been taking care of himself instead of worrying over me. Luckily, he had some really great nurses like you to take care of him huh?" Nami smiled hoping that compliments would settle the girl down.

It had quite the opposite effect, "you really think so? You know you really must mean a lot to Dr. Sohma if he went to such great lengths to stay together huh? What I wouldn't give to be in your shoes…I mean minus all the physical injury he is so hot!"

"Nurse I think Nami needs her rest and you have your rounds to attend to," the doctor called out of the doorway.

"I hope you feel better soon!" The nurse flashed a smile before leaving.

Nami did feel worn out, "I'm glad that is over. I hate doctors."

Hari couldn't help but laugh,"is that a fact?"

"I guess that came out wrong. I don't hate doctors of course I owe my life to the doctors here, and my happiness and memories to another next to me, I just hate being looked at like that."

"What do you mean? I really am fascinated."

"I mean they look at you like a subject with such distant eyes. I know they have to do it so they can diagnose the problem, stay professional, and probably keep their sanity. I just can't help but feel unnerved when they do it though."

"Hm interesting. I wonder if that is a common fear?"

"You know what the funny thing is though?"

"What is that?"

"I never really got that feeling with you. You were professional and everything, but I didn't feel like I was part of some science experiment."

Hari smiled, "you should get your rest. You still have a long road of recovery to go through."

"But I still have so many questions to ask you!"

"I will be here when you wake up I promise."

"Not because you feel guilty or something though right?"

"I choose it out of my own free will."

Nami's nod was interrupted by a yawn. She thought of after being unconscious for a week straight she would feel perfectly rejuvenated, but she felt like she could sleep for another week.

(Hari's POV)

Hari smiled relieved Nami was resting. He was fine with her being unconscious as long as he was positive she would awake again. There was still a lot wrong with her and the road to recovery would be no easy feat. Most of her bones had been fractured or broken on her left side, and she would be bed ridden for a while. Hatori only prayed that Akito would not think of another excuse to make him erase her memories.

Hari sighed and realized he should tell Shigure of the good news he had. He walked outside for the first time in the week and forgot how raw late January was.

"Hello?" Shigure's voice was hesitant.

"Hey it's me Shigure. I thought after a week of leaving you in the dark you deserved an update."

"So there is an update to give then?"

"Nami came to. She's alive Shigure."

"How did she react to you being there?"

"She doesn't hate us. Shigure everything was a big misunderstanding."

Shigure was silent for a few moments before speaking again, "I just. It seems almost too good to be true. Is she well enough for visitors?"

"I am sure she would love to see you, but she is resting now. You're free to come whenever."

"Thanks Hari."

"I really should have called earlier…"

"Not that. Thanks for being there for her when she woke up. I just…"

"Don't worry about it."

I will be there in a few hours. I have to get everything settled here."

"Actually being responsible for once? Now there is a surprise."

They said their farewells and Hari slipped back into the room and looked in the mirror at himself. He really did look like a wreck. He decided to clean himself and make himself look a little more presentable. When he settled down in the worn chair Hari's mind raced. He knew he had been avoiding his responsibilities at the Sohma house for far too long. Even Shigure didn't drop everything and come here. Still, he couldn't just leave her in such a vulnerable state like this. He promised he would be there when she woke up.

Shigure slipped in and broke Hari's scheming about what he would do next, "hey how is everything?"

When Hari looked up he saw Shigure with spare clothes and a bouquet of flowers, "she has been sleeping the entire time."

"I thought you might want a change of clothes," Shigure tossed them to Hari.

Hari slipped away into the bathroom and changed and when he came back out Shigure pulled up a chair right next to Hari's. He seemed to be getting lost in thought. Hatori sat next to him and started to do the same.

"It must have been hell not knowing if she was going to wake up or not," Shigure sighed.

Hari shrugged, "you didn't know either."

"But I was back home. I had things I could be distracted with. I wasn't facing her constantly reminded…" his voice trailed and weakened thinking about the reality of it.

"I chose to stay," Hatori tried to pacify Shigure's empathy.

Shigure actually smiled and looked at Hatori for the first time the entire conversation, "I know. Hari I haven't seen you this dedicated to anyone outside of the family since Kana."

"Your point being?" Hatori's eyebrow cocked.

Shigure's smile grew wider, "oh nothing. Hey I never got to ask how your hot spring trip was before it got cut off."

"It was very relaxing. I am really glad I had the time off before all of this happened."

"Well anything exciting happen? Hot springs can be a very sensual place."

Hatori let out a long sigh, "if you have a question why don't you ask it outright instead of making insinuations?"

"Hari I think you love Nami. I know you are reluctant to acknowledge your feelings especially after your past. I still think ignoring it would be foolish and you deserve to be happy," Shigure's voice lowered and his eyes pierced right through Hatori. "How can you really deny you love someone when waiting by their bedside for a week straight?"

Hatori's hands tightened and his nails dug into his skin, "Shigure I am afraid. If I was to admit anything to myself or to her, and she possibly felt the same way...I can't lose her. I don't know if I can go through that again. I couldn't risk her like that."

(Nami's POV)

"Hari?" Nami called before opening her eyes.

"Awake so soon?" Hari smiled before her and looked a lot better from before.

Nami glanced down and saw Shigure, "Gure you're here!"

"Nami," Shigure reached for her hand and tears streamed down his face, "I am so happy."

"I am sorry I worried you. I just couldn't face the possibility you might not ever want to see me again."

"When did you get that idea I wouldn't?"

Hatori interrupted, "I didn't tell Shigure yet. When I said that everything was a misunderstanding I meant that Akito had it wrong when he insinuated that Nami actually killed her father. She didn't though."

"I don't understand. If you were innocent then why did you run?" Shigure's brow furrowed.

"I am a coward," Nami looked away realizing how many times she had let Shigure down. "Sometimes I wish you would be a normal person and just hate me."

"I wonder what you would be like without being so overdramatic. You know I could never hate you and have no reason to."

"You don't understand Shigure I have hurt you and have let you be hurt."

"I have done the same to you. If we were going by that logic you should hate me too. The fact is though we love each other and always will. Do you know why even if we hurt each other we could never hate one another? It's because we know we only want the best for the other. We would never put each other in pain if it was avoidable, but do what we must given the circumstances. There has never been a light that didn't cast a shadow."

"Thank you Shigure. You have saved me from myself."

"Ah your greatest nemesis," Shigure laughed. "Now you didn't even compliment me on how gentlemanly I was for bringing you flowers."

"That's because they are ugly," she stuck her tongue out.

"Alas my poor little heart is breaking," Shigure gasped.

Nami looked over to her nightstand, "they really are beautiful. It's nice to have some color in such a dreary place."

The shy nurse slipped in the room and got the courage to make her presence known, "um, I am sorry to interrupt, but I need to give her some medications."

"I need medications what for?" Nami hoped to make the shy nurse more comfortable.

She was adjusting some IV's, "we are infusing some morphine into your IV. The extent of which your left side has been crushed would be too painful if we didn't. You need to get some solid rest to heal properly."

"Cool I get to become a hardcore druggie at this rate," Nami laughed.

The nurse didn't dare to say anything more; instead she turned to Hatori. Nami assumed she would try to flirt with him like what most women did. The nurse surprised her by bowing to him, "thank you once again for saving me."

With that she scuttled off and Nami and Shigure's attention both turned to Hari, "she is making a bigger deal of it than it really is."

Nami's eyebrow cocked, "why don't we be the judge of that?"

"Oh well I was curious to see if you knew anything about this Nami so I guess this is a good time to bring it up. Kaori came into your room to try and 'visit' you. He seemed rather upset and was looking for a fight. He was trying to involve innocent workers so I convinced him to leave the building and you alone," Hari sipped on a cup of coffee the nurse had brought in.

Nami's mouth gaped, "you beat up a member of the Yakuza?"

"I don't recall ever saying that."

"You did! There is no way that Kaori would leave by having a heart to heart. Hari are you alright? You weren't hurt were you?"

"I don't look it do I? Did you see him during our time apart?" Hari pressed.

She chewed on her bottom lip, "not by choice."

Nami saw the two Sohma's faces drop. A quick sigh escaped her lips and she knew it would be better to tell them everything. About how she got a motorcycle and planned to be a drifter for the rest of her life. She told them how she was afraid to leave Tokyo and her extra night is what cost her run in with the Yakuza. She quickly added how she outsmarted Kaori in hopes that would placate their worst fantasies.

"So when I was riding away from him is when I saw the kid in the street and crashed," Nami finished up and thought for a moment. "You know I am really glad I was afraid to leave Tokyo. I knew when I left it would be for good and I would never have gotten to see you ever again, and now here I am with you!"

"You would choose to leave behind complete and utter freedom just for us?" Shigure breathed.

"What good is having all the experiences in the world if you have nobody to share them with?" Nami shrugged.

The three talked and talked. They couldn't stop sharing everything with one another because in the hospital they were free. The way they related it seemed like it was months they were apart. By the end Nami's heart was elated. She didn't have many people she loved, but the people she had could give her a happiness she could never have by herself. When the conversation came to a lull after a few hours she couldn't help but think of Akito and fear how he could take everything away. Like this could just be the eye of the storm. She couldn't let that happen and had to try to gain control of her life again.

An older nurse that clearly took everything seriously walked in, "I can tell with your raving you all are having a ball, but I am going to have to ask you boys to leave."

"I am sorry we will let Nami rest, but please let us stay," Shigure begged unable to leave Nami's side quite yet.

"No you must leave," her arms crossed tightly against her chest. "I need to go through some rehabilitation exercises with Nami and cannot afford to have any distractions. You may come back in an hour if you promise to be quiet and let her rest. I will let you know you are also given these special privileges because you are a doctor, but I will not hesitate to make you leave if you disregard my wishes."

Shigure and Hatori slinked out of the room. As stern as the nurse was with them she went through the exercises with Nami quite gently much to Nami's relief. She didn't have much strength and the smallest things took more effort than ever. She felt like a newborn, but was determined not to stay in this state for long. There was a lot of life to live now she was given a second chance and a clear conscience. Nami had cooperated so well the exercises cut off early and she had some time to herself.

She was relieved she did get to see Shigure and Hatori again, but was terrified to get out. She had no idea how Akito would react to Hatori disobeying him. Nami did not want to make Hari carry any more burdens on her account. She glanced up at the clock, she had 15 minutes before the boys were scheduled to come back.

Nami reached over to her phone and dialed the numbers she used to dread when they would come up on caller ID on Hari's house phone. She sucked in a deep breath and heard the phone connect, "Akito this is Nami…"


	18. Chapter 18

Hey guys I am soooo so so sorry I am posting this late. I know I keep using school as an excuse, but I also was on spring break and wanted to get away from the computer and just enjoy the presence of other people. Anyway, I think I will be ending the series soon so be on the lookout of the last few chapters! I will try to update regularly again. Sorry!

18

"Why are you calling me?" Akito breathed into the receiver.

Nami hoped he didn't hear her nervousness, "Hari isn't going to erase my memories like you told him to."

"You really must have hit your head harder than I thought. He must follow my orders. I am the head of the family."

"He would if they were legitimate. You said you wouldn't allow my memories to be there since I was a murderer, but I didn't kill my father. He killed himself."

"I can always issue another order if that is what it takes," Akito's voice sank to dangerous lows.

"Yes you can certainly do that. I have no doubt you would, but if you do that you will only have two possible outcomes and both involve losing your relationship with Hari."

"What do you mean giving such false accusations?" It was strange for Nami to her him on the hotspot.

"Not false I just know them. If they follow your order and Hari does what you ask he will be overcome with grief and distance themselves with you emotionally. Of course there is also a real possibility that Hari could ignore your orders and run away with me and then you would certainly never see him again," Nami couldn't hide her smirk.

"He would never…"

"When was the last time he was at the Sohma estate? Who did he stay with while both of us were in the hospital?"

"I knew you were a bad example. I knew you were tainting my family!"

"I am doing no such thing! If you could only see you are the one putting me in this position. You are being the bad guy. I want them to have their family, and I defiantly don't want him to choose between the two. You could just let me live on with my memories and not have to strain your relationship with your family. I don't want to hurt you Akito."

Nami was holding her breath for his response. Akito thought it would be appropriate to respond with a dial tone though. She couldn't help but be disappointed knowing she didn't get a clear action out of him like she wanted. She would have to wait and think of something else to do.

Sleep over came Nami before the boys could even get back in the room again. She remembered thinking how the simplest things seemed to take so much extra effort than they should have before falling asleep.

When Nami awoke again she looked for a clock or anything to tell her how much time had passed. Did she take a nap or sleep for several hours? It could have been spring outside for all she knew. Shigure and Hari were not in the room which made her heart race for a moment until she heard voices not so far away.

"…she needs her rest. She needs to recover and not be disturbed." Hari's deep voice gave out instructions in his professional voice.

"You know you are always welcome to come back at another time, but we wouldn't want to waste your time or worse strain your health," Shigure added quickly after Hari.

Who were they talking to? Nami had to know, "Hari?"

"Ah she seems to have perfect timing," Nami couldn't forget that voice.

She didn't have enough time to prepare herself for talking with Akito. She wasn't even fully conscious yet. Aya stood right behind him with a somber face.

Nami couldn't help but smile at seeing Ayame again, "Aya you're here too!"

"Now don't pretend you don't remember me," Akito stood before her vision, "you are the one who called me."

"Wait what?" Shigure breathed.

"Nami when did you get the chance to…" Hari was cut off.

Akito shook his head leaning over her bed, "all you know how to do is lie to people isn't it?"

"I didn't lie," Nami kept a firm voice, "I finished my rehab quicker than anticipated so I called Akito and gave him an update on my condition. I felt I should tell him personally. The workout took a lot out of me so I fell asleep before I could tell you. I had no idea he would be coming to visit though."

Akito was so bold to touch her hair, "yes well as I have told you before I think phone calls are such an impersonal way to talk…even a bit cowardly if you ask me."

Hari's fist clenched for a moment, "yes well we are honored you came to check up on Nami to see how she was doing, but she does need her rest and really shouldn't have so many visitors. If you want I will…"

"I don't want to hear anymore from you Hatori," Akito's words infected the air like venom. "You deliberately disobeyed my orders."

"Orders?" Shigure's voice frayed in terror.

Hari shook his head, "you said you wouldn't house a murderer any longer and that was the reason you wanted her memories erased. She didn't kill anyone so I didn't erase her memories."

"She has manipulated you to believe that?" Akito hissed.

Nami couldn't stay silent any longer, "I don't manipulate anyone Akito! You must be confusing me with yourself."

Akito's face was only inches from Nami's and he grabbed her left shoulder, "you insolent little bitch."

Nami couldn't help but shriek from the pain and Hari threw Akito off and onto the other side of the room. Hari's voice was practically a growl, "don't you ever touch her again."

Akito's teeth gritted Nami could tell he was about to give the order so she spoke up again, "stop it please everyone! Don't fight like this!"

Everyone's attention turn toward her in astonishment so she continued, "you are family. I would give anything to have a chance to have family and bond with them. I won't let you do this! I don't want to be the reason for a family feud."

"See she is asking for it," Akito grinned.

Nami shook her head, "don't put words in my mouth Akito. I won't let you. I want more than anything to keep my memories and will go to any length to do so. I want to stay with the Sohma's because you are the only people in the world that cares about me. You are good people despite facing life with such adversity. Akito you are the head of the family, and must have influenced how good every Zodiac member is. You may have strayed in the way, but we all do. Isn't there some compromise we can make so everyone can be happy? Don't you all live with enough pain as is?

"Akito you carry the full curse, and any pain the zodiac feels you must too…I can't imagine how that must be. I don't know how you cope, and of course you have a special connection with your family. You know so well how they were hurt in the past and don't want them to ever go through anymore pain. If there is a chance that happiness can be found though wouldn't that mean you would get to share that feeling as well. Don't you deserve that?"

"Don't act noble as if you are so enlightened. You know nothing about me. You don't even know the amount of pain and worry you have caused them. By running away you sent your proclaimed closest friends to worry. Then when they find you again you are near death and send them to the pits of despair. You deserve to have your memories erased so my family can finally move on from your poison," Akito looked like he was trying to kill her with his leer.

"I don't try to pretend I didn't hurt the people I love the most. I know I did and am ashamed to have done so, but I don't run away from that truth. You abuse your family for no reason. Like you are afraid if you don't rule with fear they will run away in disgust with who you really are. You push away any chance they have at obtaining happiness. Why you do that is inexplicable, but don't deny you haven't been the source of their pain either," Nami kept her gaze with him.

Akito started to thrash in Hari's arms, "don't lecture me! How dare you lecture me!"

"This isn't the place. We are in a hospital. Akito," Aya begged hoping to sooth him.

As suddenly as Akito snapped he calmed himself in Hari's arms. Without another word he started to stride toward the door before Nami called after him, "don't you run away from me!"

He stopped in his tracks, "what did you say?"

"Don't run away. I know running because I have done it all too often in my life, but I am not going to let you run like me. It doesn't solve a thing. I need to know today what your order is. Are you going to let me keep my memories after I am released or not?"

"You are so confident I will say you can keep your memories?"

"Not at all. I just hate more than anything being kept in limbo. I have to know so what is your decision. Will you cause your family more unnecessary strife? Will you be the root of their suffering once again and try to pretend like you are not? Or will you for once trust in your family and revel in shared happiness?"

Akito's eyes narrowed, "you are too brash for your own good. I have never been so insulted in my entire life. I cannot ignore your words. I won't have your memories erased for the time being, but don't think that is a pass for the rest of your life. You still are bound to keep our secret and if I find one person outside of the family that knows…"

Nami couldn't stop the tears from flowing, "thank you. Akito thank you so much."

She couldn't see his reaction since he fled the room so quickly. The boys stood in the room shocked. Aya was the first to come to and ran over to Nami's bed and kissed her forehead, "I promise I will visit with you later but I need to escort Akito."

Nami nodded but words were still a loss to her. She had prepped herself mentally to figure out a way to finally stay away from the Sohma's for good. To run from the person she loved the most. Now she was given a real second chance. Not only did she live against all odds from her accident, have the Sohma's accept her past, but she actually got to move forward with them. This had to be a dream it was too much.

Nami blinked again and Hari caught her vision. He was standing there looking just as shocked as she was. She looked around the room and Shigure disappeared. Nami assumed it was to find Aya and Akito and get on his good side.

Hari grabbed a pillow lying on the side of Nami's bed and threw it on her chest and planted himself on top of it as well for a full embrace. She could feel Hari's hot breath down her neck, and for a moment she was paralyzed with surprise. Nami relished for a moment longer the feeling of being completely protected by Hari and she hugged back. She never wanted the moment to end. She never wanted Hari to let go, but all good things must pass.

When he let go they both noticed Shigure standing by the doorway. Instead of blushing or looking even the slightest bit embarrassed Hari smiled, "did you see Ayame and Akito off?"

Shigure couldn't conceal the smile on his face, "yes but while I was out there bidding them adieu I found a few lost puppies."

Around the corner Yuki, Tohru, and even Kyo slipped around the edge of the doorway with a few bouquets of flowers. They all clamored around Nami wishing her well and asking if she was feeling better.

"Yes I am feeling much better with all this rest. Gure did you put them up to this? " Nami glanced toward him.

"No we came because we heard you were sick and wanted to do something to make you feel better. Any friend of Shigure's is our friend too!" Tohru beamed.

Yuki flashed a Sohma smile, "yes we would have come a bit earlier, but we had to wait till the doctors got rid of the snake infestation."

"Shigure could never order us around anyway!" Kyo's hand gestures almost hit Tohru.

Nami couldn't help but feel blessed. She had so many kind people that actually cared about her. They were willing to accept her back into their lives despite the pain she put them through. It almost felt like she really was a part of the Sohma family.

Nami couldn't help but wonder if Tohru felt the same way about the Sohma's. The boys practically revolved around her and seemed like they really did have their guard down. She smiled and laughed like just being around them gave her the biggest pleasure of her life.

"What are you thinking about?" Shigure whispered in Nami's ear.

"Oh just how much I can relate to Tohru," Nami smiled up at him.

"How so?" Shigure's brow cocked.

"Well just how being around you Sohma men you can feel completely at home and perfectly happy," Nami looked right into Shigure's eyes.

Shigure smiled and squeezed Nami's hand carefully before jumping in the midst of the younger generation, "alright I need to get you kids home. I can't let you fall behind in your studies because of Nami's charms."

"So if we are kids why do you gotta hit on girls our age you pervert?" Kyo seethed.

"Oh Nami make them be nice to me. All I do is provide for them," Shigure pulled on her sheets.

Nami shrugged, "I can't deny that you are in fact a pervert. It is your own fault."

Shigure managed to mobilize his kids and Tohru was holding Kyo's hand beaming up at him. Yuki fell behind and stayed by Nami's side, "I really hope you feel better, and well I wanted to thank you."

"Why do I deserve thanks?" Nami tried to seem open.

"I had to thank you for being friends with my brother and actually getting to know him and expose a good side of him. Also for being brave enough to face Akito. I know that is no easy feat. Do you think when you recover my brother and us could go out to lunch together? I think if you are there I will be able to tolerate him more."

"Of course! Oh Aya is going to be so happy!"

"That is what I am afraid of," Yuki sounded defeated as if he could feel Aya's ego crushing him. "If you really think that he is a good person I believe I can see that same side of him as well. Having you there will help to serve as a reminder of that fact."

"Bad Nami, bad!" Shigure called from the doorway, "let that poor boy go!"

Yuki rolled his eyes, "I better go before he gets himself kicked out."

Nami laughed, "it wouldn't be the first time."

With Yuki gone Nami and Hatori were alone once again, and she couldn't shake the feeling Shigure did that on purpose. Hari was in his usual spot in the chair right next to her bed. Nami wasn't sure how to act or say after the hug. It was just a hug wasn't it?

"Do you realize how much you put at stake a few minute ago?" Hatori breathed as if he were still frightened by the situation.

"Well," Nami mulled over her words, "I didn't think it was that big of a deal letting Shigure in here."

"I am serious Nami. You could have push Akito to order me to erase your memories. I really am confounded on why he didn't."

"Maybe he respects someone that can actually tell him the truth instead of conforming to his whims."

"I doubt that."

"Yeah me too, but that is all I can think of. Anyway everything turned out fine so no need to worry about it anymore."

"You sure have had a change of heart haven't you? Weren't you the one that ran off because you couldn't face the past you weren't responsible for?"

Nami let out a sad chuckle, "yeah I was. Don't get me wrong I am far from over what happened, and I am far from convinced what happened wasn't my fault. I am trying to act differently than what I feel though because if you can accept me for all that I am then I think there must be some truth in what you are saying I am a good person."

"You are a good person."

"Then you have to believe me when I say you are too. You are in the same boat as me right?"

"You really never will change will you Nami?"

"What do you mean?"

"You really will always want to brush off your problems and fix those around you huh? I am just glad you are being straightforward with your emotion again though."

"I hated lying for any reason."

"I think your selflessness is one of the reasons I like you so much," Hari smiled looking right at her.

Nami couldn't help but flush and glance away, "oh well um thanks."

Hari placed his hand on her face and guided it to meet him in the eyes, "I think I am the one who should be direct now."

She sucked in a deep breath to try and placate her butterflies, "about what?"

Hari took his free hand and held Nami's hand squeezing it for a moment before he spoke, "Nami, for the past week I thought I lost you. I have never felt such a sense of loss in my life."

"What about with Kana?" she breathed.

"I knew she would live a happy and fulfilling life, and she lived up to my expectations. With you losing you so suddenly, then finding you in this state, and to top it all off thinking after such adversity having to lose you to my own hand facing all of this made me realize my worst fear and what I have to tell you," Hari actually lost his composure and anxiety traced along his features. "I have fallen in love with you Nami, and I am not ashamed to say it. My only trepidation now is if you feel the same way."

Nami was shocked into silence and with all the pain killers coursing through her body she couldn't gauge if this was reality or not. Maybe she had died in the motorcycle accident and managed to get to haven. This couldn't be real could it?


	19. Chapter 19

Hello all my precious and dedicated readers. If any of you are still around and reading this I am exceedingly surprised and grateful. I am really sorry for my sudden absence leaving you at a pretty critical juncture in the story. I won't lie school was catching up with me as I was getting to finals, but a pretty serious writer's block hit me. I didn't know what to write and I was afraid of disappointing you all so instead I did nothing which wasn't fair to any of you.

I didn't think my hiatus would be so long, but after finals (which were pretty trying this time around) I though summer would be the perfect time to play catch up. Between work and family medical scares though writing was far from my mind. Luckily, things have slowed down and the medical scare turned out to be pretty positive.

So how does this amount up to you my darling readers? Well I promise that by this Wednesday June 29th I will update the next chapter. Not only do I promise that, but I also promise to stick with my bi-weekly updates. I will not fall behind again and leave you all hanging.

That being said I am still a little unclear of what direction I should take this fanfiction. I have two possible scenarios that could play out, but since I abused my readers so much I decided to let you weigh in on this. I want to know what you guys think this story should go. How did you guys think it would resolve when I abandoned you all those months (I am sorry for that!)? PM or review this chapter with your thoughts. I would love to hear some feedback from you all! Do it after the 29th too. I have the next chapter almost complete by now, but hey it could be altered depending on what I hear.

Alright that was long winded, but I felt some explanation was in order. Thank you for your patience with me. You guys rock!


	20. Chapter 20

Hello my dear readers! I am so sorry for the long haiatus. If you didn't get the memo before on what happened to me look to the last chapter and I explained everything. I wanted to thank everyone who reviewed to give me the encouragement to go on. I would have been disappointed if I thought I would be writing for no one. Your encouragement helped so much in fact that I even got some ideas on how to move on with the story! I am gonna be writing up a storm for a while. Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter! The next update will be in two weeks on Wed.

19

Hari laughed a bit, "did I scare you with all of that talk? I am sorry I was so direct. You don't have to answer."

Nami noticed Hari couldn't conceal his disappointment which shocked her, "you're ridiculous of course I love you too."

Hari's head bolted up, "I thought…you don't have to say it out of pity or pressure."

"How can a man as smart as you be this thick? I have fallen in love with you; I thought it was painfully obvious by how awkward I would act around you. If you want some solid evidence for the science part of you I can give it to you," she laughed.

"So we are officially dating then?"

"I would say so."

"Good," Hari exuded that irresistible Sohma aura.

He leaned in maneuvering around the wires and planted a kiss on Nami's lips. She was stiff for a moment from the shock at how unusually forward he was being, but then let herself meld into him. Nami would never have pulled apart from Hari if she had a choice, but he was the one to pull away with a smirk on his face.

"I am sorry," Hari couldn't stop smiling.

"For what?" Nami was still a bit breathless.

Hari glanced up at her heart monitor revealing her quickened heartbeat that was just starting to slow down, "I didn't want to cause a stir among the nurses."

Nami flushed and glanced away when Hari's hand enveloped hers as he continued, "get some rest you still have a long way to recover before you are fully healed."

"Hari you know I could die happy right now," she was trying with all her might to hold back tears.

"That would certainly defeat the purpose of you being here," Hari actually joked.

Nami held onto Hari's hand and drifted into unconsciousness. Nami was awoken by shrill shouts of joy. When her vision came into focus she saw Aya twirling around the room unable to contain himself, "oh Hari I cannot even believe how perfect this is!"

"Hey Aya," Nami yawned still groggy.

"I knew you would wake her up," Hari sighed and leaned in to her, "you can go back to sleep now if you want."

Nami shook her head, "I haven't gotten to see you in a while how is everything?"

Aya strut toward her bed, "everything is absolutely how it should be. Hari told me about how you two are finally a couple! I am so proud my little Nami finally finding someone and not growing up to be an old maid!"

"You know," her eyes narrowed, "I can think of some very creative places to put these needles."

Ayame went on unphased, "Hari could not stop talking about how excited he was you two were finally dating. I could hardly get a word in edgewise. Oh but I approve of this match in case you were worried."

"What are you my older brother?"

"Something along those lines. I have to keep my precious little flower safe you know!" Aya pinched Nami's cheek.

Nami decided the worst punishment for Aya was the cold shoulder, "so you must be really bored just sitting there by your lonesome all this time. I am sorry to keep you waiting."

"Don't worry about me. Put your efforts on getting yourself better," Hari's hand rubbed hers.

Nami looked down at their hands for a moment, "have I been holding your hand the entire time I have been asleep?"

"I think you wanted to make sure I would keep my word," Hari had a soft smile on his face.

She flushed, "sorry about that you must want that back now."

He kept holding when her grasp loosened, "I don't mind. I want to be by your side. Don't you remember I was the one who confessed my feelings toward you?"

"You two fill the role of lovers perfectly already!" Aya bounded as Nami was forced to remember his presence. "You really are so consumed with each other it is precious! I can just hear the wedding bells now. Oh Nami can I please design your wedding dress?"

Nami laughed instead of anger she was expecting, "it's good to see you haven't changed Aya. I have missed you and even your antics. I am sorry to have left and worried you. I can tell with the way you act you are still worried, but I can't tell about what. Please tell me."

Aya sat down and let out a laugh, "I have missed your directness. I have just been feeling guilty I haven't gotten to see you until now, but taking care of Akito has been more time consuming than I planned. He is getting better obviously and it seems like he is slowly changing though I can't say for sure."

"I am sorry Ayame," Hari looked abashed. "I have abandoned my responsibilities and have been very self indulgent and you have had to pay for that."

"Don't apologize. You have been doing a very important job here that I don't think I could have done staying with Nami. I know I couldn't handle waiting here not knowing if she was going to be okay. Anyway, I always rely on you to take care of Akito. It's good I am doing this now and spreading the wealth for both of you," Aya smiled and was very sincere.

Nami's face contorted a bit and Hari tensed immediately, "are you feeling pain? Do you think I should get the doctor?"

"I'm fine it's just….there is something off about you," Nami trailed. "I know! You haven't been smoking have you?"

Hari chuckled under his breath, "no hospitals generally don't encourage smoking inside."

"Well you have been by my bed side too long you need to get out and smoke or take a walk to a restaurant for some real food or something if you even know how to move anymore."

"But I…"

"Get out of here crazy. I am sure Aya will stay me for a little while right?"

"Of course I will I have so many tips to give you about Hari that he could simply not hear," Aya faux whispered in her ear.

Hari smiled and slipped out of the room though he did glance back once before leaving. She did owe Aya some quality time alone, and with Hari around she was liable to be distracted. Now they were alone she could talk about subject matter she was too afraid to with Hari around.

"What is so secretive that you can't trust Hari with the information?" Aya saw right through her and she hoped it wasn't that obvious to Hari too.

Nami chewed on her lip a bit, "well I did want some time alone with you. I am not trying to keep secrets from Hari, but I am afraid bringing certain topics around him could upset him, and I think I have done enough of that. I mean how are you really doing Aya? How are things at the estate?"

"I am fine really Nami you worry too much."

"I trust you would have the confidence if something was on your mind you would tell me about it, and would not deliberately deceive me."

Ayame sighed, "Akito has been going to a psychologist as prescribe by the doctors. It helps some considering how he acted today, but I think it can only go so far since he can't talk about the curse."

"You worry he will try again?" Aya's silence prompted Nami to continue, "I think what will help him the most is for him to be around family and let him talk about his worries with you. I think if he knows you are around and won't reject him and is not so dependent on one person and coupled with the therapy he should be okay."

"I love your optimism."

"You think I am unrealistic?"

"No maybe you're right. If Akito gets you alone though and…"

"Don't worry I won't be played the same way again. I really have no secrets now and I know you guys want and need me as much as I need you. I think Akito recognizes our dependence as well, and despite how he hurts you I think deep down he does want to help."

"You are very willing to turn the other cheek after what he did to you."

Nami shrugged, "I am trying not to harbor hatred toward him. There is a lot I don't know about the Sohma's, and I certainly don't know what it is like to have a curse or having to deal with it the entire time. I don't know how I would act if I had to bear it. Don't get me wrong if he tries to hurt anyone I will defiantly stand up to him, but I…I don't know I really do feel bad for him. I don't think I will ever trust him though."

"Maybe you are starting to understand the curse better than you think."

"What makes you say that?"

"Knowing there are bad things going on, but you can't blame the person who's actions cause the harm. I think you are starting to get that complexity."

"I don't know, but I do have some good news to tell you! Kyo, Tohru, Yuki came down to visit me today unexpectedly. It was really sweet of them and when they were leaving Yuki specifically lagged behind to tell me that he wanted you, me and, him to have lunch together!"

Ayame was completely silent for a moment, but the next thing Nami knew he was right by the phone with his most grandiose tone, "Yuki my darling little brother I knew you would come to me! Are you in search to delve into my infinite wisdom?"

Nami shut off the phone before any more damage could be done. Aya pranced around the room in total bliss. Not long after Hari walked in and sat down next to Nami not even taking note of Aya's behavior.

Hari instinctively grabbed her hand as Aya blathered on in excitement, "I am sure he is fawning over how I can exude such elegance. Oh this simply will not do!"

"What?" Nami laughed.

"I need to make new clothes to awe him with and he can proudly sport. He will tell everyone of how is brother made these exceptional pieces of art he wears," with that Aya scampered off, but before he did he calmed down, "may I borrow a pillow?"

"This?" Nami held one out confused.

He snatched it from her hands put it on her chest and fell into a long hug. Nami didn't feel shocked like she should have by the abrupt action, but simply hugged Aya back too. Once they finally parted Aya gave a soft smile to her.

"Shigure gave me that tip," Aya winked and scuttled out of the room.

Nami sucked in a deep breath and smiled, "that's better."

"What me smelling of cigarettes?" Hari looked right into her eyes.

"Just everything. I never thought everything could be so perfect. It is a little scary though."

"Why are you scared?"

"When things are going so well and reach such great heights the only thing you can do is fall."

"How do you know you have reached the threshold of happiness?"

"I guess I don't. I just can't imagine being more blessed."

"How about not being in tremendous amounts of physical pain?"

"Well I guess that is a start…" Nami laughed.

The days seemed to slip on by from falling into a pattern of sleep and physical therapy. All of the drudgery of the hospital was counter balanced by having Hari by her side. Shigure even managed to talk to the publisher and continue Nami's job as a novelist, and so by the end of her stay she was even getting work done. Shortly after Hari started dating Nami made him go back to Sohma house and return to his work, and only come during visiting hours. She owed his family at least that much. Even though it was annoying being cooped up in the hospital for weeks, Nami was sort of grateful. It gave time for Nami to be away from Akito and let both their hatred toward one another subside.

After several weeks in the hospital Nami was finally released. She realized this time when she went back to Hari's house though she was no longer really a guest, but almost a part of the family. It was a nice front that Akito had ordered Nami to live on the grounds, but it made bonding with Hari significantly easier. They would be practically inspirable, and hopefully she wouldn't get too annoying.

Hari picked up Nami in his normal doctor attire, "Shigure and Aya apologize that they couldn't make it out here. They said today they were loaded with work."

"I guess we will have to go to the house ourselves then," Nami let an eager smile slip.

Hari said nothing and opened the door to the car for Nami but she caught a smirk out of the corner of her eye. They drove home and were catching each other up on how they were doing, but it was small talk. There was an electricity of excitement with and undertone of nervousness. How would their relationship change living together? Would it make it better? Would Nami be horribly unproductive? What happened if Akito knew they were dating?

The car jolted to a stop along with the thrum of questions. Hari held Nami's hand and they entered into the house together that way. When they got in Hari quickly excused himself scuttling toward his office. For a moment, a pang of fear shook Nami that things now might be awkward until she noticed a small blue flower petal in the entrance to the kitchen doorway. As she got in there was a thicker and more frequent line of them leading her to her doorway of her room. She paused realizing the petals were from forget-me-nots and sucked in a deep breath. When she opened her door to her room she couldn't help but smile when she saw a small, low table filled set with tea cups and in the center a bouquet of forget-me-nots.

"Welcome home," Hari breathed down her neck.

She couldn't help but jump a bit, "you don't have to pamper me like this you know."

"What if I want to?" Hari helped her sit at the table.

"I guess I would say you are being ridiculous then," Nami played with the flower petals.

"I guess you will just have to live with it. He scuttled out of the room and got the warm teapot off of the stove.

"I don't want to pull you away from your job I know you are really busy and everything."

"It's not hard for me to stay away from my job, but it will be hard is leaving your side."

"You know that sounds like something out of a cheap romance novel," Nami tried to hide her blush.

Hari laughed, "yes it really was bad wasn't it, but the sentiment is true. I am not as eloquent with words as you. I just thought doing this would be a nice welcome home present and we would be able to talk in complete privacy."

"Is there something we need to talk about in private?"

"I guess not, but I think it's nice having a conversation without a nurse jabbing you with a needle."

"Huh interesting theory. Hey I actually do have a question for you though. When did you decide that you loved me?"

"That is a hard question. I don't really know exactly when I consciously accepted that fact. It was a sort of tug of war with my emotions. I didn't want to put myself or you at risk by caring for you like I had with Hana. I also didn't know if I could move past her or not for a while. The more I was around you though the more it was harder to suppress what I felt. What pushed me over the edge to accepting my feelings was almost losing you. If that hadn't happened I don't know if I would have ever come to terms with it."

"I guess there is some good that came out of my rash decisions then."

"How about you?"

"Me? Well I sorted everything out a bit earlier than you. It was at the hot springs that I realized it, and that is why it was so hard for me to write that note and leave. I was only able to do it because of my complete cowardice, and the fact I thought my feelings could never be reciprocated."

Hari didn't say anything but walked around the table and sat down right next to Nami. His hand raised slowly and his fingers traced over the contours of her face until it got wrapped up in her hair. Nami's heart raced. She still couldn't fully believe this was real, and she really was so lucky. He leaned in slowly as if he were carefully inspecting every feature until his eyes closed and their lips melded. She savored his hot breath melding with hers. Their tongues danced and instinctively she threw her arms around him. When he pulled his lips away from her mouth they were not satisfied yet. They made little pricks of delight down her neck and into its hollow.

"Do you feel like the feeling is reciprocated yet?" Hari mumbled into her neck.

Nami kissed his forehead, "I think you have proved your point. I didn't know you were so affectionate. I didn't think you were the type."

Hari looked right to her, "you shouldn't make assumptions."

Before anything could go further in their time alone the phone interrupted and Hari gave a short chuckle, "why is it always at the most inopportune times?"

He gave Nami a quick peck before going to the kitchen for the phone as Nami listened in, "hello? Oh yes…No I don't mind…no it's no problem at all. I will be right over."

Nami looked up and without prompting Hari he explained himself, "that was Momiji's father. He asked me if I could pick him up and watch him for the rest of the afternoon and I accepted. I am going to be leaving in a bit to get him from school. Do you want to come, or would you rather stay?"

"I would like to come, but I will probably just slow you both down. Anyway, I need to get some work done while there are no distractions," she winked.

"Yes I better get some self restraint and get some work done too," before he could slip out of the room Nami grabbed his hand.

"Umm I am sorry. I know it is really not the best time or anything, but I wanted to give you something. I promise it won't take very long."

"You didn't have to do anything you know."

"I know I wanted to," Nami rummaged through a bag revealing a necklace with a leather strap and silver and copper knot pendent. "I know it doesn't look all that great, but the metal part is supposed to represent how people's fates intertwine. I just wanted to give you something and if you wanted to wear it you could, but you don't have to."

Hari put on the necklace and tucked it beneath his shirt and kissed her forehead, "it's perfect. I love it."

He left the room with one more glance than necessary. She heard him leave for Momiji in no time the boys were back. Momiji bounded inside making his presence known. Nami heard Hari's cool voice reprimand him for being so loud and how Nami needed to work. Momiji whined letting Hari know how acutely he wanted to see Nami again.

"I guess I better go out to save Hari some trouble," Nami said to herself.

Momiji was bounding around the kitchen when Nami came in. Hari gave her an apology with his eyes. Nami smiled at him and then at Momiji, "well I am glad to see you again."

A large warm smile spread across Momiji's face, "hey Nami I missed you are you feeling better?"

"I'm sorry was he being too loud," Hari's glowered down at Momiji.

"Not at all really," Nami tried to pacify Hari before he could scold Momiji too much. "You know Momiji you can be quite elusive if you want to be. I was wondering if it would be okay to spend the evening with you?"

Momiji pranced around her, "oh yes, yes, yes! That sounds like so much fun! Hari you will join us too won't you? Please?"

"Now Momiji you have school work to attend too. I want you to get that done before you do anything else," Hari put on his professional voice.

Momiji looked cute even when he pouted, "but I want to spend time with Nami at least. I want to see if she is feeling better!"

"No, no you do have work to get done Momiji then you must do it. If you work diligently though I will cook you up a nice dinner and we can all eat it together," Nami tousled his hair.

Hari's eyebrow cocked, "you think you are cooking the day you get out of the hospital?"

"Of course. I want to eat something silly! Plus I haven't been doing anything for three weeks I can at least do that," Nami's hands landed on her hips.

"I know, I know, how about we all cook it together like a family?" Momiji smiled.

Hari's features softened, "alright. But you do have to get all of your work done."

"Okay!" He ran off to Hari's office grabbing his bag along the way.

Once Nami was sure Momiji was out of the room Nami whispered to Hari, "are you okay? What's wrong Hari?"

"It's nothing," he saw she wouldn't buy that, "I will tell you after Momiji leaves tonight."

"Alright," Nami felt a ball of ice form in her stomach as Hari walked away with his stoic expression.

She only hoped she didn't do anything to offend him or Momiji. She would have to make it up to them by making a really nice dinner. Nami went off to work until it was dinner. She did have a lot to catch up on. Luckily she went into one of her writing jags and it seemed like no time had passed when Momiji came knocking on her door, "hey Nami am I interrupting you?"

She got up and opened the door, "nope I was just about to take a break. Lets get dinner started!"

Hari was already in the kitchen when they arrived, "what do you wanna make?"

"Momiji do you like yudofu?" Nami remembered it was Hari's favorite dish.

"Yeah!" Momiji didn't seem capable of holding any other emotion than happiness.

The three happily made dinner. Momiji took up most of the conversation asking how Nami was doing and then proceeded on a more stream of consciousness. He talked about kids in his school and how cute his little sister was and things like that. They happily ate through dinner and it did surprise Nami how much she felt a part of the Sohma family. It was nice. Momiji seemed to really enjoy being around Hari which was a good thing. He always could use an optimist around.

All too soon Hari took Momiji back home while Nami cleaned the dishes. He was pleasant throughout dinner, but she couldn't help but wonder what had gotten him so upset earlier. She was going to hold him to his word.

Hari got back within a few minutes and kissed Nami's forehead and then proceeded to help put away the clean dishes. Nami got a bit flustered with the kiss. He could be so affectionate, which wasn't a bad thing, but seemed so out of character for him.

Nami remembered to ask him about earlier. His charm would not get him out of this, "so Hari what upset you earlier today that you didn't want to talk about in front of Momiji?"

Hari sighed as he leaned against the kitchen counter, "it's really nothing you should have to worry yourself about."

Her brows stitched together, "Hari if we are going to really be dating you have to be honest with me and tell me what's on your mind. How can we have a relationship if you stay like a closed book?"

"You do deserve to know. Do you remember how surprised I was when you found out about the transformation for the first time?"

"Yeah…what about it?"

"Do you also remember when I told you how I had to erase a mother's memory before because they rejected their child? That is what I had to do with Momiji's mother."

"What? Are you kidding me? Momiji is such a sweet boy. For a mother to reject her own child that way…"

"It's part of the curse. I know there was nothing I could do to change his mother's mind, but still I do feel guilty at times. Like there could have been something to say so she didn't reject her own son."

"Obviously Momiji loves you though and doesn't hold it against you. I could tell he loved being with you. If he isn't upset with you then you should take it easy on yourself. It was her decision not yours," Nami rubbed Hari's hand.

"Momiji is such a kind boy and loves all of his family. He is just a caring soul like that. Momiji comes here because it's when his father can't watch him when his mother and little sister are around. Nami his sister doesn't even know Momiji is her brother," Hari's eyes took on the vacant façade with the crinkles of guilt leaking out in the edges.

Nami pulled her hand away from Hari and balled up her fists, "I hate this curse. I hate how it targets some of the best people. Why? What did you ever do?"

Hari's eyes locked with Nami's and he took her chin in his hand as he bent over for a passionate kiss. He let his hands stray from her chin to her hair. Nami's hands mimicked Hari's in his own hair. She wanted to drink his pain and guilt. She would gladly take it if it would make him feel better.

When they pulled away Nami let her forehead rest on his. She wanted to do nothing more than hold him. She wanted to physically support him as well as emotionally. He deserved at least that, but this damn curse.

Nami's voice was laden with anger and sorrow, "I hate this curse." She paused for a moment before she looked at Hari with hope glinting in her eyes, "most curses have a way to break them right?"

"I don't know if this one can be. Nobodies tried or have any clues on how," Hari's eyes were closed as his breath caressed Nami's face.

"I am going to. I promise you Hatori Sohma I will figure out how to break your curse no matter what. I promise you won't have to erase any more memories and free you of your guilt," Nami sealed her promise by kissing Hari's left hand as her eyes never left his.

Hari let a sad smile touch his face, "you're always the optimist aren't you Nami?"


	21. Chapter 21

Hello my lovely readers! I meant to publish this a bit earlier today, but when I was rereading it for the final edit I found myself writing more. So for making you wait at least you get a bit more to read! I hope you enjoy it.

20

Once Nami finished her promise she tried to calm herself down. The world could be so unfair to the most worthy of people. A few tears slid down Nami's cheek. Hari didn't show his emotions or let them out. He might have worked this out a long time ago, but it was all still so fresh for Nami.

Hari kissed both her eyelids, "you're upset."

"Well I know you won't be crying. Somebody has to do it for you then," Nami gave a weak smile that contrasted against the tears sliding down.

"I don't want you to have to cry for me. I don't want to be making you upset," Hari's face darkened.

"You're not making me cry the curse is," Nami rubbed her eyes furiously. They were puffy when she looked up at him, "I love you."

"I love you too," his face lit up as he went in for a kiss. Once they parted he was stroking her hair, "do you want to stay in my room with me tonight. I don't want to send you off to bed like this."

Her face lit up bright red, "I well. I mean what exactly…"

He saved face for her, "we will just be falling asleep together is all. I don't think…"

"Me either," she jumped.

They weren't quite ready to move onto that in their relationship yet. Nami wasn't even sure how it could happen if someone was cursed. Well they would have to worry about that part when they were ready for it. It was a bit funny to see Hari choke on his words for once. She was relieved he could be nervous too.

Hatori took her by the hand and led her to her room. Nami's brow furrowed so he answered her unspoken question, "you need to get changed into night clothes right?"

"Oh yeah of course," Nami blushed. She didn't know what to pick. Nobody instructed her on what to wear while casually sleeping in your boyfriend's bed but still trying to look cute. She decided to wear her nicer green silk tank top and pants.

When she went to disrobe and bend to get off her pants she let out a small yelp. Hari who had been waiting outside of her door rushed into the room, "I don't mean to intrude, but I think you need help. Are you still in pain from your injuries?"

"I guess. How pathetic," Nami huffed. Weeks in the hospital and she still hadn't fully recovered.

An impish smile slipped on Hari's face as he helped change Nami. This time when Hari was seeing her partly nude he didn't have to act so professional. She suppressed a blush and slight moan as Hari let his fingers slide down her legs as he pulled off her jeans. His touch was so light but his fingers left an electrifying trail in their wake. He slowly slid on her silk bottoms and was so unnecessarily close she could feel his breath on her legs. Hari kept right at work and took her top off kissing her all the way up her center in the shirts wake.

He even kissed her neck up to her ear and breathed, "do you wear your bra to bed?"

"No," Nami whispered breathless.

Hari slowly slid his hands down her bare chest till half his hand cupped the fabric of her bra. He slowly slid behind Nami letting at least one hand rest on her breast until he had to use both hands to unhitch her bra. He slid his hands up her back kissing her spine as he took off her bra straps for her. He carefully spun her around and she couldn't help but blush with her breasts fully exposed.

Nami's face was crimson but Hari flashed one of those Sohma smiles, "you're beautiful."

"Well if I am gonna stand here like this we should even out the score a bit," she steadied her voice.

He made no attempt to put on her top just yet and she slid off Hari's jacket as she kissed the hollow of his neck. Once his overcoat was off she pulled back to unbutton his shirt. She kissed where each missing button was until she was below his naval. She breathed out as she slowly stood up letting her breath graze his body. She heard Hari let out a calm sigh with a smile on his face. She slipped off his shirt and he opened his eyes.

For a moment they stood and looked at one another. They were allowed to indulge now. They had restricted themselves for so long. Nami was pleased to see Hari with a six pack and broad muscular shoulders and arms. They couldn't restrain themselves anymore and let their tongues explore the familiar territory of each other's mouths. At first their hands were intertwined in each others hair, but Hari's hand slipped down and grabbed and rubbed Nami's bare breast. Nami moaned in approval in Hari's mouth and let her hands slip down and grab a handful of Hari's hard ass. Hari grunted as he pressed himself closer. It was frustrating to have to keep their distance so he wouldn't transform, but still an all around very good experience.

After some unimportant amount of time Nami pulled away and sucked in some precious air, "we shouldn't let it get any further tonight."

Hari let his hands drop, "you're right. I'm sorry for being so forward."

"It's okay," Nami handed him her silk top, "I think it's sexy when you are like that. I really enjoyed myself. Oh and you're not getting your shirt back on tonight. You look too good like that."

"You're too kind," he laughed as he slipped her silk top on and held her hand. "I don't want to go to fast though. I don't want you to think all I am about is the physical."

Hari ironically led her to his bedroom when he said the last statement. It was pretty barren of anything but the necessities. A few decorations were scattered about but it seemed more like a place to decompress after a day of stress. It was nice.

Nami sat on the plush double bed, "what happens if I accidently bump into you at night?"

Hari scuttled out of the room and came right back with pillows in hand, "I think this small barrier will suffice."

Nami and Hari put the small feathery wall in the middle. Nami was quite annoyed at the curse. She wanted to enjoy herself like normal couples could and not have to deal with all this stupid crap. She had to think of a way to break the curse and fast. Once the stronghold was put between them Nami watched as Hari slipped off his pants and was only left with his boxers. He slid into bed and both turned to the center to face one another. The pillows blocked most of their body, but their faces and feet could touch.

Hari threw his arm over the white barrier and pulled Nami into him. Their faces were only inches apart. Somehow the proximity enhanced Hari's stunning features. Their breath mingled and the world shrunk down to the two of them.

They let themselves slip into those perfect silences where so much more could be said than words could ever do justice. It had been too long since it happened. At the hospital Nami always wanted to catch up on how everyone was doing and making sure Hari was eating properly while he was away. Even when they wouldn't talk there was too many machines connected up beeping and buzzing to let any sort of serenity be achieved.

Nami was reluctant to let this moment pass. Hari's onyx eyes held such depth but she forced herself to move on, "we should really go to sleep."

He sighed in agreement and let his chin rest atop her head. Nami would have given so much just to be able to remove those stupid pillows between them. She nuzzled into the crook of his shoulder and breathed in his scent till it was not worth it to fight her eyelids anymore.

When morning came she kept her eyes closed and let the warm morning sun beat on her skin. She knew Hari probably had already awoken and had to get to work. She opened her eyes and found her eyes meeting his unfathomable ones.

"Good morning," his voice was deep and husky.

Nami kissed him, "I didn't think you would be here when I woke up."

"Why did you think that?" He sounded only mildly upset.

"Well," Nami flushed, "I thought you would have work or something more important to do."

"More important than being with you? That's ridiculous." Hari initiated a kiss.

"I could think of a lot of more important things right now, but I want to be charmed instead," Nami giggled against Hari's whiskers.

The couple got up from bed and went for the kitchen to grab some breakfast and get some coffee. They did have to face the reality that they still had to make a living. As they were sipping on some coffee the phone rang and Hari answered it, "Sohma residence…hello Ayame."

Nami smiled into her coffee cup. Even across the kitchen she could almost hear Aya's jubilant voice. His happiness was infectious and Nami felt like she got lighter just knowing Aya was calling. It was so good to have friends around.

"Yes she is home….I did take good care of her. We're just eating breakfast now and are about to start our work day," Hari kept his eyes on Nami while he spoke to Aya, "well I don't know about that you would have to ask her. I don't make plans for her."

Hari handed her the phone, "hello Aya."

"Nami! I am so glad to hear your darling voice. I know how happy you are to hear mine as well. It's like a chorus of angels greeting you this morning. Try not to tear up now," Aya babbled through the receiver.

Nami chuckled, "did you have a point to calling me Aya or did you just want to keep me from working?"

"I feel really terrible about not being able to see you yesterday when you got out of the hospital."

"You don't have to feel bad. I was actually proud you were doing work."

"Yes well I was so upset I didn't see you I didn't get a thing done yesterday!"

"You just aim to disappoint me now don't you?"

"Anyway, I remember you telling me about how Yuki wanted to have lunch with you and me sometime and I was wondering if you wanted to do that today since it is Sunday and he has off. I wanted to get to you before you got too into your work schedule."

Nami chewed on her lip torn between responsibility and fun, "Aya I do need to get started on work sometime. I have a ton of hospital bills to pay off and a future to plan for."

"Oh Nami if you are talking about you and Hari's wedding plans you don't have to worry about paying for a dress. You know I will make you look like the perfect bride for free!"

"That wasn't what I was talking about. Do you want me to come or not?"

"It's alright if you can't come," by the drama filling his voice she knew this was going to be bad. "I understand if you are too busy to accompany me to let me rekindle my relationship with my little brother. You know he wouldn't come without you there."

Nami made sure she let out a long sigh into the receiver, "what time do you wanna pick me up?"

"That's the spirit! I will be at Hari's to get you at 12:30! Try not to be throwing yourself on Hari at that time. I will need to pull you two away," Aya's jubilant voice returned after getting what he wanted.

When she hung up the phone she looked over toward Hari and sighed. It was his turn to laugh in his coffee cup, "he is really happy this is all happening and Yuki actually made some intent to go and see him. It lets him know that there still is some hope."

"I know. I am really glad for that. We've all made our mistakes in the past, but Aya is such a good person. I just want Yuki to see that in him," Nami let her finger drag around the rim of her cup.

"You never cease to amaze me," Hari took a few steps closer. "There is something about you that can just fix things. I am so lucky and am so sorry."

Nami chuckled to hide her embarrassment, "what are you sorry for?"

"For ever thinking it would be better if you didn't associate with the Sohma's," Hari glanced down to the side.

She shook her head, "you didn't know me. I'm not perfect. I just want the people around me to be happy is all."

He cupped her chin and kissed her, "I love you. I have to go to work. Akito has an appointment with me soon."

"Doctor's and writers don't know what weekends are. How unfortunate."

"Don't work yourself too hard today. I think it is a good thing you are leaving for lunch. Maybe you should take the rest of the day off after that."

Nami decided aversion was the best tactic, "have a nice day. I have to be a recluse now to get enough work done before lunch."

They parted ways and Nami fell into her writing jags. She had to fall into one quickly or else she would be consumed with fear of what Akito could be doing to Hari. If she let herself think about it the temptation to get up and go over there would be too much. Akito deserved some time alone with Hari, but what really kept her down was the fact she was too scared to see him. She had to hold onto her memories and couldn't take a beating in the state she was in.

"Nami!" Ayame's jubilant voice pulled herself out of her fantasy world. He let himself in her room, "there you are! Are you ready to go?"

"Sure. Where are we meeting Yuki?" She stretched.

"The cutest little noodle shop! It is only a few blocks from where I work. I know he will just love it. Oh I was thinking of inviting him with Tohru to my shop. They're just darling together. She is a lot more innocent than you are, but still between them reminds me of when we were young," he said without taking a breath.

Nami placed a hand on his shoulder, "you're nervous right?"

"Why would you ever…"

She cut him off, "I know you Aya. You don't have to be. You are just eating a lunch with your little brother. It's the chance you always wanted to reconnect and he initiated it. Just enjoy today."

"I just…how am I ever supposed to make up for all those years?" He deflated covering his face.

Nami took his hand that covered his face and held it in her own and looked in his eyes, "you can't change the past. All you can do now though is be there for him. In the grand scheme of your lives you have a lot more years to be there than not. You have a lot to understand about each other and I know you will be able to meet halfway and fully accept one another."

"I hope so," he sighed.

Nami smiled, "let's get going."

When they got to the outside of the restaurant Yuki was already there, "I started to think you wouldn't show."

He laughed and didn't think much of his own words, but Nami saw the hints of pain at Aya's smile. She wanted to give Aya some time, "it's good to see you again Yuki."

"You as well miss Nami especially now that you're out of a hospital bed." Yuki flashed a charming smile that seemed to come naturally to the Sohma's.

"Let's not stand out here all day now! We have so much to catch up on!" Aya pranced inside.

Once they were seated in their booth (Nami next to Aya since he said something ridiculous like a lady should never have to sit alone) and placed their orders it was time for the real conversation to begin.

Yuki started the conversation again much to Nami's surprise, "so Aya how has work been?"

"Oh just wonderful! I have the most helpful assistant and now that spring is just around the corner there is a rush of business. You know how spring is just perfect for romance," Ayame actually took a breath and seemed like he was going to stop talking. "Hey how is Tohru doing with all of you? It's so nice to have a delicate flower in your midst isn't it?"

"Why would you bring her up after romance?" Yuki eye's narrowed. Ayame just smiled and Yuki sighed, "she doing well. She seems to be really comfortable and even happy living with us."

"I am glad to hear that!" Aya seemed like he was going to say more before the waitress interrupted to bring out their food.

Yuki took the interruption to grab hold of the conversation before his brother could, "how is Akito doing? I haven't been to the main house recently."

"He is doing better now that he has help," Aya smiled gently and his voice lost the dramatic tone it almost always held.

"How are you doing? I know you found him," Yuki let his noodles grow cold.

Ayame couldn't answer for a moment he was so touched to know his brother was concerned for him, "I'm fine. I know he is under good care and he ha s a lot of support. I know the curse weighs on him, but when he's surrounded by the family he seems to do better knowing he's not alone."

"I really should visit him," Nami was shocked to see Yuki look nervous.

Ayame touched his brother's hand, "you don't have to go alone. Tell me when you're coming up and I will go with you."

Yuki's shock melted into a smile, "alright."

The brothers were silent for a moment and they started to realize their surroundings and that Nami was with them. Aya patted Nami's shoulder, "my, my this must be exceedingly boring for you! Look how we have excluded you from our conversation!"

Nami 's hair brushed her face as she shook her head, "no don't worry about it! I am glad to see you both getting along."

The three fell into an easy and polite conversation. Ayame found his grandiose tone again which Nami could tell was starting to grate on Yuki. She was worried when Yuki went to speak it would be to start an argument with his older brother.

"Nami tell me have you been enjoying staying on the Sohma estate," she was really relieved to hear Yuki be polite and not berate his brother.

She didn't want to draw too much attention to Yuki's actions so she continued the conversation, "oh yes I am. All the Sohma's are so kind. Tohru is very lucky to have found your family."

"I am glad you think so." Yuki paused and seemed to have measured his words. "May I ask you a question?"

"Of course anything."

"After everything you've been through and all you have had to suffer do you think the curse is too much to bear? Is it wrong to subject other people to our curse and make them suffer for our own happiness?"

"Well, I know the curse lays heavy on all the zodiac shoulders. I don't think I even understand the full extent of it or what it means. From my perspective I don't really see of feel much of the repercussions of the curse or talk to anyone about it. I think that is the hardest part living with you all really. You all are so selfless and so concerned about not burdening anyone else you let yourselves suffer. That is so hard to watch. Other than that though you all are normal boys I just have to make sure not to accidently bump into."

Yuki sat silent staring at Nami trying to decipher if her words could possibly be true. Nami decided adding a bit more to help him, "I knew the Sohma's for seven years before I found out about the curse at all. Ayame and Shigure for the longest time were just normal friends. Knowing another facet about them and the rest of the family doesn't change anything really. It just lets me understand them better and enables me to help out more.

"I know I only met Tohru a couple of times, but I guarantee you she really does cherish living with you. Despite what you have drilled into your heads you Sohma's are very kind and good at heart. People love being around good people. I think it isn't because of your curse you are noticed, but because you have learned to be such good people that you are so popular."

Yuki smiled and Ayame popped back to life, "look at her little brother. Can't you tell she is a writer with how eloquent she is. She's so cute it's no wonder Hatori just had to date her."

Nami flushed a bit when she brought up Hari in front of Yuki, "Aya…"

"Oh it's fine I am sure Yuki already knew. He does live with that big mouthed Shigure," Ayame waved his hand.

Nami scoffed, "you're one to talk."

The conversation took another lighthearted and normal turn. Everyone seemed to be comfortable and when Nami checked the time she was shocked to see it was already 2:30. They left the restaurant and as the brothers were saying their goodbyes beneath the awning since the skies looked threatening Nami realized Yuki had no mode of transportation.

"Yuki, you don't plan to walk home do you?" Nami gasped.

Yuki shrugged, "it's really not a big deal Ms. Nami. I walked to get here."

"Look at that sky though. It's about to downpour. Why don't you come back to Hari's place and have him drive you home?"

"I couldn't impose like that."

"I know it would be no problem. It would be worse if you were to get sick and he had to make a house call. Anyway it is a nice excuse for me to visit Shigure a bit when I take you back," Nami smiled and took his hand walking back.

"Alright then, I guess it's okay," he seemed a bit flustered.

Ayame let out a hearty laugh, "there's the Nami I know! Taking charge and insisting on her way."

She stuck out her tongue, "keep up that talk and you won't be allowed inside."

"I do look forward to seeing how you and Hari are as a couple. You seem to be very cute together," Yuki said mostly to himself.

Nami couldn't help but blush. She hoped the brother's good will toward one another would last and that Hari would be home from work soon. As soon as she opened the door she called, "I'm home. I brought two visitors!"

After looking up she immediately lost her voice. There were two dark brooding men coming to greet them, and one of whom was the last person she wanted to see. Nami's heart dropped remembering how nervous Yuki looked when he talked about Akito and seeing him and she dragged him here.

"Oh Akito," she found her voice, "I didn't know you would be joining us today."

"Yes I wanted to see how you were doing. You even brought Yuki back home with you how nice." Akito turned toward Yuki twirling his hair a bit, "I missed you dearly at the New Year's celebration you know."

Hari soothed with his professional voice, "why don't we all sit down for a cup of tea."

They scuttled to the living room as Nami and Hari set out tea to everyone until they settled themselves in as well. It was also a short amount of time Nami needed to adjust to the thought of him being in her home. He was invading her sanctuary. Ayame and Akito had been chatting and Nami overheard Yuki agreeing to see Akito after this. She really did feel guilty.

Once Nami sat down Akito turned his attention on her, "I am glad to see you are doing well. Hatori told me how your injuries were healing. After everything I see now that you are indeed loyal to the Sohma's."

"Thank you, and yes I will always keep your secret. Your family has done so much for me," Nami attempted to smile though she wasn't quite sure if she did.

"I also came here to bring you some news. After seeing your loyalty I don't think you need to stay at the main house any longer. You're granted your freedom once again," Akito smiled. His voice held a slightly threatening undertone with the next sentence, "I think you should move out by the end of the week."


	22. Chapter 22

Hey guys! I am really sorry I am so late. To be quite honest I had the whole chapter written a bit back and ready to go. I just was so busy getting ready for Otakon this weekend I totally didn't even think about updating till now. I hope it's worth the wait. The next chapter will still come up on time ( I am not going to penalize you guys for my mistakes) on August, 10 2011.

21

Nami froze in place shock written all over her face. She couldn't absorb all the repercussions this would cause of how she would hardly get to see Hari or where she would find the money. She couldn't think if Akito did this to try to move forward and be nice or to stop her and Hari's bond. All she could think was she would be waking up next to Hari for real this time and this was all some sort of sick dream.

But in her dreams she never felt so acutely ill before. When everyone was staring at her for a few moments longer waiting for her reactions she managed to move her lips, "oh thank you."

"To make your accommodations you are free to leave the Sohma estate without a member of the zodiac. You're granted your freedom once again," his smile almost made bile rise to her throat and jump started the adrenaline in her veins.

Aya glanced over at Hatori who clearly didn't see this coming either and wanted to give both his friends time to process the information, "how generous of you. I am so glad you feel you can trust Nami! I know everyone has enjoyed their tea together, but I don't want you pushing yourself too hard. Hari had a long appointment with you and you need your rest. Please let me escort you back. I know you were looking forward to seeing Yuki now, but I don't want him walking back to Shigure's with a storm on the horizon. Since we're already at Hari's I think it makes sense if he were to drive him back now before it gets too late. Yuki does have school and finals to start studying for. I am sure after the year ends he and I will be more than happy to visit with you on vacation a bit won't you Yuki?"

Yuki just caught the end of the conversation where he was mentioned and relief threatened to paralyze him at not having to spend time with Akito tonight. He collected his composure though, "yes of course. I would love to be able to spend some time with you then Akito."

Ayame kept blathering on to Akito to make sure he didn't get any more of a word in edgewise. Nami was nervous what the repercussions of a frustrated Akito alone with Ayame would mean, but she didn't dare open her mouth lest she ruin all of Aya's efforts. Aya rushed through the goodbyes and soon it was only Hatori, Yuki, and Nami left in the room.

Nami sucked a deep breath in, "Yuki I am sorry. I had no clue Akito was going to be here otherwise I…"

Yuki waved his hand, "please don't apologize. There is no need."

"How about we get you back to Shigure's? I don't want you staying too late on a school night," Hari said too calmly.

"May I come with you too?" Nami said more weakly than she would have liked. "I don't think I want to be in here alone right now."

Hari nodded and the three piled into the car. Nami sat in the front with Hari and noticed how tightly he was gripping the steering wheel. She wanted to console him, but felt it would be too improper in front of Yuki. She knew Hatori was trying very hard to save face in front of his younger cousin. The three arrived at Shigure's quicker than normal due to Hari's uncharacteristic speeding.

"Thank you for the ride Hatori. Would you both like to come in? I am sure Shigure would like to see you now that you are out of the hospital," Nami was impressed at how quickly Yuki could regain his composure.

Nami glanced at Hari to let him decide if he was in the mood. His professional voice broke through, "yes thank you very much."

Yuki lead the way and called for Shigure and quickly fled up to his room. He half heartedly explained his absence for school work. Shigure's eyebrows knitted together just a bit, but then resumed to his normal self in the presence of his closest friends.

"Nami what a pleasant surprise!" Shigure tousled her hair as if she really were five. "How was your first day back? Hari did take good care of you didn't he?"

Just being around Shigure and far away from the estate made her feel safe. She could almost pretend the previous conversation had never happened. The only thing reminding her was Hari's taut lips. Still she thought she should ease her way into heavy conversation, "do you have a few minutes? We wanted to talk to you?"

"Anything for you my love," Shigure gave a devious glance toward Hari and elbowed him. "I guess those are supposed to be your words now? Are you very jealous Hari?"

He just sighed, "Shigure you pose absolutely no threat to me at all. You spent seven years alone with the girl and never managed once to pique her interest romantically. Can we sit down now?"

"Hari you can be so cold sometimes," Shigure slinked off looking like a kicked puppy.

The three sat in Shigure's office since Kyo and Tohru were in the living room chatting happily and watching T.V together. Once they all got settled in Shigure gushed, "so how was your first day alone together? Nami please tell me he wasn't too much of a prude and knew how to add some romance for you? Hari if you need to you can always study up by reading some of my novels."

Hari let a real chuckle slip, "Ha. The day I read your books is when hell will freeze over."

Shigure caught Nami's blush and didn't bother to retort to Hari, "Nami what happened? Ohh did you two…?"

"Stop right there Shigure. If you insinuate one more thing I will make sure the publishing world will know every embarrassing thing you've done since you were five," Hari got on the defensive. He was too ready for a fight.

Shigure scooted closer to Nami, "with how defensive Hari is you two must have! Oh my you take things fast. You can hardly keep your hands off of each other."

"Shigure," Nami said between laughs, "you're worse than a teenage girl! I assure you _that _did not happen. Man, you really are a pervert aren't you?"

Shigure smiled and settled back into his seat, "well I am glad I at least got you two smiling. Now what has you both so tense? Is everything okay?"

Nami's stomach iced over. She studied Shigure and noticed there were slight bags under his eyes. All she had been doing recently is worrying him starting with leaving, to the accident, and now she came here to vent to him. It didn't feel right she should make him worry anymore. Hadn't she let Akito beat him as she coward in the dark?

Hatori spoke breaking Nami's self deprecation, "I went to give Akito a checkup today and he insisted he come back to my place and see Nami personally. I didn't object because if he was at my house I would have to be there though I did wonder what he would have to bring up with her."

"Akito saw Nami?" Shigure's face paled as he turned to her, "are you alright? He didn't hurt you any further did he? You just got out of the hospital and…"

"I'm fine really Gure. Hari was there and wouldn't have let me get hurt." Nami said to both sooth Shigure and let Hari know she trusted him. "He really did have to just speak with me."

Shigure waited for her to go on, "and what did he say?"

Nami bit her lip but kept a cheerful tone, "well…he thought it would be a good idea for me to move out of the Sohma estate now. He said he was giving me back my freedom."

"You don't have to sugarcoat it for him," Hari's voice was dangerously venomous. "Akito only did that to keep us apart. He knows you are still healing….and to make you move in only a week. Where will you be able to find a place in such a short time? He's just angry that I spent all that time in the hospital with you."

Once Shigure was positive Hari was done with his uncharacteristic rant he spoke, "maybe he really thought he was doing something kind by releasing her from his captivity."

Hari's hands clenched tight, "no. The way he said it was almost vindictive. He was expecting her to fail so he could…"

"Hari," Nami crooned as she ran her fingers in his hair, "it's okay. You won't have to do anything like that. We're gonna be fine."

"When am I going to see you? Between our workloads…he knows it too." He never took his eyes off of his hands.

Shigure sat right before Hatori, "you never get this upset. Didn't you used to call yourself frozen snow?"

"It was inevitable spring would come once again," a small smile crawled on Hari's face.

"You really are adorable when you're love sick you know that?" Shigure pinched Hari's cheek.

He glanced up, "this isn't the time for jokes you know."

"For being so smart you sure are dense Hari. If Akito wants Nami to move out then she is more than welcome to stay with me," Shigure talked slowly as if he were talking to a child.

It was her turn to get upset, "no Gure! I can't do that."

"Why not?" The expression on his face showed he was thinking over his words to make sure he didn't miss something.

"I've imposed on the Sohma hospitality for far too long. I can't risk Akito getting upset at you too for sheltering me. I am a grown woman and need to stand on my own." She paused looking over the boy's worry ridden faces. "Listen, I have caused you and Hari enough stress to last for years. I wanna prove to you I can make it on my own once again. Hari we will be fine. We will just have to act like a normal dating couple. Akito can't keep you working constantly. If I can't find a place within the time allotted I'll stay with Gure until I find something."

"I'm sorry," Hari's cool voice returned. "I am sorry for showing that ugly side to you."

Shigure leaned toward Nami and faux whispered, "Hari is really a pretty boy concerned with his appearance. Oh you should have seen him in high school."

"Ohh, any juicy stories you can tell me?" Nami tittered.

Hari let a laugh escape, "you two are horrible together."

Nami smiled relieved to hear his laugh, "see what you would let happen if Shigure and I were to live together?"

"The possibility makes me shudder," Hari rolled his eyes.

Nami shrugged, "who knows he might even find a way to sweep me off my feet. He could charm me and steal me away from you."

"Now I know that's impossible," Hari reached for her hand.

She accepted it, "yeah you're right! He has no chance."

"You two are perfect for one another. You're so heartless," Shigure looked off melodramatically in the distance.

Nami lightly punched Shigure in the arm, "maybe that's why I don't feel bad about being friends with a pervert."

Hari glanced up at the clock, "thank you for everything Shigure, but we really must be off."

"Aww Hari don't leave yet. You're not going to take Nami with you are you?" Shigure pouted at Hari's feet as he stood.

Hari reached down to help Nami up, "of course I am. She still lives with me for the time being."

His pout was quickly replaced with an impish smile, "you two just can't keep your hands off one another."

Nami started striding for the door accentuating her sigh, "goodbye Shigure."

"Nami," Shigure reached for her shoulder as she looked back, "when you get your new place we should initiate it like we did in the old days. Hell we will even show Hari how to have a good time. He should see your true partying side."

"That sounds great," Nami put her hand atop of Shigure's and leaned her head into their hands. "Thank you so much for always being here for me. I don't know what I would do without you Gure."

"Isn't that the sort of mushy stuff that you should be saying to Hari?" He started to wave her away before pausing, "you're welcome. Thank you for always coming back."

Nami let the stare continue before breaking physical contact with Shigure. Once again her annoyance with not being able to hug him always presented itself in the most inopportune times. Hatori and Nami settled back into their car and drove away as Shigure stood waving goodbye from his porch.

It was getting late as Nami sighed, "I have to figure something out to make for dinner."

"Let's eat out tonight. I never have taken you on a proper date yet," Hari smiled.

Nami was about to object before she realized Hari still was gripping the steering wheel tighter than normal. He wasn't ready to go back to the estate and honestly she wasn't up for cooking tonight. Too much else weighed on her mind. She did manage to insist that they just go to a normal restaurant. She wasn't dressed for anything fancy and hated the idea of Hari paying something so extravagant.

They ended up at a nice, but not too nice, rotating sushi place. When they settled themselves in and picked out their delectable variety she noticed the undertone of Hari's pained expression, "what's on your mind."

"Nothing," he quickly brushed off and paused when he saw the look on Nami's face. He knew he had to continue with something, "you know I was wondering something at Shigure's."

Nami didn't like his change of tone. She knew he was hiding something, but didn't want to press him too hard in public. "What is that? Were you wondering how much he works Tohru to keep his house clean?"

"No, not that," he chuckled. "You two really get along together very well."

"You just noticed that now? Hari I've been friends with the man for seven years. I think there is a reason for that. What are you trying to get at?"

"Well, I know you both were joking, but maybe it wouldn't be so crazy to date him. It just baffles me why you chose me over him."

"Seriously, Hari?" Nami almost thought this was a joke. It was so painfully obvious she loved Hari. She of course loved Shigure too, but not at all in the same way. It was almost incomprehensible that Hatori could have insecurities and then let them show. He was always so cool.

He simply nodded, "as soon as we arrived there you were so relaxed and happy. He could make you laugh and you two just acted so natural together. What have I ever done for you but worry you? I am the person you should be afraid of erasing your memories. Shigure could never betray you like that."

Hari was so sincere it made Nami's heart ache. She couldn't help but kiss him, and when they parted she refused to move more than a few inches apart and held onto his hands, "Hari don't get me wrong I do love Shigure, but it is not at all in the same way I love you. He is like an older brother to me. I really do consider him my family. I have never once considered dating him though it would be too weird and certainly not work out."

"How are you so sure? What if you are confusing your emotions? He was never able to get near you when you knew him the majority of the time because of the curse. I was the first man in the Sohma's that did because you lived with me."

"Alright, well I am going to be blunt with you Hari. I have never once wanted to jump Shigure's bones like I do with you almost constantly," the slight blush that rose to Hari's cheeks was unbearably adorable. "Secondly, Shigure is a great friend. I can always talk to him and feel comfortable and happy. Whenever I am around you I get butterflies and nervous because I never want you to see me as an idiot. I want to be perfect in your eyes to make sure you will never leave my side for even a moment. I find almost every part of you attractive and love the way your hair frames your face and how you are able to keep your cool demeanor in the most crucial times. I know you would protect me and find that unbelievably masculine and sexy. I love our quite talks over dinner and how our conversations meander and we cover everything; I know we could talk forever and never get bored. Your quite defiance and stubbornness to always stand up for what you believe in is a rare quality almost nobody else in the world has."

Hari gave a small smile and a chaste kiss with his hand cupping her chin, "I don't know what I did to deserve you. Your admiration is undeserved though. I don't defy anyone. I feel more like a pawn than anything."

"I swear Hari when you reflect upon yourself it has to be in the ocean."

"Excuse me?"

"Instead of looking in a piece of pristine glass to reflect upon yourself you look in the ocean. You see a fractured imperfect image of yourself."

"You really are obvious about your occupation sometimes you know."

Nami shrugged, "well I just want to let you know you are most definitely not a pawn. You go against all the negativity and always search to do the right thing to help others without regard how you will be affected. You can't tell me you didn't stand up to Akito waiting by my bedside in the hospital."

"Look how gallant I was today in telling him off about letting you stay with me," Hari tried to pull away from Nami's grasp, but she held on.

"You did the right thing," she crooned. "If you told him off who knows what the repercussions would be. He would get suspicious on why I wanted to stay with you. He might have found out about our relationship and gotten infuriated and order you to erase my memories."

"Ever the optimist aren't you?"

"You need some of it in your life Hari. Trust me."

"Maybe you're right. It's strange I have never felt like this before. I have never been resentful of Akito. Before with Kana when her memories were erased and he told me to do it I knew I had to. I knew he had anger issues and I was the one to expose her to Akito's wrath, and if she couldn't handle something like that then it would be better for her to forget.

"But this…I mean he isn't ordering me to do anything. So I shouldn't feel anything, and yet I feel more upset than ever. I have always followed him and been his pawn. Shouldn't all my years of service to him earn me someone I can be truly happy around?"He looked down at the carpet with his brows stitched together.

Nami kissed his forehead and he looked up at her a bit more composed, "it's alright. Your anger is justified, but don't worry so much. Like you said he isn't making you erase my memories. I am just going to be living a bit farther away. I will be right there and hell maybe after a little while you can sneak off of the estate and stay at my place. You could use some deviousness in your life."

"You're right," Hari stood and helped Nami up, "but let's go to the house and make full use of it while we can."

She did feel like a hormonal teenager, "don't have to ask me twice!"

When Nami woke up the next morning Hari's and her chests were touching and their legs intertwined. The Great Wall of Pillows was reduced to one single pillow between their stomachs. She knew she should get up and start her work, but just laying wrapped in Hari's arms as he held her tightly to his bare chest was just too good to move from. She felt so safe and warm, and like nothing in the world could harm or upset her now. Well, except for the fact that after this week she didn't know when this scenario would happen again. Her mornings of bliss were limited and it was almost enough to make her cry.

Soon Hari's eyes opened as Nami was tracing along the muscles of his chest, "what a perfect way to wake up."

Nami looked up at him and she let her chaste morning kiss slip into something more passionate than she was expecting, "I'm really going to miss this."

He held her and spoke into her hair, "I'm sorry you fell in love with me. You deserve a normal relationship with a better man."

Nami wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders, "I'm so happy to have gotten to know you, and even happier to have fallen in love with you. Never apologize for being the best thing in my life."

"Nami," she felt him swallow hard.

She pulled back to look at him to see his eyes closed and jaw clenched, "Hari what's wrong?"

"Nothing," he kissed her forehead and rolled out of bed.

She jumped out to catch his hand, "Hari why won't you tell me?"

He turned around with unfathomable eyes, "Kana said the same thing to me. It wasn't long after before I had to erase her memories."

Nami's grasp loosened and he slipped away excusing himself for work. Nami stood there dumbstruck and decided she should go do the same thing. The phone rang before she could slip into her room surprised to hear Mi on the phone and wanting her to come into the office. Nami had to agree after all she put her through with being out for so long.

Nami put on her professional outfit (a pantsuit with a loose bun) and leaned on Hari's doorway to his office at home. She lightly knocked and he looked up, "you look nice."

His voice was back to normal, but Nami still felt bad shaking him up so much. "I'm going out for a little. Mi called me and wanted me to come into the office."

"Do you want me to join you?" He stood up to get a jacket.

She touched his hand, "you don't need too. Remember Akito said I could leave myself now? I was thinking it might be a good thing for me to go and walk to my office and check out if there any apartments open. It would take a while and you have work to do. I will be back to make us dinner."

She gave him a goodbye kiss and started her walk. As much as she would hate being apart from Hari it was exhilarating to leave the estate by herself when she wanted. Walking down the streets with nothing else but her thoughts was refreshing. She got into the office and saw Mi with some flowers to greet her.

"Welcome back!" Mi hugged and shoved the bouquet in Nami's hands.

"You really didn't have to do this you know."

"Consider this my welcome back and get well soon flowers put into one. I feel horrible not visiting you in the hospital."

"No worries. I pretty much had a doctor by my side constantly so I don't know how much attention I could have given you."

"I am glad to hear they were taking care of my responsible novelist. If only Shigure could be more like you."

"Did you just call me in to gossip and think of ways to make Shigure responsible? You should know by now that is impossible."

"No actually I wanted to see how you were doing, and discuss some options for you."

"Like what kind of options?"

"Well, your sales are going up, and you got a ton of letters when you were in the hospital from your readers. When we saw how dedicated your readers were we thought it might be worthwhile to start a book tour as soon as possible."

"A tour? Do you think it would be worth it?"

"Well when we announced you would have to delay your next book a few weeks back due to medical issues your readers sent so much support and it really showcased your fan base. It might be worth it to give some signings and it would definitely help your sales. Of course the whole tour would be paid for and you would get a nice bonus for doing it. You would get to go all around the countryside and out of the city for weeks and with pretty luxurious accommodations. Oh please, Nami you must do this."

"How long would I be gone for?" Nami chewed on her lip.

"About three weeks. I know you did just get out of the hospital, but it is better to strike while the iron is hot. You could be the next big thing! It would really help your career."

Nami hated the thought of being away from Hatori for three weeks. That was as long as she was in the hospital, but she knew she didn't have any choice. It was lucky she got off so long and she did need the extra revenue, "sounds great when can I leave?"


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 22

Nami felt deflated. For every step forward she seemed to be taking two steps back. It was her fault she was in this position though with her rash decisions and cowardice that made her leave Hari in the first place. She just hated he had to be punished too. First Akito makes her move out in a week and now her publisher wants her leaving in a week and a half to two weeks and tour for three. Now she would be missing the when the cherry blossoms came out too. She was really hoping for a romantic date there as cheesy and crowded as it would be.

The cold March rain fell on her as if it were an extension of her mood. She wasn't even trudging home where she could snuggle up, but was looking place to place for a new apartment. Since it was such an odd time of the year most places didn't need new tenants. Just when she thought her day couldn't get any worse a car drove by and splashed an oily cold puddle all over her suit. Perfect.

She looked at her watch and it was only three thirty. Still, she couldn't make any sort of first impression like this. She decided not to fight against this day that fate determined would be horrid and go home, or what she could call home for a few days longer.

Nami slipped in the doorway silently despite how loud the sloshing in her shoes sounded in her head. She snuck in the kitchen to see Hari sitting over a late lunch, "hey what happened to you?"

He came over and wrapped his arms around her sopping body. He was so warm and dry despite the slight distance between them. Nami started to push away, "I'm sorry. I don't want to get you wet."

"Don't worry about it," he looked down at her with those ever concerned eyes. "What happened to you to put you in such a state? Are you okay?"

Nami didn't want to have to bring everything up now. She didn't want to upset Hari by telling him the news about her work. All she wanted was to get into dry clothes, get a cup of tea, and snuggle in bed with him. She would have to tell him sooner or later, "how about I explain everything once I get into some dry clothes?"

"Alright. I will brew some tea out here for us," Hari kissed her forehead.

Nami held onto his hand, "I'm too cold to go to my room by myself. Come with me."

She led him to her room and started changing before Hari before he started to take over. When she let her hands rub against his smooth skin she realized how slimy and oily she was from the puddle, "Hari stop."

He looked up concerned to see Nami slumped on the bed with just her bra and pants on, "what's wrong?"

Hari sat next to her and she scooted away, "I'm disgusting. I need a shower and I can't even spend lunch with you now because of it. All I want is to spend what time I have left with you, and not drive you away from my repulsiveness."

"You could never disgust me," he took her chin into his hands and looked right into Nami's eyes. "What do you mean by the time we have left? Like you said we can always see one another like a normal couple. Don't worry. As for my lunch it can wait."

"You already waited long enough to eat it. I don't want you to wait more while I am in my shower," Nami couldn't bring herself to tell Hari about her trip yet.

"Well I was thinking of taking a shower myself today," a sheepish smile crept across his lips.

Nami's heart thrummed against her chest. A hot shower would be nice; she was sort of looking forward to gathering her thoughts alone in there about how she would tell him. Still, it wouldn't be all that relaxing. She really did need something positive in this day, and a wet and steamy Hari was too tempting especially since she didn't know when she might get this chance again.

She decided to answer by unbuttoning his shirt and dragging him toward the bathroom. He followed her lead and soon they were in the shower with hot water falling upon them. Nami did feel a bit self conscious being completely nude in front of Hari, but they way he looked at her as the most important thing in the world instead of a piece of meat made her comfortable. Well that and she was busy admiring how the water beaded down his perfectly sculpted chest.

After letting their eyes have their sensational fill the couple decided it was time to excite their other senses. Hari pressed Nami against the cool side of the tile which was a pleasant contrast to his steaming body. When their lips mingled Nami found her hands searching over every inch of his body. She wanted to memorize and soak in every muscle that moved so perfectly against their body when they would scarcely touch. She wanted more than anything to close the tantalizing gap that was always between them.

"This," Nami breathed against his neck, "is what I wanted to do at the hot springs."

Hari laughed in the hollow of her neck, "me too."

Nami lightly bit on his ear when Hari kissed her thighs, "I thought you weren't sure about us back then."

Hari paused and looked up at her, "can I make a confession?"

"Well," Nami bent down and explored his mouth confident she knew every inch of it by now, but still found it endlessly fascinating, "what?"

"I peeked when you got in the water," he let a devious smile play across his lips.

Nami just laughed and they started to clean each other. Hari of course had a way with his hands. They were so strong and probing without being intrusive. Nami made sure she was thorough too and was pleased when she heard a deep throated moan come from deep inside his chest.

They stayed in there until the water turned cold. They got out and Nami slipped into her robe as Hari found his boxers. Nami kissed Hari as if kissing him was as essential as breathing, "you know the water bill is going to be through the roof."

"That's the last thing on my mind," Hari ran his fingers through her soaked hair.

"Mmmhhh. You really know how to make the worst days turn into the best." Nami rested her head on Hari's bare chest.

He took a deep breath of her hair, "I hope it's not perfect quite yet. We haven't even gotten to go all the way yet."

"Still a man aren't you?" Nami threw his pants to him but held onto his shirt. She looked at it for a moment and put it on with only underwear.

Hari smiled, "I like that look on you."

Nami let her eyes stroll casually down his abs, "that one is good for you too. Let's have some lunch."

The two held hands and walked to the kitchen as they were. Nami loved doing silly simple things like walk around each other half nude. She knew she would miss small moments like this when she would be living alone again. She knew doing things like this together would make it harder for her to pull away, but it would be memories like these that would be the most cherished of when they were young and first in love. Any repercussions would be worth keeping them intact because when life would seem to be filled with drudgery she could look back to these precious moments when she felt completely alive and knew exactly what bliss meant.

Hari reheated his cold soup as Nami warmed up some tea and soup for herself. When she was over the stove Hari stood behind her and both his hands atop his as he kissed her neck. He worked his way up until his lips found hers. Nami pulled only inches away and stared into Hari's eyes for a bit. Their internal passion was broken by a screeching tea kettle.

Nami let out a small sigh and continues to get the rest of her lunch ready. Hari moved away so she wouldn't be restricted by his bulk. Nami brought her tea and soup to the table serving some tea to Hari and giving him a fresh bowl of soup.

She was about to sit when Hari interrupted, "you're not about to sit on that cold floor half nude are you? That is a sure way to get sick with your damp hair."

"I am going to be sitting on a pillow I will be fine Doctor," Nami didn't quite understand why he was kicking up such a fuss over this.

"No I simply cannot allow it. I would be ignoring my duties," Hari pulled Nami down to his lap.

She couldn't help but admire how hard Hari tried to cheer her up without trying to push the information out of her. Nami curled in his lap and leaned in surprised to find her pillow for the floor against Hari's stomach. She leaned her head against Hari's bare chest and took a deep breath in. While sucking in his intoxicating scent and closed her eyes and just listened to the steady rhythm of his heart beat. That precious sound could be her lullaby.

"Hari," she was lulled into a trance by how peaceful everything was. She knew it was now or never, "Mi called me to the office this afternoon to tell me she wanted me to go on a book tour for three weeks."

Nami opened her eyes to look up at his which were mostly curious, "did you accept?"

"Yes. She wants me to leave around two weeks from now," she wrapped her arms around his chest. Her hands were preoccupied feeling the musculature of his strong back.

"Is that what upset you when you came home?" Nami loved the way his voice rumbled in his chest.

"Mostly yeah. I mean getting splashed by an oily puddle wasn't that great either," Nami tried to joke, but let her voice reveal her concerns. "I hate the thought of being away from you that long. I mean right now being away that long is as long as the time we have been dating."

Hari stroked her hair, "are you afraid you will fall out of love with me because nothing on my part will change."

"No of course not! But hey try not to be too tempted by mistresses throwing themselves at you okay?" Nami let her smile reach her eyes.

Hari rolled his, "yes you know how many women I have to reject constantly."

"Hey I totally believe it. Shigure and Aya told me what you were like in high school."

"That was a long time ago."

"I got to overhear a lot of tittering nurses at the hospital. Hell a few even came up to me and told me how lucky I was."

Hari simply sighed and shook his head, "so what do you plan to do about moving out. It seems silly to pay for an apartment for a month when you won't be there."

"I was thinking I would still look around tomorrow and try to set something up for next month. So I could be settled in right when I got back. I guess I would take Shigure up on his offer to stay with him while I wait. I just don't know what to do about all my stuff."

"It's too much extra effort to move out for a few days and then move again. Why don't we ask Akito for an extension? I am sure he would allow it given the circumstances."

"Yeah I bet he will be excited I won't get to see any of his family for weeks on end," Nami let some acidity drip into her voice.

Hari kissed her forehead, "hey think of it this way, if it works out we bought a few more days that we can spend like this."

"I didn't think my optimism would ever rub off on you," Nami laughed.

"It's hard not to be in a good mood when you're half nude and right next to me."

They kissed for the millionth time and went back to eating and resuming their day. Once they were finished with their meal Nami relented and gave Hari back his shirt incase he needed to go see any patients today. She slipped into a tank top and sweats and forced herself to go back to her room and write. She noticed she would have writers block every hour and the only way to cure it would be to spend a few minutes with Hari in his office. At first she would make excuses by bringing in tea or snacks, but after a while she just slip in without giving any type of excuse besides wanting to be near him.

When she slipped in one of these times Hari looked up with her, "hello again."

"I am sorry to keep bugging you. I just want to get my fill before I go. If you need to get your work done please tell me to go," she stayed by the doorway.

Hari walked up to her and pecked her on the lips, "how could I ever send you away? I think though instead of doing the back and forth we should just work in here together."

"Ahh you're brilliant!" Nami flew to her room and came back.

They both started working on the floor sitting next to one another. Surprisingly they were able to get some work done between their flirtations. The rest of the week they worked like this. When they weren't working together they made sure to preoccupy themselves with one another's bodies. They were endlessly fascinating to each other.

When they went to visit Akito he was surprisingly generous and in a good mood without lashing out at anyone. He let Nami stay until she had to leave for her trip. Nami feared he would see this as an opportunity to try and convince Hari to break off all ties with her, but she trusted he would stay strong against him.

Nami even managed to find a good deal on a nice apartment only a few blocks away from the estate. Hari insisted he go with her and the landlady Nami ultimately settled with wouldn't stop fawning at how cute of a couple they were and how she better be invited to the wedding. When Nami told her how she wouldn't be able to move in for a month the landlady announced how she would make sure he wouldn't try to do anything devious while she was away. They both assured her that wasn't necessary, but she did make for a good laugh. She admitted it was nice to have a young couple in love instead of these middle aged couples who constantly fought around their screaming children. The landlady insisted they get the room on the top floor right next to hers just so she wouldn't have grouchy neighbors.

Between work, apartment hunting, and their normal couple activities the two weeks flew by and Hari was carrying her bags to the taxi. Once he put them in they stared at one another for a moment before giving a long but chaste kiss.

"Call me once you get settled in your hotel," Hari squeezed her hand.

"Alright. I will make sure to call you every evening after my work is done. I left a copy of my schedule on the kitchen," Nami's forced a smile.

The taxi driver beeped, "hey lady you're not the only customer today."

"I'll see you soon," goodbye was impossible for Nami to say.

Hari nodded, "I love you."

"I love you too," Nami reluctantly let go and settled herself in the grungy taxi.

Hari shut the door for her and she rolled down her window. They waved goodbye to one another until the taxi made a sharp turn and Hari was out of sight. Nami fell back into her seat trying not to cry. There was no reason. It was just a short business trip and she would see him in no time. Still she couldn't shake her dread completely. The last time she planned to leave Tokyo for the first time it was going to be for good.

The taxi driver stopped in front of the train station and Nami absentmindedly gave him his cash. She stood at the entrance looking through the crowds of people for a hyperactive editor. Instead she found a man holding up a sign with her name on it.

Nami sucked a deep breath in and walked up to the man, "am I a celebrity now?"

The man flashed a brilliant smile that made Nami relax just a bit, "you must be Nami it is nice to meet you. My name is Takumi. Mi couldn't join you on the tour as planned since she got bogged down in some editorial work. I will be joining you instead as your promotional manager."

"Ah so they put you on babysitting duty huh?" Nami took a good look at who she would be spending the next three weeks with. Honestly, he seemed to be around her age or maybe even younger.

"I don't think it is babysitting. It should be exciting, and Mi tells me you are one of the most well behaved workers she has. I have heard some horror stories about some of her other authors. May I take some of your bags?" He stretched his arm out.

"No you don't need to do that. You have your own to carry." Nami tried to wave him away.

He took her tote instead, "I insist. Plus it is only until we get on the train anyway which we should be catching soon."

They rushed to the crowded train and managed to find seats next to one another. Nami supposed now would be a good time to get to know her new coworker. Before she could ask anything he started the conversation, "so since Mi was supposed to be the one traveling with you and the company was looking for ways to cut expenses they set up for you both to share a room together. Since she backed out in such short notice there wasn't much we could do to change plans…"

"I'm going to be sharing a room with a man I barely know?" Nami's heart practically stopped thinking of how she would tell this to Hari.

He found her shock quite amusing, "I'm kidding! You will have your own room for the entire tour no worries."

Nami elbowed Takumi in the ribs, "you jerk. Shouldn't you be nice to me? You don't want to see how devious I can get."

"Is that a fact? You seem to be the good girl to me," he chortled.

"Seriously? No way. I know how to break from the straight and narrow."

"Really like what?"

"Let's just say I used to have bad taste in men and hung out with some of the underbelly of society for a while. Oh and I am a seriously skilled partier."

"Well too bad we're working right now or else I would test your tolerance to alcohol. You have a book signing tomorrow in the early afternoon though."

"Psht like work ever stopped me before. I know how to balance both," Nami flashed a smile.

"So if I we were to go down to the town bar you would know how to have a good time?"

"Yeah of course. That is if you're even old enough to drink."

"I bet I am older than you!"

"How old are you then?"

"24."

"You think I am younger than 24?"

"Well are you?"

"Ahh you have a lot to learn about the ladies Takumi. You never ask a woman her age."

"Whatever. Are you up for a little kick start fun to your first book tour?"

Nami chewed her lip, "it would be a strictly professional celebration right?"

"Of course. We are on a business trip right?" He smiled.

When they arrived at the hotel sunset was settling in Shizuoka. Nami marveled at her accommodations. She was staying in a western style hotel with her own bed, desk, flat screen TV and large bathroom with a huge tub. Nami's heart ached thinking of how fun it would be to have Hari with her now and share her experiences of being out of Tokyo for the first time. She couldn't wait to call him and would have to watch how much she would drink. She did worry about how literate or late she would be out. She decided to call Hari now that she got in.

Hari's voice made her miss him even more, "Hatori Sohma."

"Hello Doctor Sohma," Nami laughed into the receiver.

"Hey Nami," she could hear the undertone of a laugh at his voice. "How is your hotel?"

"It's nice and big. Honestly, it feels a little empty having the room to myself. I already miss you," Nami let a wistful tone touch her voice.

"Try to have some fun. You just started and this is a huge step in your career," Hari crooned.

"I know I will. Tonight I am hitting the town with my coworker," Nami rummaged around her suitcase contemplating on what to wear.

"I didn't think Mi was one to party," Hari shuffled through some papers in his office.

Nami couldn't help but laugh at the thought of Mi on the town, "no she isn't that's for sure. I found out today though she couldn't accompany me because she was stuck editing. Shigure probably gave her a late manuscript just to ruin her fun. There is guy that is a year younger than me, Takumi, who is traveling with me. He called himself something like a promotional manager though I think it is a fancy title to make him and me feel important."

Hari paused a moment longer than needed on the phone, "so this is a biasness pursuit right?"

"What? Yeah of course!" Nami started to realize Hari too could be insecure. "Hatori Sohma I just left the house today. This guy is just a coworker. Seriously you don't have to worry about anything going down. I love you and only you. I just thought it would be a fun way to kick start my book tour. I won't be doing anything excessive. I have work tomorrow, but if you really don't feel comfortable I can stay in."

"No, no don't worry about it. I was over reacted. I guess I am a little greedy since I got to have you all to myself for so long. Like I said I want you to have a good time. Hell maybe even having a professional man to go out with will ward off any town people who are sure to be seduced by your beauty," his cool tone warmed Nami.

"Alright. Well I better be going soon. I don't want to be out late tonight. You have my hotel phone numbers right?"

"Yes they're right by the phone here."

"I think we're the only people in Japan not to have cell phones."

"How about we invest in them once you get back?"

"Then I can't be a recluse to the majority of the world."

"I could always reach you though."

"Ohhh that does change things. I actually have to think about it now."

"Alright well I will let you go. Have fun."

"I will. I love you Hari," Nami gripped the phone tighter as if she could squeeze out his words a little longer after he hung up.

"I love you too. I'll talk to you tomorrow," he was just as unwilling to get off.

Once Hari put down the phone he was left with an empty house and a messy desk of papers. He looked around his office and realized he didn't even have a picture of Nami. He would make sure a picture together would be the first thing they would do when she came back home.


	24. Chapter 24

I am so sorry I am a day late again. I just moved back into my dorm again so I hope now I will have a normal schedule. I think this chapter is far from boring. It's also unedited because I have work in the morning and didn't want to delay this a minute longer. Hopefully, it isn't so rough you can't enjoy it. Please enjoy this chapter. The next, and final chapter will be posted in two weeks.

Chapter 23

"Hari you shouldn't have done that," Nami was tired of restaurants and being berated by questions.

She could hear his smile through the phone, "it wasn't just me. Shigure and Ayame helped too. They said they needed to meet your landlady since they'll be there so often. They said they wanted to initiate your new apartment like they did in the old days."

"Oh man that sure will be fun. You'll join us too right?" Nami's heart felt lighter just thinking about being back with all of her favorite people.

"Well I wouldn't want to impose. Those nights are your thing with them."

"Hari they're your cousins! Nobody would care. Hell I would love to see you drunk and what you would be like reckless."

"Even if I did come…"

"Will come," Nami corrected.

"It does not mean I would let myself get inebriated."

"If you're with us you will. Anyway, back to what we were talking about earlier. You guys really shouldn't have moved everything in for me. I was fine with doing it myself. You all don't have to pamper me."

"Pamper you," Hari scoffed.

"What's so funny? You guys do!"

"Yes letting you get abused by our relative is pampering you I forgot. Or maybe you enjoy living with a cursed man more."

"Listen you're laughable compared to the Yakuza. I was abused much worse and there was no redeeming qualities like actually loving me, or being thoughtful and smart."

"Well what time are you getting on your train tomorrow?"

"I am taking the morning train. I should be back around 6ish. I'll call you 30 minutes before I get to the station."

"Sounds great. I can't wait to see you again."

"I know me either. I love you," Nami had to sign off before she choked up.

Hari returned his love and said his goodbyes. Nami wasn't prepared to be so emotional. The thought of seeing him again felt like a dream. She almost expected to go back to Tokyo and return to her old life without him.

Nami looked at the clock blaring 1 am in big ugly red colors. She felt a little bad for keeping Hari up so late, but by now it wasn't unusual. She dreaded Takumi's knock in the morning not only because she will be ill rested, but she was not looking forward to spending hours on a train with him after what happened a week ago.

Nami and Takumi had been on the road together for two weeks. Nami had been very diligent about setting times with Hari on when she would be back at the hotel room and could talk to him about everything for the day. She never wanted to miss a night. It was hard enough him not being here much less not being able to talk to him. When she signed off for the night she already started counting down the hours until she could talk to him and share all her new experiences with him.

Nami had a lecture in a college at Kobe that day, and Takumi eagerly fetched Nami from her room. At first when they were traveling Nami thought he was being friendly business companion. Now she was getting a bit worried with how often he reached for her hand in "crowds" of people. He offered to go out with her almost every night, but Nami refused most nights saying she was working instead of bringing up how she really wanted to talk to Hari. She thought that would be unprofessional.

She planned to play innocent knowing she only had a week left to deal with him. She hoped she was overreacting and this whole thing would blow over. Of course when Takumi picked her up he made sure to be right at her side the entire time.

The lecture at the university was great. Nami loved hearing from college students and professors. The students had creative insights and had so much energy. Knowing that professors even read her books and took the time to come to one of her lectures was impressive in itself though she did always feel more nervous answering their questions hoping she didn't let them down. Nami gained some confidence when the questions ran over by an hour.

It was off to book signing and this would really be her favorite part of the day. She could see each fans face and wondered what in their life made them connect to her book. It was amazing to see all the different people. It was also wonderful because Takumi manned the sales table at this time. It was the only time of day when she could be out in public without Takumi being right there. Today he seemed especially busy with customers for whatever reason.

Nami was worn out after everything. She always got so worked up internally being around so many fans and trying to present herself in her best light after book signing she would want to crawl into bed, order room service, and talk to Hari. Today had been a particularly enthusiastic group so she ran late, but she always made sure to build in extra time before her calls.

Takumi came up to her right after the signing with a small group of people, "oh hello everyone. Didn't I already sign your books?"

"Nami," Takumi gave an overly sweet smile as he grabbed her hand. "I don't know if you this but I started a raffle today. Anyone who bought a book of yours could enter their name into a drawing to spend the night with you doing dinner and karaoke. These are the winners."

"Oh," Nami wanted to be upset with Takumi for springing this on her after a long day, but she didn't want to disappoint her fans. They didn't do anything wrong and seemed so excited. She wanted to be even more upset at Takumi for using them as a shield to hide behind. He would be getting an earful after this. "It's so nice to meet you all. I am so honored to be able to spend some more time with my fans and get to know you guys a little better."

They went to a nice restaurant and most of the conversation was directed at Nami's novels. She got to direct the conversation toward some of her winner's personal lives and learn about them. Honestly, she was tired of talking about herself all the time and dissecting her books. Half the time what she wrote was intuitive. The couple that won was very cute together but made Nami miss Hari even more. It wasn't lost on Nami that there was only a couple sitting across the table and Takumi was sitting very close next to her.

Because she was so upset and Takumi kept offering Nami drank more than she usually would at dinner. That and Nami was nervous about Karaoke. It was one thing to do it with Ayame and Shigure who she knew didn't care about her pitchy voice and she was in a pretty inebriated state with. Nami wasn't quite sure how to handle a "professional" karaoke experience.

When she got to the karaoke bar she was pretty buzzed and feeling good. Luckily the couple followed suit and were young. They didn't mind her flighty open side and kept commenting how different she could be from her lecture. They were relieved to see she was a normal human too.

The night would have gone alright if it just ended with a few beers and songs, but of course right after the couple left Takumi had to walk Nami back to her room. It did make sense. She was a little drunk and his room was right next to hers, but she just wanted to be alone and try to decipher how late she was for Hari. The numbers on the clock kept blurring though.

Takumi stopped right in front of Nami's door, "goodnight. Get some rest. We have an early start tomorrow."

"I know," Nami shuffled through her bag unable to locate her room key.

"Let me help you with that," Takumi leaned in impossibly close to look through Nami's bag.

Once he found the key he placed it in Nami's hand and held on to it, "um goodnight."

"You know Nami," he squeezed her hand a bit tighter as he leaned his face in a few inches closer, "they were right about you. You are pretty different from your lectures. You're so fun and spontaneous. I think they liked you even more when you showed your true colors like that. I know I do."

Before Nami's fuzzy mind could even processes exactly what Takumi was saying much less what to say Takumi had started kissing Nami. She was so shocked she didn't move, and apparently Takumi saw that as an invitation to start letting his tongue try to pry open her lips. Everything sank in at once and Nami's hand flew up to smack Takumi hard against his face.

Tears welled up in Nami's eyes but she did not want to seem weak before him, "I am going to bed now. I will talk to you about this when you have some sense in the morning."

She slammed the door in Takumi's face who already started to apologize and flopped on the bed. Nami looked at her room phone which blinked furiously several times. Poor Hari was probably worried sick or upset all because of that stupid bastard. What if Hari got mad at her for what happened? What if he didn't believe she didn't kiss back and broke up with her?

Nami wanted to call Hari back right away though it was already 12:30 and he had an early call tomorrow. She knew he would be up worried if she didn't, but she had to cry a bit before she tried making any calls. She couldn't be coherent in this state. Nami looked at the clock again and it blared 1 am Nami knew she couldn't make him wait any longer. She sucked in a few shaky breaths and called the most precious number she knew.

"Hello?" Hari's voice was tense and worn.

"Hari it's me," Nami wanted to continue but her voice cracked and a few short sobs escaped her lips before anything else could come out.

"Nami are you alright? What happened? You're not injured are you? Do you need me go down there? I am sure there is a train I could catch…" all of his words jumbled together with how quickly he was speaking.

Nami sucked in a few more shaky breaths which made worry etch deeper into Hari's voice. "I'm okay. Please, please don't worry so much. I am so sorry I am so late calling you."

"It's fine," Hari's voice was artificially even. She could tell he was still upset, "just tell me what happened."

"Hari I'm scared to," Nami hiccupped.

"Why would you be?" He crooned and his voice threatened to turn to steel with his next question. "Did someone try to hurt you?"

"No, well not really," She tried to think of a coherent way to tell him what happened.

Hari caught on to her unintentional nuance, "not really? Are you sure you're alright? Nami listen stay in your room. I will be there in a few hours."

"Wait," Nami pleaded into the receiver. "I am sorry I am really fine. I am not making much sense. I swear I am okay. You don't need to come down here so late at night."

"Nami I know you say you're okay, but you're not the type to sob into the phone uncontrollably. I have never heard you so upset before. I can't stand that I am so far away from you when you are upset. I will come down and help you out in whatever way you need," Nami heard him gathering his bags.

"Please just listen to me first," Nami begged and when she heard a pause she continued. "I am scared you won't believe what I am going to tell you and that I will lose you."

"What? Nami I will believe whatever you say. When have I ever doubted your word? I am not going to leave you especially if you are so upset about whatever. It just makes me want to be there for you even more," Hari was taken aback.

"I'm sorry I am such a coward. I am keeping you up late because of it. I am so sorry." Nami writhed in bed.

"Nami," Hari's voice was calm but demanding. "It's really okay. Just tell me what happened."

"I miss your call tonight because the book signing went over. Takumi did a raffle so whoever bought a book could be entered in to win a night with me to a restaurant and karaoke. I didn't know he was gonna do that until he brought over the people to my table and it was time to go. Everything went okay from there except I was really pissed at him. We left karaoke late and he walked me back to my room and tried to get my key for me when he kissed me. I didn't kiss back though I promise. Hari I would never cheat on you please believe me," Nami's words slurred into each other. "I slapped him and just never thought he would do something like that. Please, Hari I really didn't kiss back."

"It's alright," Hari's words had a bit of an edge to them.

Nami's heart broke when she heard his voice, "you're mad at me."

"No please trust me. I feel terrible that bastard would try and take advantage of you like that. I still want to come down and beat his ass for making you cry like this. The only reason I am mad is at him. I trust you would never cheat on me, and with how upset you are you clearly didn't do anything."

"You don't want to leave me," Nami's heart instantly felt lighter.

"I never want to," Hari crooned. "Nami I love you."

"I love you too," she was calming down hearing the exchange. It was so natural and heartfelt.

There was a slight pause, "I think I should come down. I don't want him trying to do anything else with you like that. I want him fired."

"Hari don't. You have an appointment with Akito in the morning. How do you think he would react if he knew you abandoned him to come find me?"

"I don't give a damn. Your well being is far more important than what he thinks," he seethed.

It was Nami's turn to consol Hari, "please it will be okay. To be honest we both had a bit too much to drink. I don't think he would do that normally. I am going to have a talk with him in the morning. If he doesn't seem remorseful or tries to pull anything else again you will be the first to know."

"He doesn't deserve another chance. The fact that he did that in the first place…"

Nami cut him off, "means he was drunk and horny. We've all been there. As soon as I slammed the door in his face and slapped him he immediately felt bad and apologized. I want to continue my tour. I owe it to my fans and I will make sure Takumi will be on his best behavior."

"He better be." Hari almost growled.

Nami laughed a bit, "you know you are really hot when you are being all protective. If I was there with you right now I would be all over you."

He couldn't help but laugh just a bit, "too bad you're not. I really would not mind that at all."

"Me either. It's been too long," Nami sighed. "I think being away from you like this for so long has me on edge. That's why I got so upset. I mean normally if that happened I would be pissed not cry."

"Only one more week though. Then you will never see Takumi again. If he tried to get near you again I will make sure he looks the worst case I've ever had."

"Thank you Hari. We better get going and get some rest. We both have big days tomorrow. I love you," Nami dreaded not hearing his voice but was utterly exhausted.

They said their goodbyes and the next week flew by. Nami tore Takumi apart to make sure they had a clear boundary set. For the remaining week he made sure to give her plenty of space and never asked her out on the town again. Hari was never really satisfied and Nami couldn't help but wonder what he would do when he saw Takumi get off the train. Nami did feel good knowing Hari was so protective toward her and loving.

It wasn't just Hari she thought Takumi would have to deal with. The day after the whole incident occurred she received calls from Ayame and Shigure threatening his life. They were ultra protective of Nami after going through all that they did with Kaori. Still she hoped they weren't there to pick her up at the station. She wanted to be alone with Hatori a while before having to deal with their antics, and she didn't feel like visiting jail to bail them out after beating an "innocent" civilian.

Somehow or another she slipped into a sleep and was quite startled when her alarm woke her up much too early for her liking. Still she got everything together quickly met with Takumi. The train ride was polite and very quite. Nami dozed off a few times and by the time the train pulled into Tokyo she felt very well rested.

She spotted Hari before he spotted her. His face was so serious and in just a few moments he caught glimpse of her. He looked elated the moment he saw her Nami couldn't help but feel good that she could have such a strong effect on someone. Hari pushed through the crowd and got right up to her. Nami had to resist the urge to fall into him with a big hug.

Instead he took her bags and kissed her forehead, "welcome home my love."

Nami stood on her tiptoes and planted a passionate kiss on Hari's lips which made him drop his bags. They parted only when they realized they were blocking traffic lingering by the train. Nami took Hari's hand and finally felt whole again. She never thought that she could feel so dependent on another person, but he really did have that impact on her.

"So lemme guess. If Aya and Gure aren't here at the station they must be waiting at my new apartment for me right?" Nami couldn't stop staring up at Hari.

He just smiled down at her, "I am not allowed to say anything."

"You don't need to with an answer like that," Nami let out her first real laugh in weeks. "How were the cherry blossoms here? It must have been very beautiful. I was planning on taking you out on a date in a park with them."

"It felt wrong to welcome in spring without you by my side," his deep sincere voice drove Nami mad. "Before we go to your apartment there is a few things I didn't take of yours there. We will need to go back to the house to get them."

"That's fine. I definitely won't mind a little more alone time with you," Nami pressed herself closer.

She almost laughed at how uncomfortable she used to be when she saw people stare at her and Hari. That was before she could openly admit her emotions and have them reciprocated. She hated how random strangers could sense what they had before she could. Now walking in the mild spring air with the love of her life everything was perfect. Every moment she had with him she wanted to impress in her memory so that when they were old together they could look back at these moments of passionate young love blundering around in the world together.

When she got on to the estate she noticed they weren't walking in the right direction to the house. Nami couldn't muster up any worry at the moment, "Hari we're going the wrong way."

"I know," was his only reply with a peck on her forehead.

They walked silently together enjoying each other's presence and the perfect spring day. Nami felt like she was walking on air being reunited with Hari. She literally couldn't stop admiring him and how lucky she was to have him.

"We're here," Hari prompted with a gentle smile.

Nami doubted anything around her could be more interesting than him but tore her eyes away. She gasped when she saw a cherry tree with most of its blossoms intact, "Hari it's magnificent."

"I know you wanted a grove of cherry trees, but I think seeing this cherry tree alone showcases the extraordinary gift and beauty it brings to an otherwise desolate area," Hari was running his fingers through her hair.

Nami held back tears that threatened to spill over, "this is perfect."

Hari led Nami just beneath the cherry tree and they sat beneath it just watching the petals fall gently down. They could only pay attention to the natural beauty so long before being distracted by the others presence. Hari's scent was intoxicating. She wanted to be on top of him, but making out was alright.

Their little piece of heaven was obliterated by one voice, "Hatori?"

Nami and Hari instantly pulled away to find Akito with an enraged expression on his face. Nami could have sworn her heart stopped and Hari unintentionally reached for Nami's hand. He held on tighter than she imagined.

They were both speechless so Akito filled the void, "you two are dating….or maybe even married, and I didn't even know. You didn't even ask for my approval. That's why she has this control of you. She's manipulating your emotions Hatori. She's making you feel like you have to choose her over your family."

"No Akito," Hari started to literally beg. He never lost his cool like this in front of her before.

"Hari it's alright. I am here to help you now. I won't let this continue," Akito tried to grab Nami's arm, but Hari ripped his hand off. "So that's how it's going to be. You really think you fell in love with her. You're being so irrational you even went to stand against me. You leave me no other choice then. You must erase Nami's memories of the Sohma's."

Nami thought she was going to hyperventilate, "Akito wait. Let me explain please."

Nami tried to get up but stumbled backwards. Hatori was right there to catch her, but she couldn't help but sob knowing he wouldn't be in just a matter of moments. Akito was going to ruin everything and there was nothing she could do about it. So she cried and tried to run from Hari's grasp. If she was going to lose Hari she would at least keep their memories. She couldn't let him suffer like that bearing the weight of their relationship alone.

When Nami broke from Hari's grasp she wasn't able to get far when Akito grabbed her, "now you try to run. You think I can trust someone like you with our most precious secret abroad like that. You're nothing more than a coward. You'll never amount to anything more. All you know how to do is run from your problems."

Nami was shaking and could hardly breathe she was crying so hard. It was true. She always did run away. She ran from Hari and ended up hurting him more. This time was different. It wasn't her fault she was losing her memories that was Akito. If she could keep them at least there was a chance their relationship could continue. Still Nami couldn't make her limbs cooperate they were shaking so much.

"Hatori look at her. If you erase her memories now you could ease her of the pain she's going through. She's paralyzed and hyperventilating. At this point it might be the only way to save her. You don't really believe some normal person could love a cursed being like you? Just look at what you're doing to her. It's Hana all over again," Akito hissed gripping onto Nami.

Hari stood completely still with his fists balled up tight. If they had just gone to the apartment none of this would have happened. Still what Akito was saying was somewhat the truth. Nami was hyperventilating and losing herself. Akito would never approve of them and now there was nothing he could do or say to calm her down because he had to follow Akito's orders as much as he wanted not to.

"Nami," Hari crooned keeping his voice perfectly even as he tried to walk toward her.

She was sent into a fit of hysterics, "you can't be so calm right now. You are really going to do it aren't you?"

"It's for the best. You won't have to feel this pain anymore. I am sorry to have hurt you like this. Let me make it up to you," Hari could feel himself withdrawing deep within himself. He hated what he was about to do.

"Hari," she choked on his name, "if you ever loved me for even a moment you won't do this. Please, don't do this. Hari please…"

He placed his hands on her head, "I'm so sorry Nami. I'll always love you."

Hatori closed his eyes and soon Nami followed suit. Hari let a few silent tears be shed before Akito. He didn't care about appearances before Akito anymore. He didn't think he would care about much as he picked up Nami's limp body knowing it would be the last time he would be near it.

"You did the right thing Hatori," Akito tried to touch him but he smacked his hand away.

Hari started to walk away regretting even more he had no picture of Nami. He feared more than anything he would believe all of this was a dream it was so good.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 24

Hari opened the door to Nami's apartment and saw Shigure pop out from around the corner and started talking, "took you two love birds long…"

"So you will need to tell me if you two are planning on getting married so I have time to design the dress," Ayame talked over Shigure and stopped in his tracks when he turned the corner.

Hatori didn't know what to say so he decided to say nothing. He tried to walk past them but Shigure gripped his arm, "tell me Hari you didn't do it. You said you wouldn't."

Hari tried to shrug Shigure off but he held on tighter as his voice started to crumble, "you said you wouldn't. She said she wouldn't forget. That she would get away…"

Shigure's grip finally faltered as he fell to the floor bereft. Hari kept walking without a single trace of emotion touching his face. He put Nami on her new bed. She looked so perfect right there. He had the biggest urge to just crawl in bed next to her as if he had some right to be there or even belonged there but when she would wake up he wouldn't be greeted with a soft smile and intertwined limbs like he used to. He was a stranger now and nothing more. He was just another face in the crowd now.

He turned to leave the room but Ayame stood at the doorway, "Hari what happened?"

"I erased her memories," it was amazing he was able to say it so easily.

"But why? What happened?" Ayame took a few steps closer. "You're not even upset."

Hatori almost laughed. How could he feel anything now? He felt like he was gutted of everything important inside of him. He understood why authors would write about a hollow shell of a former self. He was now living proof of that.

"Akito asked me to erase her memories so of course I complied," Hari's voice almost cracked in anger at the end. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in, "we should go before she wakes up. I don't want to have to do this again. You should go see Shigure he sounds very upset."

Hatori strode past Aya who stood in disbelief. He even walked past Shigure who was crumpled on the floor. Normally, if he saw his cousin in this state he would be one of the first people to try to calm him down. He knew his actions caused his family much grief and helping them deal with the grief was just as much a part of his duty as erasing the memories was. He couldn't or wouldn't today though. All he wanted to do was crawl in bed and sleep, and he planned to do just that.

Hari only opened his eyes to stare at the blank ceiling when the phone would blare its harsh ring until it finally subsided into a voice message. The only two voices that ever flowed through his house was Ayame's and Akito's. If it was the latter Hatori would close his eyes and roll on his side hoping sleep would find him soon, but doubted it since his couch was so short. He couldn't go to his bed yet. He didn't know when or if he would be able to again.

(Shigure's POV)

Shigure sat in Ayame's room unwilling to close his eyes or blink. Every time he did another memory that he and Nami used to share would flash. Now all his memories would be a ghost of a past. How could seven years of shared experiences and interdependence be wiped away in moments? Did he have any effect on how Nami was formed? If she lost those memories she shared with him would she be a different person all together? Was the person he loved and cherished lost from the world forever?

Ayame stepped in the room and just sat down next to Shigure with a long sigh, "Hari won't pick up his phone. I hope he's okay."

Shigure never blamed Hatori before for what he was ordered to do. He knew it took a great toll on him every time he erased somebody's memory. Shigure lived with the curse too and understood the nature of it, but this time was different. How could he follow that order? Shigure wanted to be bitter and worry for Nami's sake, but he knew the real reason was because he didn't know what he would do without her.

"Aya," Shigure's voice cracked as he buried his face into his chest. "I want her back. I miss her so much. What are we supposed to do?"

Ayame put his head on top of Shigure's, "I'm going to miss her too."

"She was our little sister. Seven years and now we lose her. How is that fair? Haven't we suffered enough? Aya why us?" Shigure sobbed.

There was nothing Ayame could say. It had felt like they suffered enough? He didn't know why Akito wanted them to hurt more. He didn't know why they were chosen for the curse. There was nothing they could do, and nothing he could say to console Shigure. He didn't know how long it would take to get over Nami or even if they could. He seriously doubted that was possible. Ayame held onto Shigure because they were all each other had at the moment.

(Nami's POV)

Nami slowly opened her eyes and was greeted to a place she didn't recognize. She would have been more scared if she hadn't recognized her bed and belongings furnishing the room. When she looked a bit harder and remembered this must have been her new apartment, but how did she get here?

Her head felt so fuzzy. Nami felt like a thick fog covered everything. She tried to remember how she got here. She closed her eyes and sucked in a deep breath in her sheets. She paused smelling a masculine scent. It was so familiar. She sucked in another deep breath of it. It was comforting and she didn't want to stop breathing it in.

She was being picked up at the train station. She was just on a tour. That's right. She had a three week book tour she just got back from. Another deep breath of the scent and she remembered she was picked up by…by…

"Hari!" Nami sat up shocked.

Hari's name swirled in her head and all that it meant. He had taken her to see a cherry tree she so desperately wanted to see with him. It was a perfect spring day and they were together. It was all so perfect it felt like a dream. Then Akito ordered Hatori to…

Nami jumped out of bed terrified of what he state Hari must be in. She threw on her shoes and rushed out the door not even bothering to lock it. Hari had to do the unspeakable again. Her heart went out to him and couldn't even fathom what he must be going through.

She ran down the streets and didn't bother to apologize to people she ran into. She had to get Hatori. He had to be at home safe. Nami busted through the gates and prayed nobody stopped her or called the cops for trespassing. She opened the door to Hari's office and saw he wasn't in there. She stepped in hoping he would be in his room but noticed a lump on the couch. She crept in and saw him on the couch. His breathing was even and deep, but a few tears slid down his cheeks. Nami's heart wrenched and went right to his side.

Even in his sleep his face was tight and upset. He couldn't even get away from his demons in his unconsciousness. Nami was so upset for Hari she went in to hug and comfort him without thinking. After putting her arms around him for a few seconds she realized what she was doing and what wasn't happening. She gasped and held on tighter and joined Hari in crying.

Hari felt himself be pulled out of his slumber. He didn't want to open his eyes. All he really wanted to do was go back to sleep for a very long time. It only took a few moments longer before he felt that his face was damp and he was being held. He tensed unsure of who would be doing this as his eyes ripped opened not sure what to expect.

"Nami," he was convinced now he was still dreaming.

She pulled away a few inches without letting go as tears flowed freely, "Hari. I'm so sorry, but it's okay now. Everything is now."

"You're hugging me?" He scarcely believed she would remember much less this.

Nami watched Hari sit up and look her right in the eye. She just smiled and straddled his lap so she could sit there and went for a full hug as she rested her head on his shoulder. Nothing was in between them and every inch of their bodies was pressed against one another.

"You're not hugging me back. Did you try to erase my memories because you were upset with me?" Nami's breathe grazed Hari's neck.

Hatori held Nami very tight and let a few tears slide down his face, "I'm afraid Nami."

"Of what?" She couldn't imagine why he would be.

"That I am just about to wake up. It's all too good to be true. Having my curse broken and you here with me it just doesn't make sense," he ran his fingers through her hair.

Nami pulled away just enough to look at Hari in the eyes, "well it's real you don't have to be afraid. I am not going anywhere."

Nami went in to kiss him and Hari deepened it faster than she ever expected, but she definitely didn't mind. She pressed against him and started to unbutton his shirt running her hands all over the planes of his chest. Hari slithered his hand under her shirt and let himself explore too. Hatori picked up Nami as she kept her legs around his waist and took her to his room.

Soon they were both half dressed and pressed against each other on Hatori's bed. Nami only looked away from Hari's face to see his perfectly sculpted torso. When they laid on top of one another their bodies meshed perfectly. Nami didn't want to pull away or show self restraint anymore. Hari's hands only slipped as low as her breasts afraid to move too fast and he would once again lose the one he loved. Nami let her hand slip to his belt buckle and started to undo his pants.

It was the first time Hari became completely still since Nami fell atop of him, "are you sure about this?"

"I can tell you're enjoying me pressed against you. It seems cruel to keep denying you," Nami let her fingers drag across his lower abs.

He let out a small sigh and sucked in a deep breath, "I don't want you to feel like you have to do this for me."

"Hari," she ran her fingers through his hair, "I really want this too. I can't stand to wait anymore."

The couple was soon thrown their own paradise. All that world consisted of was their bodies melding together in fluid motions and groans of pleasure. Nami relished that the annoying gap was relinquished and they could enjoy each other in full without any barrier. Nami thought she knew every crevice of Hatori's body, but it was a whole new and exciting experience having hers pressed against his. Sex before this was just a physical act, but with Hatori it was really love making. Nami could have sworn she transcended enlightenment in that state.

Once they finally finished Nami felt as light as a feather and as malleable as jelly. Nami curled into Hari's side, and her head rested perfectly between his shoulder and chest. The arm Nami wasn't laying on covered her protectively. She felt perfectly at peace and safe in those muscular arms twined around her. Feeling the rise and fall of his chest and his gentle heartbeat was all she needed. The late afternoon sun trickled in through the windows and casted a golden tint to the room.

"Nami," Hari's deep voice rumbled through his chest that she lay on, "I have never felt more complete in my life. If bearing a curse for all those years was to pay for a moment like this I think I got a discounted rate."

She looked up at Hari's masculine jaw line, "I'm glad you enjoyed it as much as I did."

For a while they just stayed in bed together intertwined. They didn't need more words because word could never cover the scope of emotions they felt. The heat of their bodies pressed against one another knowing they would never have to part or live in fear any longer was an ecstasy they had to drink in and relish. Nami had no motivation to ever move from the spot and the place in her life she was in now.

Somewhere in the back of Nami's consciousness Nami heard the telephone ring. It was so inconsequential to her she didn't even let it break her meditation with Hatori. There was only one other person in this world that could motivate her to leave Hari's side.

The answering machine clicked on in the distance, "Hatori I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything that happened. Please don't lock yourself away. I need you."

Nami jumped from the bed away from Hari's comfortable grasp. She didn't know Shigure knew about her memories being erased. The pain in his voice was too much to ignore. She grabbed at the phone before the message clicked off, "Gure?"

He was silent for a long moment before he whispered, "Nami?"

"Where are you and Aya? Are you alright?" Her words tumbled out.

"I'm at Aya's," he sounded more confused than ever. "How are you…?"

"We'll be right there in a few minutes. Stay where you are," Nami ordered before hanging up the phone.

When she turned around Hari was standing with his pants on and held out her clothes. Nami fell into his chest and started to cry, "I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you guys like that. Gure was in so much pain."

Hari wrapped his arms around her, "I was the one who tried to erase your memories. You have nothing to feel bad about you kept your memories like you promised him."

She nodded and went up to kiss him, "well we better get over there before they get too curious and come over here and see me like this."

Nami rushed to put on her clothes and wasn't sure where her emotions would take her. Luckily, Ayame's wasn't far away from Hari's. As soon as Hatori opened the door Nami saw Ayame and Shigure with remnants of puffy eyes. She felt so bad she couldn't say anything and just wrapped her arms around both of them. They stiffened for a moment and realized nothing was happening. Hari gave a small smirk toward their way and they both went to hug Nami.

"Nami what is going on? How did you, how are you…?" Ayame was left speechless.

Shigure butt in, "you've always been an overachiever. Keeping your memories and finding a cure to the curse is just too much in one day you know."

"I don't know if I did anything. I just woke up and ran over to Hari's house cause I didn't know you guys knew about my memories almost being erased," Nami smiled up at her best friends who sandwiched her in.

Shigure paused and looked up at Hari, "did you want to erase her memories?"

"No not at all. It was an order so I had to follow it against everything though," Hari fell back into his cool even state that could drive Nami crazy with the urge of just wanting to unwrap him.

"Did you want to with Kana?" Ayame joined in.

"I had to it was the only thing I could do for her at that point with her suffering so much," he wasn't following where they were going with it.

"It's safe to say that all other memories you've erased you thought was just or you had to right?" Shigure was on a verge of a revelation.

"I would say so," Nami thought it was so funny to see how professional Hatori would be in front of everyone no matter if it was his cousins or not.

Shigure pressed further, "maybe that's how the curse was broken. Without your abilities it would be inevitable some accident would happen and find our secret. Without your mental consent your powers didn't work on Nami and you defied the most important order Akito could issue."

Hatori was silent for a moment before speaking, "you're talking out of your ass aren't you Shigure?"

"Well what else could it be? Your powers suddenly don't work and our curse is broken!" Shigure pouted wanting so badly to be right.

"Maybe it was Nami. Maybe my power worked and I followed orders as usual but she had so many memories of the Sohma's for so many years and we formed her life so much it would be almost impossible to erase her memories. Maybe having the complete acceptance of an outsider with such a will to remember and be with us broke the curse." Hari crossed his arms against chest.

"You know what I think?" Nami injected, "I think it really doesn't' matter, though I believe it has more to do with Hari than myself, I have my memories and you guys don't have to suffer anymore. I think this calls for a craziest celebration yet. Why don't we celebrate on the town and stumble back into my apartment and have a drunken sleepover with our new found freedom."

"I hope you all have fun with that. I need to go talk to Akito and see how this affects his health and inform the other zodiac what happened," Hatori started to drift off in his own mind thinking of how to deal with this new situation.

Ayame pulled Hari toward their cluster of affection, "oh no you don't! You could be the whole reason we have this freedom so you simply must celebrate with us."

Shigure let a smile crawl across his lips, "you don't have to come with us Hatori I understand if you need to attend to your duties. I just have to warn you I will be so inebriated and jubilant I don't think I will be able to keep my hands off of Nami when she is so drunkenly cute. Oh I guess you haven't seen her like that yet though. Oh well I guess it will be our little secret with her."

"Please Hari," Nami made her voice low and vulnerable as she batted her eyes up at him.

Hari rolled his eyes, "there is no stopping the three of you when you make up your mind on something is there?"

"Thank you Hari!" Nami let a wide smile flash across her face as she stood on her tip toes and navigated her way around Shigure's and Ayame's arms to kiss him.

"Ohhh I can't wait for the wedding. Tonight will be a little sneak peek on how a drunken Nami and Hari act together. They'll be such cute newlyweds!" Ayame squealed onto one of his tangents again finally letting go of Nami for his larger than life gestures.

Shigure walked up next to Ayame and leaned against him, "oh our little girl is growing up so much. I can't wait to give her away at the isle."

"You give her away? Now that's just not fair!" Aya bickered as they started off for the door.

Nami just laughed as she looked up at Hatori, "do you think they realize we aren't even engaged yet?"

"I think it's ridiculous we aren't," Hari stood tall as Nami looked up and gaped at him speechless. He smile down at her and took both her hands into his and pressed as close to her as he could and lowered his voice to a sincere whisper. "Nami, would you complete me and become my bride who I swear to love and cherish till the end of our days?"

A tear slide down her face as her voice quivered, "I wouldn't want it any other way."

They sealed their engagement with a kiss and a tight embrace. Shigure and Ayame watched silently from a distance though Aya could hardly contain himself. Shigure didn't dare break a moment like that and dragged Aya and started to walk out the door.

"Come on you two we have a lot to celebrate for tonight," Shigure called already through the doorway with Ayame following suit.

Nami and Hatori linked hands eager to walk out and greet a bright future full of hope and uncertainty. Shigure was right she did have a lot to celebrate for today knowing she would be able to walk down a road with her loved ones by her side.

A/N: I hope you all enjoyed the chapter and the series. It is finally done, and I have to thank all of my patient fans who reviewed and waited for months on end without updates. You all are wonderful and I hope this lived up to your expectations. Thank you for everything!


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